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Ellery
“I don’t know. It’s all just….breadcrumbs, leading to something I just can’t figure out.”
“We’ve got plenty of time.” Jenica looks up at me from where she’s sitting on the floor in my room watchingMTV. “We’ll figure it out. Don’t worry.”
“We better.” I lay back on the bed and kick at a paper next to my foot. “Summer is flying by.”
She turns around and places her chin on the bed. “Could this little bout of frustration, by any chance, have anything to do with a certain baseball player you’ve been spending a lot more time with lately?”
I can tell by the way she’s looking at me she’s expecting an answer. Instead of giving her one, I grab a pillow and scream into it.
Ever since Cruz and I came back from Elmhurst, wehavebeen spending a lot of time together. Between helping me try to figure out this mystery with my father’s case and the two of us needing to let what we feel run its course, it seems we alternate between scouring information and making out or fucking.
I’m not complaining. Cruz is an amazing kisser and sex with him was always good. But the change between us was noticeable, and while it feels good, it is also confusing as hell.
Cruz and I may have been onto something with the rules we suggested—letting anger go and working each other from our systems—it’s not working the way I thought it would. If anything, it feels like he’s ingrained deeper in my marrow.
Part of the reason I agreed to Cruz’s little curveball of lettingwhat we feel run its course was because of all the pent up need I had from never being able to properly say goodbye to him two years ago. But the longer this little game of ours went on, the deeper I could feel myself falling.
When I forgave Cruz, I dropped my guard and let him back in, and the guy I fell for—the dreamboat with an infectious smile and gorgeous eyes—had sucked me right back into his orbit.
Being with him is effortless and he is just as quick witted, smart, and passionate as ever. The more I am with him, the more I want him. And the sex…my goodness. He still knows how to touch me, and make me shatter, over and over.
We’ve also evolved from stealing time in the shadows at night, to spending time together during the day. When Jenica has to work or Jake and the other guys are doing their own thing, Cruz comes over. Sometimes we work, other times we play. Sometimes we put on a movie and just lay like broccoli.
But Jenica’s right. I am frustrated. And not because of how much time Cruz and I are spending together, but because of my own inability to remember my boundaries.
When I opened my heart back up to Cruz, I did to the dream of us as well, and that scares me because I have always known what is and isn’t possible when it comes to us. But I can’t stop wanting it and it makes me feel weak.
“Can I say something?” Jenica asks, while pulling the pillow down from my face. When her eyes meet mine I nod slowly. “Why don’t you two just try and figure out a way to be together? I mean, you’re clearly crazy about one another.”
“We aren’t—”
“Stop.” She holds up a hand. “Don’t try to deny it. I know how you feel about him, Elle. I’ve known since the day we met. But I can see how crazy he is about you, too. That boy will steal the shadows from the night just to be with you.”
I smile and look down, picking at an invisible piece of lint.“That’s a little dramatic.”
“Oh, come on,” she scoffs. “Just admit it. I mean, look at you. You’re all moony. And you know, you could do worse. He’s actually a pretty decent guy.”
I look up, surprised by her confession. “Oh yeah?”
“I didn’t tell you this, but that day he went to Elmhurst after you, I ran into him on the beach. He knows my brother, apparently, and the two were talking and he offered to help hang up the fliers for Caleb’s sister. He left of course to go after you, so Jake did instead. But still…he went right into help mode. Told Jake to get copies made and make sure no one tore them down. It was really cool.”
I smile, warmth stirring in my chest. “He did?”
“He did.” She nods. “I mean, if you had to wind up with someone, better him than anyone, right?”
I reach for her hand and give it a squeeze. “Any news about Caleb’s sister?”
When I first showed Jenica the MISSING persons flier and learned it was one of her brother’s friends’ sisters, my heart sank. I’d talked to Caleb a few times and he seemed like a nice guy. But when Travis told me she was one of a five that had gone missing over the past year, it alarmed me.
Cherry Cove had always been safe. Nothing on that level ever happened here. But as scary as it was, I couldn’t let it deter me. I had things to do this summer and couldn’t worry about some crazy person.
Knowing that crazy person had turned a few lives upside down, however, I now felt bad for not asking about them more. Especially since Jenica knew each of the girls.
“It’s a moot point,” she shrugs. “Reports have been filed and an alert issued in some nationwide systems, but that’s about it. They have more or less been swept under the rug, like they don’t even matter.”
“They do matter.” I squeeze her hand. “I wish my Daddy were alive. He’d help. I know he would.”
