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"Sounds about right," she says, and releases a yawn as she quickly gets dressed, pulling on her panties and leggings. "I need to get home."
I nod as I step backward, buttoning my fly while I watch her. I have no idea why I'm pissed she's leaving. This is exactly what I wanted. No strings. Just sex. So her saying she's going home should make me happy, relieved even. But she seems happy to leave.
I walk her to her car. She's smiling as she slides into her seat. "I'll see you soon, Preacher."
I lean down and press a kiss to her lips. "Count on it, babe." I close the door and take a step back. She starts the engine and pulls out of the parking lot. I watch as the vehicle disappears, and I can't help but wonder why I'm so fucking attached to her. I don't even know her. Fuck, I don't trust anyone but my brothers. I doubt I could ever put my trust in a woman again, not after the shit that went down with Pepper.
That bitch fucked up my life. She got away easy with the shit she did. She'll burn in Hell, that's for sure.
CHAPTER8
PREACHER
"You good, brother?" Pyro asks as he takes a seat beside me. I bring my beer bottle to my lips as I glance around the clubhouse. Denis and Callie's kids are here as Callie wanted to spend time with her daughter while Denis was working. She has all four children with her. There's also Wrath and Hayley's kids—Eva and their nine-month-old, James. It's getting easier to be around the kids, but fuck, it still brings back a fuck ton of memories. I miss Tyson so fucking much, and as much as I'd hoped the distance between us would ease that, fuck, it hasn't.
"You still not sleepin'?" he asks and I sigh. He sees everything. The man knows what's going on with everyone. There's not a day that goes by that one of my brothers doesn’t ask how I am. I get that they're looking out for me, but it's not what I need. It's just bringing up my past, and Christ, that is the last thing I fucking need. I may be struggling, but there are times when I'm able to push through it, but then they'll ask questions, which'll send me spiraling and make me want to drink. Hence why I'm having a fucking beer before it's even mid-afternoon.
I don't answer him. I don't want to talk about it and I sure as hell don't want to relive it all.
"You've always been a stubborn fuck," Py spits. "We're just worried about you."
"Get that," I say as I take another sip. "But you’ve gotta understand, brother, it happened, and there's nothin' I could have done differently. I'm tryin' to fuckin' move on, but constantly bein' questioned ain't fuckin' helpin'."
I hear his deep intake of breath and watch as he nods. "We're goin' about this the wrong way." He glances over to where his old lady is sitting. She's smiling brightly as she talks with her mom while they watch the kids. His woman's happy, and I know that's all Pyro's ever wanted. Moving to Ireland was the only option the man had to ensure that he kept the woman he loved. While he lost being around his brothers, he gained a fuck of a lot more. His relationship with his sister, Hayley, strengthened, and in turn he's closer to his niece and nephew. I don't think I've ever seen my brother as happy or as settled as he is here.
"We'll do better. But, brother, the drinkin' has to stop."
"The fuck?" I snarl as I glare at him.
"I remember how shit was when Reaper was sent down; how you turned to alcohol to get rid of the guilt. You use booze as a way to numb everythin'. I won't let you sink that low again."
"Don't need to numb shit," I lie. "I have a drink when I want to, not 'cause I need to."
I’ve felt a lot of guilt in my life. What went down with Abel, it was beyond fucked up. Thankfully, before I spiraled too deep, I found the club, and I was able to move past the guilt. But then Reaper took the blame for my fuck up. I knew the guy was waiting for me outside the club and I knew he was going to provoke me. I should have walked away, but fuck, I didn’t. Instead, I beat the ever-loving shit out of him and almost killed him. The cunt called the cops beforehand in an attempt to set me up, and boy did he do it good. Only, Reaper was there, and he took the fall for me. He served four years in prison for me, ensuring that I didn’t serve a life sentence. Christ, that guilt ate me up. I felt it deeply. For four fucking years, I couldn’t function. The knowledge that my brother was inside for a crime I committed was more than enough to send me spiraling. I was in a bad way. Then I found out that my son wasn't mine, but Reaper’s. I couldn’t keep Tyson from him. The man had already given so fucking much for me. I couldn’t keep his son.
Now, my life’s in fucking shambles. Its guilt and pain that threaten to knock me to my knees every fucking time I open my eyes, every time I breathe. It’s fucked up that I can’t seem to escape it. Nothing I do is making it easy.
He gives me a sly smile. "You sure 'bout that, brother?" I nod. "Then alright. How about a bet?"
"What bet?" I ask, already regretting saying anything.
"I bet that you can't go an entire week without havin' a drink."
Fucking Pyro. He's too fucking observant. I haven't been able to sleep without either fucking or drinking. He's putting me to the test. There's one thing he knows I can't do and that's turn a fucking bet down. "And if I do, what do I get in return?"
"Whatever the fuck you want, brother."
I nod. "If I go a week without touching a fucking drop of booze, then you and the rest of the brothers, along with your old ladies, stop this shit of askin' me if I'm okay. I'm as good as I'll ever be and there's nothin' that's goin' to change that outcome. Deal?"
He holds out his hand and I shake on it. "You've got yourself a deal. But you fucked up, brother—I was gonna get everyone to stop anyway."
Fuck!
"Now, you don't want to talk about the past. How about the girl? Ailbhe, right?"
Ah, the woman who’s never far from my mind. Since we agreed to be fuck buddies, I've been able to sleep. The woman is so fucking insatiable that by the time I'm finished fucking her and make it home, I'm collapsing into bed and passing out until morning.
It's been a week, and there's not a night that goes by without us finding somewhere to have our hookups. We've been using a hotel, something I've been booking. I should probably find an apartment. It would be a fuck of a lot cheaper.
