Page 32 of Icing It

Hockey basically disrupted my family.

It stole my parents from me.

There I said it.

It wasn't that my parents weren't loving. I always knew they loved and supported me. But my interests were a lot quieter and easier and could be handled by other people. I loved to bake, cook, and read, so my parents found me pretty easy to leave behind.

Thank God.

My younger years were spent in the stands surrounding ice rinks. When I got a little older, they were able to leave me with my grandparents. That was a lot more fun. It's where my love and talent for baking came from. It turned into my career and I can't be upset about that.

Still, I can resent hockey.

"Oh my God, Luna, these are fucking amazing." Blake Wilder bursts into the kitchen and scoops up a huge handful of macarons. He shoves three in his mouth at a time — they're not even all three the same flavor — and gives me a grin. "Crew’s a lucky motherfucker."

Then he stomps back out of the kitchen.

He doesn’t mean to stomp, but he’s a huge hockey player with gigantic feet and that's just how he walks.

It’s how they all fucking walk. My parent’s house is noisy, crowded, and chaotic today because all of my brother's hockey friends—current and past—are here to celebrate the day of his birth.

Including Alexsei Ryan.

I know he's here. I saw him walk in. And I immediately ducked into the kitchen then, too.

I've seen him, of course, since our wild weekend. But I see him while I sit in the seats in the arena and he skates around the ice. Looking fierce, powerful, cocky, and amazing.

I thought the guy was good-looking before. I thought he seemed fun and easygoing.

But now? Now that I've had his hands and mouth on me? Now that I've had his cock inside me? Now that I've had his dirty talk in my ears? Now I can't watch him skate around an ice rink without starting to sweat.

He was also a lot of fun. Sweet, considerate, making me laugh as he cuddled me on the couch and smothered me with kisses. Reminding me that I’ve been lonely, especially since Dani now spends just about every night with one or all of her men. I can’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, it wouldn’t be a bad thing to date Alexsei Ryan. He’s on the road a lot, he’s affable, accommodating. Good God, is he accommodating. I fan myself in the stuffy kitchen.

But I haven't actually talked to him since that night. I've been avoiding the back hallway where the WAGS all gather after games.

I haven't been able to avoid Cam, of course. He still sits behind me at the games. But ever since our weird stare down after he told me that was the last time he was asking me to come home with them…well, he meant it. He’s behind me, a brooding, smoldering presence that I swear makes the back of my neck actually heat up a few degrees, but we haven’t talked. Which is disappointing. Which is confusing.

Still, as soon as I saw Alexsei walk into my parents’ house, Cam’s voice was in my head.

Alexsei's a great guy. What the fuck is wrong with you?

I don't know what's wrong with me. Maybe I'm trying to run a business. Maybe I'm trying to be a modern, independent woman. Maybe I don't really fucking like hockey and I don't want to date a hockey player. Maybe I’m scared that I do actually want to date Alexsei and what that could mean moving forward in my life.

And by the way, Alexsei hasn't called me. He hasn't sought me out after any games. He hasn’t shown up at my apartment or my bakery. None of that information would be hard to get if he really wanted it. My brother might give it to him. Even more likely, my best friend, the sweetest woman on earth and constant presence in that back hallway after games, would give it to him.

But he hasn't pursued me. So I have to assume that our three-day fling was a one-time three-day fling. Which is perfect. Just what I wanted.

Then.

Now? I don’t know. Having someone respect your space and boundaries is awesome. It says amazing things about Alexsei’s character. But… I haven’t had sex since I was with those two. I’m still stressed. I’m lonely. And I’m starting to think being a workaholic is slightly overrated.

But I decide to stay in the kitchen, anyway.

I’m not hiding out from Alexsei and my jumbled thoughts and feelings. I’m making sure the desserts that I made for my brother's birthday are perfect.

Of course they are. I'm an amazing baker and baking for my family and a bunch of hungry hockey guys who barely chew macarons before they just swallow them is super easy.

"Hey, Luna."

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