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This was going to be a mess. With everything else going on with Tomas, and the investigation that was underway with the FBI, our situation was extremely delicate. It had to be handled with care. There were real world consequences for killing, regardless of if we were human or dragon.
I turned back to my mate. She was staring down at the body of the man. Blood covered his destroyed neck, and his eyes were still open, staring lifelessly into the sky.
A maelstrom of emotions ripped through her, taking my breath away with their intensity. I couldn’t identify one from the next as they flashed in rapid succession. Still, she stared at the body. Mariah hadn’t even returned to human form, and perhaps she didn’t know how. Or the trauma of it had left her in shock.
“Mariah,” I said, my voice strong and commanding, loud enough to get her attention. She turned her long neck, and her glassy eyes met mine as she lowered her head. Horror, sadness, fear, and shock coursed through her in equal measure.
“It’s okay, baby,” I told her, reaching up to touch her neck, my fingers sliding over the smoothness of her emerald scales. The light reflected off them, giving her a glowing aura that was magnificent to behold. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You were protecting yourself and the baby. Protecting me. It’s okay.” But the look in her eyes had my chest tightening painfully. I couldn’t bear to see her this way. “Come on, you need to shift back.”
Jax’s voice reached me from where he stood by the car. “Matthew said he’ll handle it. He said to get out of here. Come on. We need to go before someone comes along and spots us.”
“You can do it, Mariah.” I kept my gaze locked on hers. She lowered her head more, and I ran my fingers up her neck to her jaw, gently holding her as the emotions threatened to overwhelm us both.
A rumble sounded in her chest, resulting in a huff of hot breath on my face. My dragon reared up at the sound, reacting to his mate in a way that was entirely inappropriate at the moment. I chuckled as the word echoed in my head.
Mate, mate, mate.
Yes, I told him. She is.
He pushed against my consciousness, demanding to be let loose again, wanting to be back in the same form as her, and wanting to claim her as a dragon, but I pushed back.
Soon.
There’d be plenty of time, but Jax was right. We needed to get the hell out of here before someone passed by and saw two dead bodies on the ground.
“You’ve got this,” I whispered, staring into her beautiful eyes. “Just remember what we’ve practiced. Deep breaths. Visualize yourself in human form.”
She closed her eyes in concentration, but nothing happened for several long minutes. I was starting to worry, wondering what our backup plan would be if I couldn’t help her shift back quickly enough.
“Come on,” I urged, stroking her scales. “I need to hold you in my arms. To see that you’re okay. Please.”
She took a massive breath, letting it out so hard that my hair blew back from my face. But in the next moment, she was shrinking, her scales receding, her wings and fangs and claws retracting. She shuddered once, then she was in human form again, falling into my arms as her strength gave out.
I lifted and cradled her to my chest as I strode to the car. Her heart was racing as she whimpered, burying herself against me. And then she spoke, the agony in her voice ripping my heart to shreds as her muffled words reached my ears.
“I just killed a man.”
Chapter 24
Mariah
The bitter, coppery tang of blood lingered in the air and on my tongue, making my stomach churn as I stared blankly out the window, with the image of the lifeless body sprawled on the ground permanently etched into my mind.
Evan had parked the car out of sight until Matthew’s team arrived on the scene. He and Jax were talking with Matthew now. I remained in the car, unable to even consider the idea of going back out there again where I might see what I’d done. What could never be undone.
I’d killed a man.
My hands trembled as I recalled the pure rage that’d coursed through me, the bloodlust for anyone and anything who threatened my family. Sofia had fallen back asleep, oblivious to the horrors around her.
Even now, I could feel it: the hot, wet blood that'd exploded in my mouth when I’d ripped a man’s throat right out of his body. I shuddered, still unable to believe I’d done such a thing. Even worse was the absolute knowledge that I’d do it all over again to protect my family. To protect my babies. To keep myself out of Tomas’s clutches.
Evan's strong arms had been the only thing that’d kept me from falling to pieces when I’d shifted back, though I thought I was now going into shock. Everything felt numb, from my cold, clammy hands to my calming heart. I didn’t want to think about it, afraid of the emotions that would come along with the recognition of what I’d done, but I couldn’t not think about it.
“Everything's going to be okay, Mariah,” Evan said when he came back to the car, with Jax right on his heels.
His words did little to quell the storm raging inside me. How would we explain what happened? What if this brought more danger to our doorstep? My thoughts raced, colliding with one another in a chaotic mess. The FBI was here, and I’d committed murder. Granted, it was in self-defense, but still.
“Mariah?” I blinked, realizing that Matthew was standing beside them, his eyes filled with concern. “I’ll handle all of this. You don’t need to worry. Evan, go ahead and take Mariah home. I can call you if I need any other information.”
