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PROLOGUE
Riley
The skies are empty, without any stars. And here I am, standing on a hill of misery of my own making.
The night is cold and it reminds me of how heartbreak feels. Because you see, the thing about love and heartbreak is that they are beyond similar, yet also dissimilar. They both collide into your life, so unexpectedly, it leaves you breathless. For two very different reasons.
Breathless in love.
Breathless in agony.
It’s weird when I think about it now.
I fell in love when I was too young to understand what it really meant. The feeling that made me all giddy and fuzzy inside, had my stomach in permanent knots — but it was an exquisite feeling.
And then I was met with heartbreak: ugly and bitter.
It was unexpected, just like when he came into my life.
But the thing about young love and first love is that you never truly forget it. He burrowed himself into my bones, into the marrow of me — even when I tried so hard to erase every part of him from my life. He was there, unwavering. Under my skin, huddled in a deep, dark corner of my heart.
The second time I fell in love, it was just as unforeseen. He was everything that I knew was bad for me; yet, he was there. Like a shadow following me, like the starry sky holding the clouds away. He sheltered my soul from the storm of grief that threatened to consume my miserable life.
All epic love stories have two things in common: havoc and anguish. They all need a catalyst of some sort.
That catastrophic moment for me was when my first love and my second chance collided. Now, the three of us are entangled in a web of broken promises, unspoken vows and devastating oaths.
The thing about loving two men is that it will always end in… heartbreak and tragedy. Maybe for all of us.
CHAPTER ONE
Riley — 16 years old (Sophomore year)
The moment Jasper rolls over, I practically jump off the bed and blindly grab for my jeans. This isn’t what I was expecting, or thought it would be like.
Every girl dreams for their first sexual experience to be romantic and special, right? Okay, fine. It doesn’t have to be romantic or special. Those things are reserved for books and movies, apparently. But at least the sex is supposed to make you feel good.
This was just…disappointing and painful.
“So, happy birthday?” Jasper says, his words laced with amusement. “Give me another minute, and I’ll be ready for another round.”
Another round? What? It feels like my whole downstairs area is on fire, and he wants to go again?
“I’m a little sore,” I respond begrudgingly.
He turns on his side, regarding me with a lewd smile. “Yeah? Well, the first time is supposed to hurt anyway.”
It’s only supposed to hurt this much if I’m not fully prepared, which means that Jasper didn’t even bother making sure that I was ready for him. Sure, this was my first time, but I’m not completely uneducated on the matter.
I read romance books; I watch porn — so I knew what to expect.
My thighs rub together, and I wince at the painful twinge that comes with the friction. I so did not imagine my birthday sex would end up like this. Once I’m dressed, I grab my wallet and phone. “Do you mind driving me home?”
His eyebrows furrow in confusion. “Home? I thought we were spending the day together.”
Jasper convinced me to skip school today. It’s my first time missing class since the academic year started. But he coerced until I relented. It’s your birthday. I planned something special for you.
His something special was this — bringing me to his parents’ cabin and birthday sex.Takin my virginity was his birthday present to me.
