Page 80 of This is How I Lied


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“Lie back down,” I tell him. “Something might be broken.”

“I’m fine,” he insists. I stand and hold a hand out to help him up and Nola does the same.

I knock it away. “You could have killed him,” I snarl. “You could have taken him right over the bluff. Stay away from him. Stay away from all of us.” Tears spring to my eyes and I’m grateful for the rain.

“He was about to go over the edge of the bluff,” Nola snaps back. “I saved him.”

Cam steps forward and together we lift my dad to his feet. I don’t meet his eyes. I don’t say thank you. I just lead my dad back through the gate and through the yard until we are on the street. Shaun, who had taken the truck to go look for my dad, pulls up and leaps from the truck.

“What happened?” he asks as he helps me guide my dad up the front porch and into the house.

“I don’t know for sure,” I say though a possible picture is beginning to form in my mind. My dad wanted to talk to Charlotte and wandered over to Nola’s house. He was inside that house. I know it. I saw his muddy footprints. Did he see the same things that I did? Did he go down to the basement and see Nola and all the surgical equipment? Even in his confused state, he would know that what he saw wasn’t right, wasn’t normal. Did he run from the house or did Nola lead him away and to the bluffs?

“I don’t know what happened,” I say, knowing that I can’t relay my fears to Shaun, that I can’t tell anyone about what I saw in Nola’s basement just yet. I wasn’t supposed to be in there. I have to manage my own secret first. Then I’ll deal with Nola.

Dripping wet, Shaun and I settle my dad into a kitchen chair. Shaun makes hot tea while I wrap my dad in a blanket.

“I really need to talk to Charlotte,” he says over and over. “I need to give her an update. But don’t worry, Maggie, I found it.”

This is the third time my dad mentioned something that he found and I want to ask him what it was, but I’m afraid of the answer.

“It’s after midnight, Dad,” I say. “It’s too late for updates. It will wait until tomorrow,” I soothe. “You can tell her in the morning.” I’m hopeful that when he wakes up he will forget about everything that happened tonight.

Colin rushes through the front door. “Where is he?” Colin asks, looking around the room frantically. “Is he okay?”

“He’s fine,” I say dropping into the nearest chair, all the adrenaline seeping from my body. “He was behind the Harper house, right on the edge of the bluff. He could have fallen.” I prop one elbow onto the table and drop my forehead into my hand. This isn’t the time to fall apart, I tell myself. I straighten, wipe my eyes and stand. “We need to get him cleaned up and into bed.”

“Jesus,” Colin says, closing his eyes. “I’m so sorry. This could have gone so bad.” I know Colin is waiting for me to say that it was okay, that it wasn’t his fault. It’s true but I can’t quite bring myself to say it out loud.

“You can’t beat yourself up.” Shaun says what I can’t. “These things happen. Now we just need to make a plan so that it doesn’t happen again.”

“Well, I won’t forget to set the door alarms again,” Colin says, rubbing a hand across his face. He looks exhausted.

Our dad needs more than alarms on the door, I think. We are going to have to have some tough conversations. But not tonight. We get my dad showered and settled into bed. Colin starts to head downstairs but I tell him that I want to stay with our dad a little bit longer.

I settle into a chair next to his bed as his eyes begin to grow heavy. I should just let him be, let him sleep, but the curiosity is too much. “Dad,” I begin, “what did you mean when you said, I found it, earlier? What did you find?”

He looks sleepily up at me and I wonder if he’s already forgotten saying it. “The scarf, Maggie.” He licks his lips and speaks so softly that I have to lean in to hear him. “I found the scarf, honey. A few days after Eve died, hidden at the bluffs.” A small gasp escapes my lips and he reaches for my hand, his fingers dry and papery. “I got rid of it for you. You don’t have to worry anymore,” my dad says. His eyes flutter shut and just like that he is asleep.

I want to jostle him awake. He knew that I killed Eve. A cold sweat breaks out on my forehead. I scan my memory for any indication that my dad suspected me, but find nothing. Did he see me that afternoon running down the bluff after Eve and when he learned that she was killed put two and two together?

How did the scarf end up hidden in the bluffs? I know I didn’t take it with me. Was Eve even wearing it in the caves? Everything was so chaotic, I can’t be sure. Maybe she dropped it when she came down the bluff.

It’s the dementia, I tell myself. He doesn’t know anything. My dad is the most ethical person I’ve ever met. Would he keep this kind of secret for twenty-five years to protect me?

I sit in the dark listening to his slow, steady breathing and think about how close he came to dying.

And I think about how close my dad and Colin live to pure evil. Once I’m confident that my dad is fast asleep and not going anywhere, I rise and make my way down the stairs. I hear Colin and Shaun talking in the kitchen and instead of joining them I go to my dad’s office.

There’re no remnants of my dad’s earlier tantrum except for the shattered picture frame that I dropped into the wastebasket next to my dad’s desk. I pull out the frame that still holds some jagged remnants of glass smeared with Nola’s blood, and wrap it in an old newspaper.

I offer to stay the night at the house but Colin insists we go home.

Shaun and I say goodbye, step back out into the misty night and climb wearily into the truck. On my lap is the newspaper-wrapped picture frame. “What’s that?” Shaun asks.

“My insurance policy,” I murmur. Shaun gives me an odd look but doesn’t press the question further. I see Nola sitting on her mother’s front step. I’m so pissed at her for luring my dad to the edge of the bluff. He could have died.

With Nola’s hair glowing ruby-red beneath the soft light of the porch she could be Eve. I bite at my cheeks to keep the tears at bay. How cruel Nola is. Always has been. How could she sit there, hair dyed red, in some kind of twisted Eve Halloween costume?

Nola knows exactly what she’s doing. And I think I finally know what her endgame is. Our eyes lock as Shaun’s truck drives past and she gives me a small, friendly wave. I don’t wave back.

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