Page 23 of Heartless Monster


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I scoff, hoping he’s bluffing because I might be a loner most of the time, but even I want friends that Rome can’t destroy. “You’re kidding? You expect me to tell you my secrets just so you can use them against me? You really are delusional.”

He squeezes my sore wrist tighter, and I’m sure I’ll be wearing his fingerprints as a bracelet for the next couple days, especially after last night. “You either tell me, or I’ll find out on my own. And if I don’t like what I hear, you’ll be punished.”

“Punished?” I blurt out in an exasperated breath. “You’re insane, Rome.” I try to tug my wrist again, and I’m about two seconds away from spitting in this psycho's face if he doesn’t let me go.

“Rome,” I hear a familiar voice holler from somewhere in the locker room—Luke’s voice. “Is that you?”

Rome’s voice drops to a whisper as his mouth ghosts my ear. “You heard me right. This isn’t a joke, Elodie. This is my school. I have more pull than you could ever imagine. It’ll be in your best interest not to cross me because the students of Willow Creek High will eat you alive if you do.”

Luke appears from around the corner and Rome drops my hand. I stand here frozen, unable to even look at either of them out of shame and humiliation.

“Practice is starting,” Luke says, a look of confusion on his face. “Let’s go, man.”

Rome pats a hand to my cheek, smirking. “Remember what I said, Freckles.”

“Quit calling me that,” I shout as he gives me his back and walks away.

I watch as they leave, and when Luke flashes me a glance over his shoulder while murmuring to Rome, I quickly turn away, not willing to let him see the tears that are now falling down my face.

Rome already knows he won this round. I will just have to try harder next time. I have no idea how I “ruined his life,” but I will make damn sure he doesn’t ruin mine.

CHAPTER 9

ROME

I’m on the bench in the locker room, waiting while the guys suit up for tonight’s game. I’ve got my jersey on, but no equipment, no compression pants, no knee pads. Just a pair of black warm-ups, high-top Air Force Ones, and my teal-and-black Willow Creek Misfits jersey.

“It won’t be the same without you tonight,” Aiden says as he pulls his shoulder pads over his head.

“It is what it is,” I tell him, knowing there’s nothing I can do about it. As much as I want to pitch a fit about being on the bench and not playing with the team I’ve been with since I was a kid, I’m keeping my cool.

One game down, three more to go, then I’ll be back out there. I’ve been going through phases, thinking it doesn’t matter that I’m missing these games to feeling like I can’t wait to come alive on the field again.

But what’s the point when I’m not playing for scouts anymore? No one is watching and waiting for me to come play for them after high school. Now it’s just about my love of the sport, and the more I watch my team from the sidelines, the less connected I feel to the game. There are moments when I wonder if I really loved football as much as I thought I did, or if I just loved the control I had on the field. I feel powerless without the ball.

I know they all look at me like I’m a fuckup. I’m the one who beat that fucker with an old pipe. What they don’t know is why I did it. It wasn’t for me. They also don’t know why I got caught. That was all because of her.

“Ready, man?” Luke asks with a clap to my shoulder.

I nod and drag my ass off the bench, only to go sit on another one outside under the Friday night lights.

There was a time when I’d walk out these doors to the field and the crowd would chant my name. But no one cheered for me louder than my mom. Her voice could overpower the hundreds of people in the stands, and I always heard her.

I could easily save myself the embarrassment of even showing up tonight, but I’m not giving up just yet. I look at the blue skies and see the sun setting low behind the clouds. I can only hope I’m making my mom proud in one way or another. At least I’m here, facing the consequences of my actions.

I don’t dwell on her often, and it’s not because she doesn't cross my mind. It’s definitely not because I’m never reminded of her. In fact, everything reminds me of her. She appears in my thoughts every minute of every day. I just push the thoughts away because I’m not ready to face the truth that I’m never going to feel the warmth of her hugs again. I’ll never hear her voice tell me to keep going when I’m at my lowest. I always tell myself I’ll allow my heart and mind to grieve her absence tomorrow. So today I’m not going to miss her. Maybe tomorrow I will.

“Huddle up,” Wilder curls his fingers, calling us to circle around him.

It sucks that I feel like an outcast. Like I don’t even belong here anymore. I know it’s what everyone is thinking. I was replaced by my brother as quarterback and he’s kicking ass. It’s his time to shine and I can't deny the bitter mix of envy and pride in my chest. Wilder has always been a stellar running back and I always believed he would finally get the recognition he deserved one day. I just never imagined it would be by taking my spot as QB.

Wilder wouldn’t even accept the position until he talked to me about it. It was sprung on me out of nowhere and to say I was fucking shocked would be an understatement. I assumed Gage, my backup, would fill in. After all, that’s what his role on the team is. I’m still not sure what the fuck Coach was thinking when he made the call.

On a whim, I told Wilder it was cool—no hard feelings. But at the first game last Friday, when I heard the crowd chanting his name over mine, it felt like a fucking knife was stabbed into my back. Not just by him, but everyone—Elodie included. Her role in my downfall is more than she could ever imagine.

I hang back a few feet, listening as Wilder pumps the team up for the game. It's impossible not to feel his energy as he grabs Luke by the mask on his helmet and growls, "Let's crush those Panthers!"

“Hell yeah,” Luke booms back, grabbing the shell of Wilder’s helmet with both hands. The team joins in on the excitement, pumping each other up.

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