AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I was just wondering if you think my dragon is… different than yours.” That was the crux of it. I didn’t feel like I was truly a shifter, or truly part of this clan. “I wasn’t born with a dragon, Evan. This isn’t how it works. Do you think my dragon feels differently from yours? Behaves differently? Do you think she’s as confused about all of this as I am? I mean, it’s still so overwhelming—”
“Shh.” Evan stood and rounded the desk, clearly sensing my shot nerves. He ran a soothing hand over my back, then gently massaged my shoulders. I sighed into his touch, needing it more than I’d realized. My dragon seemed to sigh within me as well.
“As you know, dragons don’t typically have their first shift until puberty, but you would be right in saying our dragons are born with us. They’re part of us from birth, and even while they remain dormant inside, they know who their keeper is. With your situation, I wouldn’t be surprised if she is a little confused. She doesn’t know how she came into existence because she was never born. She didn’t learn about the world through your eyes over your lifetime.”
“Do you think that has anything to do with why I haven’t shifted yet?” I hadn’t considered it, but my dragon was probably afraid and confused. I didn’t blame her. I was, too. The idea of shifting terrified me.
“To your dragon,” Evan continued, coming to sit next to me, “this awakening is just as random and unfamiliar. You’re learning together. But just because you haven’t been a part of each other your whole lives doesn’t mean you’re that different from any of us. Your dragon is a part of you.”
Part of me felt saddened by his explanation. No matter what he said, my dragon and I were different from those that’d been born as shifters. But his words also gave me a bit of insight I hadn’t considered before. We might be different from the others, but we weren’t so different from each other. Neither of us had asked for this to happen. Neither of us were given a choice.
As soon as the thought slipped through my mind, resentment, ice cold and razor sharp, pierced me. It was enough to take my breath away. I thought I’d known the gamut of feelings about having been turned against my will, but feeling them whip through my dragon made it hard to contain myself.
I tried to gather my control and tamp it all down before Evan picked up on it, but who was I kidding? The look on his face told me that not only had he seen it, he’d also felt it.
His expression was stark, his mouth pinched as he stared at me, the look in his eyes full of hurt and confusion. Guilt washed over me like a tidal wave, but I didn’t know what to say.
He stared at me a moment longer, but then seemingly decided not to press the issue. “We should make sure your name is on the visitation list for the prison. We need to find out what we can do before Tomas gets even more desperate."
“Right.” I nodded, grateful for the distraction more than anything. “I’ll go call them now.”
I hurried from the room, my heart racing as I strode down the hallway. My emotions were raging yet again, a firestorm that threatened to consume me. I hated the hormones, the dragon puberty, hated feeling this way: resentful, confused, and guilty all at once. It wasn't fair to Evan, who had done nothing but support and love me. That Tomas did this to me wasn’t his fault. I didn’t resent Evan for it.
Yet there was a part of me that thought none of this would’ve happened if I hadn't met him. I groaned once I reached my own office and shut the door behind me, leaning into it as I tried, once again, to get a hold of myself.
I didn’t regret meeting Evan, not for a second, and there were so many good things that’d come of it. But this was a hell of a lot to ask anyone to deal with, and I was struggling.
I sighed and moved to my desk to pull out the sticky note where I’d scribbled the prison’s information. Might as well get it done.
“Hello, my name is Mariah Bailey,” I said when the call finally connected, my voice steady despite the turmoil within me. “I’d like to put my name on the waiting list for your next available visitation date.”
“Please hold while I check for you,” the woman said, her voice just as distant and impersonal as the last time.
While I waited, I stared at the framed photograph of Evan, Sofia, and me sitting on the table by the window. I’d taken it at a petting zoo, back before Evan and I had truly gotten together. Back when I was just the nanny. Even then, I could see the spark in our eyes as we sat together with Sofia on our laps, smiling for the camera. We looked so happy, so carefree in that moment. The memory felt like a lifetime ago, before Tomas Hawthorne turned our world upside down.
“Ms. Bailey?” The operator's voice pulled me back to the present. “Your name is on the list. You're cleared for visitation.” My dragon settled down, sensing the small victory, but the storm of emotions still churned inside.
The moment I hung up the phone, I heard Sofia's cries ringing out, announcing she’d woken from her nap. Shaking off the lingering resentment, and giving my dragon a silent warning, I hurried to the nursery.
“Hey there, little dragon,” I said softly as I opened the door, finding Sofia sitting up in her crib, her face red and streaked with tears. “How did you sleep?”
“Mama,” she whimpered, her voice thick from slumber as she reached out.
I scooped her up, pressing the warmth of her body against mine while I wiped her cheeks. Her little sigh as she rested her head on my shoulder and clung to my shirt tugged at my heartstrings.
“It’s okay. Mama's here,” I whispered, gently rocking her in my arms. My heart filled with warmth at the name, and a smile curved my lips. These moments right here. These were what it was all about. I’d dreamed of this life for so long. The family I’d always wanted might not have come about the way I’d expected, or ever could have imagined, but it was mine, and I loved them, including this new life growing inside me.
“Let's get you changed,” I said, laying her on the changing table.
With practiced efficiency, I changed Sofia's diaper, distracting her with silly faces and tickles. She giggled, and by the time she was clean and dry, there was no hint that she’d ever woken up teary.
“There we go, all better. Now, let’s go down and get dinner started.”
I carried her into the kitchen, her tiny hands clinging to my shirt once again. Bending my head, I breathed her in, pressing a kiss to the top of her auburn curls. Sofia curled into me, letting out a sweet, little contented sound, and my dragon gently pushed against my consciousness. A presence that wasn’t dominating or controlling, but simply…content, too?
Yes, that’s what it was. When I really paid attention, it seemed as if my dragon was purring in delight as I cuddled Sofia in my arms. Rumbling warmth bloomed in my chest, pulsing through me, burning like a bright, steady flame of love for this precious child. My dragon and I felt it as one, an instinctive vow to protect what was ours. A tail-like tendril of heat wrapped around my abdomen, encircling the new life growing within.
And for the first time since I’d been turned, I felt completely at peace.
