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She lifted her chin. “I’d constantly send the wrong officer to a scene instead of the one assigned to that area.”
I needlessly checked my nails. “They probably needed two units to respond, anyway.”
“I had a hard time not mixin’ up my ten codes,” she insisted, standing straighter with a hint of challenge sparking in her eyes.
I tilted my head, not giving in. “Ah, so youarehuman.”
That had her crossing her arms, like convincing me she could be bad at something was a hill she’d die on. “Once, I left the floor and went to the bathroom—without gettin’ anyone to cover the channel first.”
“You didn’t.”
“I did. And then I cried like a baby on the toilet until one of the seasoned dispatchers came in and had a talk with me.”
Narrowing my eyes, I searched her face. “I don’t believe you.”
The first part was probably normal. But imagining Paisley Stevens being so overwhelmed and out of control that she’d run away to cry in the bathroom?
There was no way.
“It’s true,” she insisted. “I couldn’t believe all the stuff they were tryin’ to cram down my throat or how one person was supposed to keep so many things straight when they were all essential for both civilianandofficer safety. I told her—the other dispatcher, Mary—that I didn’t belong there. I told her I’d been good at everythin’ I’d ever done. About my straight A’s and my perfect attendance record and the fact that the only reason I knew what the inside of the principal’s office looked like was because of volunteerin’. Well, that and pickin’ up my brotherafter he’d gotten in trouble and my parents were both tied up with work. It was my first job, but it was startin’ to make me think it’d be my last because I’d wind up gettin’ somebody killed. Then the whole world would know I was trash, and no one would ever hire me again.”
After that long confession, my tongue was in knots, but I finally forced out a strangled, “And what’d Mary say to all that?”
“Well, she started by tellin’ me I can’t just run out the room when I’ve got the channel. So, you know, she highlighted yet another mistake.”
“Then what?”
Paisley sighed. “Then, she told me she’d seen a lot of people come and go in the twenty years she’d been there, and she could tell I could handle the job. She told me that once I got it... I’d be good at it. And once that happened, I’d know I could do just about anythin’.”
Relief flooded me, and I was oddly grateful that even though the woman sounded like a tough nut to crack, she’d been just the person to talk Paisley off the ledge that day. “And now here you are, provin’ my original point.”
Her brows furrowed. “And what point was that, again?”
“That you’reyou, and that’s why I didn’t need to ask how you were doin’ with the job.”
She pursed her lips, and it took everything in me to tear my gaze away. This wasn’t good for us. Standing here talking like that night in Nashville had never happened did nothing but confuse us both. I could tell. If anyone watched this scene unfold, they’d think we were two coworkers who might one day become more.
And that simply wasn’t the case.
“I’m gonna head in there,” I said, hooking a thumb over my shoulder at the hospital doors.
She eyed the doorway over my shoulder, then wordlessly nodded.
“Wait, uh, you probably wanna head in there, too, huh?” I asked, scratching my neck. I needed some air, and since I was already outside when I started to feel that way, I had a feeling I wouldn’t feel better until I was anywhere other than whereshewas.
“I do, but?—”
“I’m gonna run out for some better coffee.” I stepped toward the parking lot. “The sludge at the station is bad, but I think they need to call in a hazmat team for whatever they’re brewin’ in there.”
“Adam?”
I’d already spun toward the parking lot, but my name on her lips had my feet halting in place without my permission. I didn’t face her fully, though, just turned my cheek. “Yeah?”
“All the same... thanks for askin’ how I’m doin’.”
My throat had closed, so I had nothing for her but a nod that probably looked a little more curt than I meant it to. Combine that with the way my hands flexed into fists as I walked away, and she probably had me all wrong—as usual.
But everything about my situation with Paisley felt wrong… and now that her brother was in town to remind her why we’d shut down any chance of a future together? I had a feeling we’d never make it right.
