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Angel looked off into the distance for a moment, and I could see the gears turning in her head as she slowly sipped at her glass of water. "Everyone processes trauma differently. I dealt with the trauma of my ex by trying to move on, put him in the past, ignoring him and lived in a weird state of denial for the longest while. Hanna… She… How do I put this…"
Sighing heavily, Angel ran a hand across her jaw and rested it there in thought. "Hanna copes by disassociating or regressing, mainly, but the main thing is her memory itself of everything. Sometimes people concoct stories to fit their narratives. Hanna's the type to refuse to be a victim, which is why she's overly confident and expressive, to mask her insecurities and basically trick herself. Fake it until you make it basically. But sorry, I lost track, the memories, her memories. I don't want to say much because like I said before, it's her story to tell, but it's obvious she won't tell you the whole story because she can't."
"Can't or won't?" I pressed quizzically.
"It's a strange mixture of both because to Hanna, the story she tells you is the truth to her and her mind. She's grown comfortable with her own lie of the events to where it's what she believes to have happened. Yes, she was forced into a brothel by her mother and Lilian, her aunt. Yes, she was subjected to the stuff of the devil's nightmares in the place. And yes, a fire burnt the place down. My father found out about the place because of the fire and took Hanna in afterwards and exiled her mother who took the blame for everything to leave Lilian to run her business with the triad still." Even though she finished speaking, I couldn't help but feel something amiss.
"But?" I pressed sternly, not liking to be kept in the dark if there was information amiss.
"But the way Hanna presents it is a little skewed… In her version, there's always a little girl with her, her friend in the place. We searched the whole place from underground and up, combed through every bit of ash, and we found no trace of this girl who died in the fire. We accounted for everyone dead and alive, and when we questioned the bastards who were regulars with Hanna, they told us there was never any other girl. The girl never existed, at least not to us or anyone else but Hanna."
Oh Hanna, I'm going to make this right.
Chapter 36
Hanna
"Hanna!"
I startled with a jump when a pair of hands grabbed at my shoulders and pulled me away from the stove.
Zoning back in, I took notice of my wet hands. "Malenkaya, you were going to burn yourself." Stepan sighed with a concerned look. "Go sit down on the couch with your wolf, I'll finish dinner up."
"I'm sorry." I mumbled with a hung head as I handed him the handful of spaghetti noodles I'd planned on putting into the boiling pot of water.
Sweetly, he held me tightly and kissed my forehead. "I'm sorry for yelling at you, but you weren't responding the first few times I called your name, and you were holding your hand too close to the water. I'm not mad at you or anything, just worried about how distracted you are." He spoke against my temple before placing a kiss there.
"If you wanted me out of the kitchen then you just had to say so." I joked dryly, forcing myself to chuckle painfully.
"Hanna, I know how your cooking skills are, and I really appreciate you wanting to make dinner for us tonight, but you really are too distracted. You nearly cut yourself too many times earlier with chopping up the veggies for the salad, and now the boiling water. Let me take care of it, alright? Go decompress on the couch, turn on a show, I'll bring the food out once it's done," he said with a nod towards the couch in the living room that was in clear view from the kitchen thanks to the open floor plan of the house.
"Malenkaya." His urging tone became stern when he noticed me lingering and debating. "I know you wanted to make dinner, maybe tomorrow okay?"
Sighing in defeat, I nodded softly before turning my head to give him a quick kiss. "Can you eat me out later, Daddy?" Don't know why I got a little shy asking him as if he doesn't try to shove his head between my legs nearly every damn morning and night.
His chest shook with his chuckle. "I was gonna eat you out regardless for dessert." He whispered hotly in my ear, making me shiver with excitement. "Now go be a good girl on the couch." His hand gave my bottom a few firm pats before he turned his attention away from me.
Cheekily smirking, I gave Stepan's delicious ass a quick swipe, giggling and running away before Stepan could grab me. Going over to the couch, I tuck myself comfortably onto the soft leather sectional and hug my giant stuffed wolf that Stepan got me for when he'd have to leave me alone; he even sacrificed—unwillingly—one of his shirts for me to put on it so his scent would be present.
"I swear, sometimes you love that thing more than me." Stepan joked with a chuckle from the kitchen, making me look over to see his jealous eyes.
Snickering playfully, I stick my tongue out at him before grabbing the remote to turn the TV onto Criminal Minds. Moments like these were so lovely, and I only wished our lives could be more like this. To come home from the office to the comfort of home life. "Hon? Do you ever think about leaving the bratva life behind?"
"Do you want me to?" He responded with a question.
Keeping my attention trained on the TV, I hummed softly in thought before answering him, "No. Well, not fully… I don't know why I asked, it's stupid." He'd never leave his brothers high and dry. Even if Nikolai didn't force his brothers to partake in the bratva, they all chose to be involved because of their respect and love for their older brother.
Stepan doesn't particularly care for the family business much, but he has made his wishes for a normal-ish life known occasionally. I don't blame him because I was the same. I never cared for my future much until Stepan happened to it. Now, I had us to think about, as strange of a notion it was.
"This won't last long, tigress. Once everything is sorted out then it'll be smooth sailing again." Stepan assured me confidently.
Merges were always messy, and not everyone under triad command was too keen on coming under the rule of the Volkov Bratva when Angel made the announcement. Lev and I, along with most of the other enforcers, had been dealing with those unwilling to cooperate with our fists while Stepan and the rest of his brothers handled the business side of things.
"I know… I'm just tired."
A lot more than usual.
"Oh fuck, Daddy! Coming!" Again, for the hundredth time, it felt like.
