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When she poked her head around the corner, I saw the same puffy expression on her face. Did he yell at Hadley in front of Lucy? I knew every couple fought at some point or another, but if you made your kid cry, couldn’t you stop and think? Or did he do and say things intentionally because he knew it was the best way to get to Hadley? I stared at the mother again. Within a few measly hours, he’d sucked the life right out of her like a leech.
“Want to go get that ice cream?” I asked Lucy.
I caught a slight smile before she frowned and looked over at Hadley. “Can we, Mommy?”
Hadley smiled. “If you want to, we will.”
Lucy walked over and grabbed her mother’s hand. “Not if you don’t want to, I don’t.” Lucy was totally withdrawn from me. I could see her, she was there, but she wasn’t the happy-go-lucky kid that ran and jumped into my arms every time she saw me.
That same choked up feeling hit me again as I bent down so that I was on eye-level with her. “We can come back here and watch a movie?” I suggested.
She peeked up at her Mom who was on the verge of tears again. I didn’t know what happened, but the rage that tore through me was on the edge of igniting. The only reason I kept it together was that Lucy was upset. I was furious. Something clearly happened, all because I’d been outside with them. I knew deep down that I shouldn’t have walked away, but I thought it was the right thing to do.
I was wrong.
Covering her trembling lips, Hadley bent down too, taking Lucy’s hands. “Listen to me, Lucy. If it’s okay by me, you’re allowed to speak to anyone I know, okay? Unless Mommy tells you, I don’t care who it is, you don’t listen. Look at me, Lucy.” She cupped Lucy’s cheeks with tears spilling over them. “I’m your mother, and if I say you can, you can.” I saw Hadley nudge her head in my direction right before Lucy nodded and wrapped her arms around her neck and cried louder. “Now, do you want Elijah to take us to get ice cream?” A strong head nod from Lucy even though I couldn’t see her face smooshed into her mom’s shoulder. “Okay, then we will.”
“What’s wrong?” I didn’t know who I was asking. They both had me sick to my stomach with worry. I couldn’t bear to see either of them cry. When neither answered, I tapped Lucy’s shoulder. “Lucy…” Her ignoring me messed with my head. I was terrified. I never realized the power a parent could have on a kid, even one that didn’t seem worthy of that title.
“Let me get my shoes.” Lucy pulled away from her mom, wiping and hiding tears from me as she walked around me.
I glanced to Hadley desperately. All she did was give me a weak smile as she stood. “Let me change Eli real quick.”
“Can you help me?” It took me a moment to realize Lucy was talking to me since she hadn’t been her usual self with me. I reached for her pink shoes.
“Yeah. Sit down.” She flopped onto her butt watching me as I tied up her shoes. “Want to go on down to the truck while your mom gets Eli ready?” I asked just to see what she said. She nodded and stood with me. “We’re heading down to the truck,” I called out to Hadley.
“Okay! All I have to do is grab my shoes and Eli’s diaper bag.”
Lucy reached for my hand as we headed out the door. It surprised me, especially since she was barely talking to me, but I grabbed onto her tiny one like it was a lifeline—desperate to get her smile back.
“Know what makes me happy?” I mumbled as we took our time walking down the steps.
“What?” She blinked at me with sea-blue eyes like her mother’s.
“When you smile.” And slowly, but surely, Lucy did just that, gripping my hand tightly.
“I didn’t want to,” Lucy murmured, and I glanced down at her.
“Didn’t want to what?”
“Listen to Dad.”
“Why?”
“He said he didn’t want us around you.” She was sniffling again. “Called Mom names and told me not to talk to you, or he’d be mad. That’s why I hate going to Meme Lilly’s. Dad just takes me there and leaves me with her. She says bad stuff about Mommy, and it makes me cry.” I scooped her up. She was crying too hard to walk. She wrapped those little arms around my neck, and I wondered how any adult could live with themselves for making her cry. “Everything’s different. I don’t want to go there anymore, but Mom says I should because Daddy misses me.”
“As long as your mom lets me, I’ll always be your friend Lucy. I promise.”
_______
Lucy ran up the stairs in front of us. She wasn’t back to her normal spunky self, but it was coming back. We made a short trip to get ice cream and pizza—Lucy’s choice. I carried both boxes while Hadley carried Eli.
“You’re exhausted,” I said to her.
Hadley sighed, offering me a small upturned mouth. “Only mentally. Today’s been draining.”
“I’m not leaving until we talk about that,” I warned her.
