Page 26 of Keep Breathing


Font Size:  

I picked up my hairbrush and moved over to the mirror, wiping away the steam so I could see my reflection – not that I really wanted to see it.

I hated the girl who looked back at me in the mirror now. I barely recognized her anymore. I had lost so much weight, and not in a good way. I liked the way I looked before. I had curves and muscle. I had a body I wasn’t ashamed of, but now most of my muscle was gone, as were my curves. My face looked gaunt and pale, and the dark smudges under my eyes were more and more prominent each time I looked at myself. My hair was no longer shining and bright – it was dull and lifeless, too long and in need of a good cut.

Then I looked down, the mirror now clearing of steam, and caught sight of the scars that marked my stomach. Deep lines, still a little red and angry around the edges, the cuts jagged and ugly. They marred almost the entire area, and several ran up between my breasts. I knew they would never disappear. The cuts had been too deep. Those scars would be with me forever – a daily reminder of what Soloman had done to me.

Tears were silently running down my face as I stood frozen just staring at them all. I turned enough to glance at my back and saw even more there – these ones a mix of cuts and burns – all the result of Soloman’s attempts to cause enough pain that I would beg for my end

The flashbacks started to come then, and I knew I had to stop before I lost control. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes tight to stop any more tears from following. I had already had a full on break down the day before with Harris and his buds. I couldn’t let that happen again. I had to try harder to keep it together.

I moved quickly in an attempt to stop myself from thinking anymore, scraping my hair up into a messy knot on top of my head, then pulling on the leggings and sweater I had gotten out, the whole time refusing to see my reflection again.

I tidied the bathroom behind me, making sure everything was just as I found it, then I went out to the bedroom and did the same in there, attempting to make the bed look as perfect as it had been when I found it. When I had everything packed back into my backpack, I threw it over my shoulder and quietly crept from the room, not wanting to wake anyone else. It was still early and I was sure they would all still be asleep.

The house was perfectly silent as I tiptoed down the stairs. It was toasty warm underfoot when I stepped off of the last step and I realized there was underfloor heating. It felt so good on my bare feet and I wondered how weird it would be if I just laid out on it, right there at the foot of the stairs. Hmm? That did sound like a good idea. Maybe later. I needed coffee first.

I headed for the kitchen, the light coming in from outside as the sun slowly rose enough for me to see where I was going, which was good because I had no idea where the light switch would be.

“Good morning,” a deep voice said as I caught movement off to my right. I leapt back instinctively as my heart leapt to my throat in fear, a squeak escaping me. Without thought I dropped my bag and loosened my fists at my sides, ready to fight just the way I had been taught, all before I realized it was just Kailan. He had obviously been sat at the dining table, working, by the look of the stack of papers and his laptop open, and he had stood to greet me.

“Fuck!” I gasped as I slammed a hand over my rapidly beating heart to try and calm it. “You scared the stuffing out of me!”

“Sorry,” he said as he held his hands out before him, like he was surrendering. “I didn’t…I thought you’d seen me,” he stuttered.

“It’s okay,” I sighed as I tried to force myself to relax a little. “It’s not you. It’s me. I guess I’m kinda jumpy right now.” I bent to grab my backpack from where I had dropped it to the floor.

“Are you alright? I didn’t mean to scare you,” he added as he took his seat again, but watched my every move.

“I’m good,” I nodded. “I guess you’re an early riser, huh?” I moved over to the kitchen and leant awkwardly against the edge of the counter, not feeling entirely comfortable being alone with Kailan.

“Not usually but I couldn’t sleep. Thought I’d get some work done,” he explained. “I made coffee if you want some. It’s in the pot.” He nodded towards the kitchen.

“You read my mind.” I sent him a grateful smile, then dropped my backpack to the ground beside one of the stools at the island, before rounding the counter in search of sugary caffeinated goodness.

“How did you sleep? Was the room okay?” he asked as he got to his feet and came closer. I paused to watch him as he approached, my entire body tightening with anxiety as he got closer and closer, but then he stopped at the counter and took a seat on one of the stools there, leaving the island between us.

“I, uh….I slept better than I have in a while,” I stuttered as I tried to force myself to relax and go back to the task at hand. He wasn’t coming any closer. That much was obvious.

“That’s good,” he nodded.

“I think the scotch helped,” I laughed as I looked to the hundreds of cabinets for a mug.

“Cups are to your right, at the end,” Kailan told me. I sent him another weak smile, as I reached up to grab one while keeping an eye on him too. “Sugar is next to the coffee machine and there’s creamer in the refrigerator.”

“Thanks. You want some?” I offered as I held up the pot.

“No. I’m good thanks. I already had three cups,” he chuckled.

I made my coffee just how I liked it, with sugar and some of the vanilla creamer I found in the refrigerator, then leant back against the counter, not feeling comfortable with rounding it to sit beside him.

“So what is it you do?” I asked as I nodded to where he had been working at the table.

“Harris, Aleks, and I are all in business together. We have a security company. Aleks does security software and I.T. security solutions. Harris and I deal with security systems, and security personnel for clubs and bars in the area. It’s all one company, and it seems to be working pretty well for now,” he shrugged.

“And Nick? He’s not part of the business?” I asked.

“Nah. Nick does his own thing. Always has. He’s a cop. Detective actually.”

Panic filled me as my heart started to pound hard in my chest. He was a cop? And he had been there when I told them everything the day before. I was screwed.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com