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“Not just any chocolates,” I clarified. “Handmade chocolates from that little place in the city. I made you work for my forgiveness.” I reminded him happily.
“Simpler times, huh?” he laughed.
“Definitely,” I agreed. We had both been so young and carefree back then, before Harris’s father was killed. We had been so naïve and happy, filled with hopes and dreams and so in love with each other. Since then everything had changed, except maybe one, I realized as I stared into Harris’s captivating eyes. I still had feelings for him. There was no denying that to myself. I always had. It was just so typical of me to realize that when I was too messed up to do anything about it.
CHAPTER 16
EVIE
Later that day I was laid on the sofa in the living room, watching a movie Harris had put on for me.
After we ate the delicious pancakes Nick had cooked for us, I had felt wiped out. Telling the guys everything had been more emotionally draining than I realized it would be. Add on to that the fact I was feeling achy and sore, and I was exhausted.
Harris had, of course, noticed right away and suggested I lay down and watch a movie while they got to work on what they had. Nick had called in to the station, resolved to stay home for the day and work on what I had told them.
Too tired to argue, I had done my part to help – showing them on a map on the computer where I thought Soloman had left me just outside of Boston – then agreed to lie down. Sometime around John McClane killing a helicopter with a car in the movie, I had started to doze off, feeling warmed by the fire Kailan had lit for me, and safe with the guys close by in the kitchen.
I slept peacefully at first but, before long, my dreams had morphed into nightmares, taking me back there. Back to him.
“Say it! Ask me to make this all stop, Eight!” he roars as he lifts me from the cold tile of the bathroom floor and up into the air. My abdomen throbs angrily with agonizing pain, and when I move my hand to it in panic, I feel the warm heat of blood. I know this day. I have already lived it. It’s the last day.
I scream as my body touches the ice cold water in the tub, then regret it instantly when water fills my mouth as he pushes me violently under the water, holding me at the bottom of the tub as I fight with everything I have, clawing at his hand around my throat and kicking wildly, just fighting to get up and breathe before he kills me.
He raises me for a little more than one breath before dunking me right back under, twice more. By the time he lifts me out completely and throws me to the cold ground, I’m almost unconscious. I cling to the small speck of life still within me by picturing my parents, by brothers, Livy, and the rest of my family one after the other. I cling to their images to give me the strength not to give into him and just make it all stop. I can’t give up. I won’t!
“K-Kyle, Kade, Cole, M-Matt, Mom, Dad….Daddy,” I’m whispering their names over and over again as pain throbs throughout my entire body, making me spaced and fuzzy. I just want my Dad to scoop me up and make it all better, like he used to when I was little and I’d fall over in the garden, or at the park.
“W-what did you say?” I think I can hear Soloman asking me, but that can’t be right. He doesn’t speak to me. Not unless it’s to yell at me to say those words I refuse to say.
“Livy, Xander….Xander, make it stop,” I whimper as I continue listing my family. Xander will make the pain stop. He always does. He’s my oldest brother and he has always taken care of me. They all have. I wish they were here to make it stop now.
“Shut up!” Soloman hisses, then he’s picking me up again and dunking me into the tub. The panic and adrenaline surge through me again as I fight to get out of the water. I fight and claw, but nothing releases his grip on my throat. Nothing can make it stop. Only me, and I refuse to do that.
“Evie, wake up for me, darlin,’” Kailan’s slight Texas twang wakes me. I snap my eyes open and look around. He was stood back, giving me space, and looking worried. “Hey. You were having a bad dream. You with me?” he asked gently, and I knew he was worried I’d flip out like I had before.
I looked around and found the others still at the counter in the kitchen, all three of them watching Kailan and I, ready to run and grab me if I ran again.
“Yeah,” I gasped. I was out of breath and shaking, but I knew where I was this time. “I’m good. Sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry for. You okay?” he asked as he came closer and sat gingerly on the sofa beside me. “Take some deep breaths and try to slow your breathing, okay?” he encouraged. I sat up, swinging my legs from the seat until I was seated beside him. I nodded and tried to take deeper breaths, balling my trembling hands into fists to try and still them. I was relieved when Kailan wrapped his arm around my back and pulled me into his side. I felt cold all of a sudden and the heat of his body was comforting. He was wearing a red hooded sweater that felt so soft under my cheek where I lay it against his shoulder.
“At least I d-didn’t attack any of you today, huh?” I laughed breathlessly after several minutes. “That’s progress, right?”
“We’ll take it,” Harris chuckled from the kitchen.
“Better than taking the ass kicking she gave you before, huh?” Nick added, making me laugh a little.
“Are you hungry, Evie? We ate lunch while you were sleeping but I can make you something?” Aleks offered. I sat up and looked over to him with a smile. He was dressed now, in black, slim fitting jeans and a navy blue sweater that accentuated his toned upper body. His hair was styled neatly too. He was the epitome of nerdy and handsome in his glasses and all of my earlier panic ebbed as I swooned slightly.
“Maybe something small, if you’re sure you don’t mind?” I replied. Slowly but surely, being with them was giving me back my appetite and I had been able to eat several times now without feeling ill after the first bite. I was pretty sure it was because they made me feel safe enough to relax somewhat, but whatever it was, I was grateful for it.
“Coming right up,” he agreed with a smile before he headed for the refrigerator.
“Did you guys find anything?” I asked, looking to Harris and Nick.
“We’re looking at traffic cams around where you said you were left. Can you pinpoint the time anymore?” Harris asked.
“Not really. I think it was late evening because I remember it getting dark not long after I checked into the motel, but I’m really not sure how long I was walking. I wasn’t thinking straight. I think I was kind of in shock,” I explained.
