Page 43 of This is How I Lied


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“I don’t know, I don’t know,” Eve said, her voice high and shrill.

“It’s probably nothing, like usual. Are you coming over after school?” Nick said. He sounded put out. Did he not remember this morning and the way he grabbed her in the middle of the street in front of Mr. Harper? Did he really think everything was okay?

Eve stopped suddenly and looked up at him in disbelief. “Nick,” she said. “Something happened to my sister. I’m not thinking about after-school plans. I’m not thinking about anything but Nola. Besides, you were a jerk this morning.”

Nick stared down at her as if he couldn’t believe what was coming out of her mouth. She never talked back to him. His slack-faced surprise quickly turned to anger. “You’re the one screwing the old guy and I’m the jerk?” He looked her up and down. “You’ll be back.” Nick’s shoulder grazed Eve’s as he brushed past her, knocking her off balance, and she tripped into the lockers.

Eve knew she should stay quiet, just let him walk away but she couldn’t help herself. Resentment bubbled caustically through her. Maggie’s prediction that Eve would end up getting back together with him kept running through her mind. “And I told you,” she spat at his back, “I can’t see you anymore. I can’t. I’m not coming over after school. I’m not coming over ever.”

Nick stopped in his tracks, his back stiffening. He turned back toward Eve. A ruddy tint spread across his face and he looked around to see if anyone heard how Eve had spoken to him. The corridor was empty. His eyes narrowed and in two long steps he was in front of Eve, boxing her in against a locker. The smell of his cologne was overwhelming, nauseating. The hard metal of a locker handle dug into her back and her books tumbled to the ground. A red piece of paper fluttered from the book that Maggie had lent her and spun lazily to the ground. “What did you say?” he asked, his voice low, angry.

Eve didn’t speak. It was better to keep quiet. No matter what Eve said it would just make him angrier. He hooked a finger onto her turtleneck and pulled down, exposing her neck and the spot where he left the hickey. He ran a finger along the bruise as if admiring his handiwork. In that moment, Eve hated him and promised herself that she would never let him touch her again.

“Meet me at my car after school. Don’t make me come looking for you,” he said as he nuzzled his face against her neck.

“Eve, come on now,” a voice rang out. “Your mom is on the phone. She needs to talk to you about your sister.” It was Ms. Reiss, the school secretary. “Hurry along.” From her vantage point she couldn’t see how Nick had Eve pinned against the locker, that he was holding her wrist so tight that it was growing numb from lack of circulation.

“Coming,” Eve said, trying to keep her voice even, confident.

Nick held her there for a moment longer before grabbing her by the face, his fingers digging into her cheeks. She wanted to bite his face off. “Don’t fuck with me, Eve,” he hissed into her ear and then let her go.

Eve pushed past him and bent down to gather up her books and the red piece of paper that had fluttered to the ground. It was in the shape of a bird. Eve didn’t pause to look too closely at it but slid it back into the book and rushed the rest of the way down the hallway and through the office doors where Ms. Reiss was waiting for her. “Your mom is on line one,” she said, pointing to the phone on the counter.

Eve picked up the receiver and pressed the flashing button. “Mom?” she asked. “What do you want?”

“It’s Nola,” her mother said and from the panic in her voice, for a moment Eve began to think that something bad might have happened. But drama was a given with Nola. Their mother didn’t help things with her overreactions.

“What happened?” Eve asked, checking the clock.

“She didn’t show up to school. They have no idea where she is.” Her mother was on the verge of tears.

Eve let out a sigh. “I’m sure she’s fine,” she said. Nola had run off before. “She’s probably hiding out at the library. She’ll come to school or home when she calms down.”

“I’ve called the library. They haven’t seen her. No one has.” Charlotte’s voice rose. “She’s gone, Eve! No one knows where she is. What if something bad happened? What if she’s hurt? I need you to go look for her.”

“Mom,” Eve began to protest but her mother interrupted.

“I can’t miss any more work. I don’t have any more personal time for the year or sick days,” Charlotte said. “I’d leave if I could, but I can’t. You have to go, Eve. I’m so worried. You know she hates missing school.”

Her mother was right about that.

But still, Eve wasn’t really concerned. Nola was just off pouting somewhere, licking her wounds. She would show up sooner than later. “I can’t just leave,” Eve whined, aware that Ms. Reiss was listening from her spot behind the counter. Eve turned away from her and lowered her voice. “Seriously, Mom, I’ve got a class.” The office door opened and Shaun O’Keefe walked in, gave her a little wave and stopped to wait for Ms. Reiss at the counter.

“Eve,” her mother begged, her voice loud enough for Shaun and Ms. Reiss to hear. “I need you to go look for her. I don’t have a good feeling about this.”

“Fine,” Eve snapped and held out the phone to Ms. Reiss. “I have to go,” Eve said. “I don’t know if I’ll be back today.”

“Are you okay?” Ms. Reiss asked, taking the phone from her hand. Eve nodded and rushed from the office more from embarrassment than concern for Nola.

Though Eve didn’t want to risk running into Nick, she had to stop at her locker and grab her coat. She scanned the hallway for any sign of him but the coast was clear.

“Hey, are you okay?” came a voice from behind her. Shaun again. Great. Everyone wanted a front row seat for the Knox family freak show.

“Yeah,” Eve said. “My stupid sister took off. My mom wants me to go look for her.” She paused in front of her locker. “They drive me crazy.”

“I’ll help you look,” Shaun offered as Eve fumbled with her combination.

“That’s okay,” Eve said, opening her locker door and pulling out her coat. She was mortified.

“Seriously,” Shaun said as they walked down the hallway toward the front doors. “I just finished my last final for the day. I can leave.” He smiled at her. A soft smile so different than Nick’s mean smirk. Shaun, while not nearly as handsome as Nick, had a kind, sweet face.

Eve was tempted but no, Nola had always been something that she had to deal with on her own. “Thanks, but I’m good,” Eve said as they paused at the exit. “I’ll see you after break. Have a good Christmas.”

“You too,” Shaun said. And that was all. He stepped aside to let her pass but when she looked behind her, down the hallway, there was Nick again. Always there. Always watching

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