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“Oh, that’s Lott… I mean, Charlotte, my matchmaker.”
“Fuck! For real?” Caleb blurts out.
“Language,” Erin reprimands after swiping Caleb’s phone out of his hands.
“Wow,” Erin marvels, wide-eyed, handing the phone to her husband so he can also take a peek. “She is very pretty.”
“I think the word you really want to say is that she’s hot!” Caleb interjects with a chuckle. “Dude, can she be my matchmaker next?”
“Careful,” I growl from deep within, silencing the whole room.
“Wait… did you just give me the stink eye for calling your matchmaker hot?” Caleb continues to taunt.
“Caleb, I would shut up right about now. Don’t poke a sleeping bear,” Jack warns.
“All I said was that she’s hot. He has eyes. He knows she’s a babe.”
“Don’t talk about her like that,” I say through gritted teeth.
But Caleb’s smile just widens further, as if the fucker had a death wish or something.
“Ignore my brother-in-law. He was dropped on his head when he was a baby,” Erin scolds him. “Though, I do have to agree with him that your matchmaker is a looker.”
“She’s also taken,” I mutter, with a slump in my spine.
“Ah, I see.” She frowns. “Well, no matter. Plenty of fish in the sea, as they say. Has she had any success setting you up with someone nice?”
“More importantly, have you gotten laid yet? Cause, dude, your balls must be black and blue just by spending time around that piece of ass.”
“Caleb,” I growl, my hands balling into fists, ready to swipe that Cheshire Cat grin off his face.
“Geez, okay. I won’t talk about her like that. Damn.” He pouts, having the good sense to stand up from his stool and giving me a wide berth.
“I fear for our girls. If they grow up and date assholes like my brother-in-law, we’re doomed.” Erin sighs.
“Like I’d ever let that happen,” Jack jokes.
“Hey, I’ll have you know that I’m a catch,” Caleb defends, crossing his arms over his chest.
“If a girl wanted to catch herpes, then yeah, you’re a catch,” Jack counters with a smirk.
“Or crabs,” Erin piles on.
“Gonorrhea,” Jack adds.
“Or chlamydia.” Erin laughs.
“Why do I even come here? You two are jerks,” Caleb grumbles, taking Cara out of her father’s arms. “Isn’t that right, baby girl? Your mommy and daddy are a couple of poopie heads.”
“Poopie heads! Poopie heads!” she parrots, giggling while Caleb bounces her up and down around the room.
“Stop teaching my kid shit like that,” Jack chastises with a frown.
“Oh, and cursing like a sailor in front of them is so much better?!” Caleb laughs.
“Ma and Pa did it all the time, and I turned out just fine. Don’t know where they fucked up with you, though,” Jack rebukes with a mocking grin.
Caleb, in reply, whispers something in Cara’s ear for her to say to her father.
