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But also, a little. The ground was starting to twist and slide a bit, and it was making me dizzy.
The plan had been to get just tipsy enough that it took the edge off all the shame and guilt I was feeling. I just hadn’t expected said edge to be so relentlessly sharp. And it got progressively worse as the day went on.
I lost count of how many shopping bags we racked up and stopped trying to saynoabout halfway—and three champagne flutes—into the four-hour appointment. There was no point. Julie would wave her hand and tell Luke to “add it to Ria’s pile. She’s just being shy.”
The lingerie selection was the worst part. I had to chug two full glasses to get through the digital catalog Luke had slipped onto my lap. Finally, after scrolling through sixty-four pages of silk and skimpy lace without having selected a single item, he suggested going with theAutumn Honeymoon Collection. I didn’t know what the collection entailed, but I was more than ready for the experience to be over, so I agreed and put the tablet aside.
The spa was located one floor above the department store. It was also just as ridiculously exclusive, and just as secretive about its pricing. There wasn’t a single number listed beside any of their services.
We were greeted by warm, ambient lighting, soft color palettes, subtle wafts of lavender and mint, and more champagne as soon as we walked through the glass doors. And I slowly started to lose track of... everything.
The alcohol was fizzing underneath my skin, warming and numbing me enough that I began to float through the experience instead of resisting it. There was the massage and the mud bath and the facial, the healthy lunch filled with light chatter, laughter, and (more) bubbles, and finally the hair, brow, and nail appointments.
The sky was dark by the time we finally left, Alice wasn’t trying to avoid talking to me anymore, and all my limbs felt like soft goo.
The guilt was going to come back tomorrow with a vengeance, I knew it would, but I was too relaxed and drunk to care anymore. All I wanted to do was float on this fluffy, careless cloud of bliss forever.
“It sounds like the boys are out back,” Julie said softly when we entered the house. I didn’t know where all our shopping bags had gone, but I hadn’t seen them since we left the department store. “Come on.” She reached for my hand, wrapping her smooth fingers around my palm.
I liked Julie. She was kind and generous and soft, and she spoke about her kids with so much love that it made my chest squeeze in a strange, longing way. She’d gushed about Adrien over lunch. About how proud of him she was, how hard he always worked, how happy she was that we’d found each other.
“I was starting to worry about him,” she’d said, tearing up. “Between the stress of his job, all the bad press, and everything that happened last year… Well, it doesn’t matter now, does it? I’m just so glad you’re here, and I’m so happy he’s finally happy.”
Tomorrow. The guilt was going to suffocate me tomorrow.
“I’m gonna shower then head to bed,” Alice said, stretching her arms all the way above her head. “I’m tired from all that relaxing. Night, Mama.”
“Night, sweetheart.” Julie gave her daughter a warm kiss on the cheek, and my heart squeezed in that peculiar way again. The new way I wasn’t familiar with.
“Night, Ria.”
“Goodnight,” I replied softly, offering her a small smile.
Then I was being guided through the foyer, the living room, the kitchen. All the way to the sliding doors that led to the backyard. The large, lavishly decorated patio was illuminated by a mixture of soft lighting and an outdoor fire pit. And it was just so…warm.
“There you are,” Anthony said, standing up. Hetsked playfully at his wife as she released my hand and floated straight into his arms. “Our dinner reservation was over an hour ago,” he chided softly, smiling into her hair.
Another pang.
“We got carried away,” Julie replied. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. You had fun?”
She hummed. He smiled.
Pang.
And I was so busy watching their interaction that I didn’t notice Adrien until he stood up. I blinked, my lazy gaze refocusing. He was wearing a pale blue shirt with the top buttons undone, his sleeves rolled up to reveal those tanned, corded forearms. A watch. Belt. slacks.
His eyes were black in this lighting. And they seemed stuck. Like time had frozen for them midblink. His mouth was parted ever so slightly, and it… they weren’t mediocre. His lips. I’d lied.
Pang.
This one was different. This one didn’t squeeze my chest with yearning; it kicked and swooshed with something much more unsettling.
You’re staring again, Sanchez.
The musical sound of soft laughter plucked me out of my drunken daze. “It suits her, huh?” There was a smile in Julie’s voice.
