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“I think as long as I can hold you like this, I’ll sleep like a baby.”
“Mmm,” I murmured, eyelids already getting heavy. “I think such an arrangement would work just fine for me.”
“Then it sounds like we have a deal.”
He kissed the back of my head once again, and I was asleep no more than a few minutes later.
* * *
I felt like I was on a field trip when we arrived at the clinic the following day. We’d made the long drive down the mountainside in the early morning, watching as the sun came up and lit up the sky in shades of pink and lavender. It was nice to see the ocean from that angle, to watch as the morning waves caught the glint of the sleepy sun.
It had taken about five cars in all to get everyone down to the clinic. The handful of people from the Georgia Pack, along with our own pack members who needed the gene therapy, were all in tow, plus a few of their loved ones coming along for moral support. My stomach couldn’t decide if it wanted to be calm or queasy. My brain couldn’t decide if it was scared or excited. All I knew was that it’d taken me forever to get here, and I wasn’t about to back down or turn tail.
Along with my own conflicted feelings, I could sense Cole’s worry and agitation. I could tell that he was barely keeping his emotions under control. He had the good grace to show me only the strong, calm parts of himself, periodically looking over at me and smiling encouragingly as we drove. But we were mates, and I could feel his nervous apprehension.
Once we arrived and Cole stopped the car, he sat there for a few moments, watching as others got out of their car and started gathering. The group chit-chatted and looked over at us through the windshield once in a while. Cole had his eyes angled down toward the dashboard, and I couldn’t tell if he was lost in thought or purposefully avoiding the onlookers’ gaze.
“Cole?” I said gently. “Are you alright?”
He smeared his hand down the front of his face before cupping his hand over his mouth and chin. His jaw stiffened as he clenched his teeth. “I’m trying to be,” he said. “But honestly, I feel like I want to throw this truck into high gear and speed right out of town so I don’t have to face the likelihood of something terrible happening to you.”
“The doctor said the risks are low, even with the risk factors I have,” I pointed out.
“He said they were low, but that a complication could be catastrophic,” he countered.
“Yes, the same way that any complication could be catastrophic for any gene therapy patient,” I rebuffed. “Cole, we have to go into this hoping for the best.”
“Believe me, I am,” he said, not unkindly. He dropped his hands into his lap and sighed, resting the back of his head against his headrest and closing his eyes. “I’m hoping for the best. It’s just hard not to think that everything that can go wrong will go wrong. It’s hard not to hold my breath.”
“That’s more than understandable with the way the last few months have gone,” I said sympathetically, reaching over to take one of his hands. “I’m having a hard time not feeling that fear, too. Not waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
He nodded and looked over at me, his eyes weary. “Are you certain you want this?”
“I am,” I promised him. “And I think deep down, you really want it, too.”
His gaze stayed on me for a little while longer before he looked down at where our hands met, giving mine a little squeeze. “You’re right,” he said. “Not that I wouldn’t accept you for everything you currently are. I adore every part of you…but it’s hard to deny the appeal of the idea of getting to run free with you in the forests and snuggle up with you beneath the stars in our lycan forms. I’m just…I’m terrified.”
“You and me both,” I said, giving his hand another squeeze. “But we’ll get through this just like we have gotten through everything else—together.”
He nodded. “Together,” he agreed.
“So,” I said, smiling at him. “Shall we?”
“No time like the present.”
We got out of the car and walked the few feet to join the others. They welcomed us with the same warmth you might expect at a family cookout, giving us hugs and hellos as if we hadn’t just seen each other back at headquarters.
It was strange, but it was nice, too. It was nice to feel like I belonged to a family.
We all wandered into the clinic, which had been closed to the general public so that the doctor and his team could focus on us. There was a lot that could go wrong, and ensuring that the entire office was coordinating on a single task would mitigate the chances of a disaster.
“Ah, the gang’s all here!” the doctor greeted us as we entered the waiting room in a sleek, modern-looking office. There were a handful of other doctors and nurses, more than I was used to seeing. I assumed he’d called in some colleagues to help since his office was usually just him and a few nurses. “Can I borrow Mr. and Mrs. Lucas for a quick private chat before we get started?”
“Oh, of course,” I said immediately.
“Where are we going, doc?” Cole chimed in.
“Exam room three, if you don’t mind,” he said. “I’ll be in there in just a moment. Just want to make sure we get everyone checked in smoothly and get the last few emergency contacts we’re missing.”
