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I stay quiet, not wanting to give myself away. I can act like I am still asleep, dreaming of our mating instead of facing the impending argument that is no doubt going to happen between me and Nyx. The fated love for us is doomed, a match made to be stricken and lit just to watch two hearts burn.
“I know you are awake, Cailian,” he says again, his frustrated voice cutting through the silence. “I feel your emotions coursing through me. Although unwelcome—” he turns his head just enough where I can appreciate the sculpted jawline “—Your awareness of me feels good.”
“Although unwelcome,” I remind him, kissing Rarity’s forehead.
I have become a senseless, lovestruck fool for her. I get to fall in love with countless versions of her soul for all eternity and I am curious how many versions of her I will meet. She will never be the same as she is right now, curious and afraid, a little wide-eyed when it comes to the world she does not know. Soon, she will be well-taught and experienced, taking the world for herself. Rarity is strong, but she has not unlocked the true power within herself.
I cannot wait to witness that. I am lucky to know I will be at her side for all her adventures. Nyx on the other hand, counting on him to stay is slim. All we can do is hope he will.
“Unwelcome indeed.”
Silence falls again, tension as tight as a rope that is about to snap. Nyx stays seated, his head hanging, his feelings a confusing mess of webs that are tangled and knotted. I try to decipher one thought he is transmitting, yet as his arm pulses with winter across his tattoo, his mind is a blizzard all on its own. I am unable to understand what he is feeling at all.
Kissing Rarity one more time on her forehead, I slowly move from under her arm. The bed barely moves from how quick and light I am on my feet. Soon I am standing without waking her up. Studying my sweet mate, I wonder if anything can wake her up. She takes the opportunity for free space and sprawls out on the bed, taking my side. Rarity snags my pillow and pulls it to her chest. Her cheek is smashed against it causing her lips to squish together and drool begins to spill from her lower lip.
A graceful sleeper she is not.
“I don’t want to turn into pizza,” she mumbles, clutching the blanket to her chest as she gives us a bit of what she is dreaming about. “Dip me in blood? Blood dip… sounds… good.” She trails off into a whisper before a light snore puffs from her.
I am at the foot of the bed, nearly next to Nyx, and place my hand on the footboard. “I wonder what blood dip is made of. Perhaps—” I take a step closer to him, wanting nothing more than to reach out and touch him.
Yet his hesitancy strums the cords of our bond, so I do not dare take another step.
“—Perhaps we can make her this dip she craves with our blood.” I keep my voice low, not wanting to disrupt her. She needs her rest. Her entire life has changed. She is mated to two males who will love her, however only one from the pair will get the abundance of love from everyone while the other lives with half.
“Sure. Whatever My Darling Jewel wants, she will get,” Nyx replies, never bringing his eyes to mine.
“Just her?” I swallow, rubbing my palm across the edge of the footboard.
The moonlight illuminates the edges of his defined features while shadows play in the crevices allowing me to see how his jaw tenses.
“Do not ask me that.” He curls his fists on his thighs, pushing against them as he stands.
His wings tuck behind him, his tail swaying back and forth as he walks to the balcony.
Like the fool I am, I follow him, my secret on the tip of my tongue daring to spill free so I can have his acceptance, his love. The doors open automatically, sensing his royalty, and he steps outside to the cool Elementalu night. He leans against therailing, his long tail swishing back and forth as if it is flicking to the speed of his thoughts.
“I notice you do not sizzle anymore,” I blurt out of nowhere, trying to make conversation. “When you walk on the ice.”
“Oh,” he says dubiously, staring at the ground. “I didn’t.”
I try not to let those words get to me. He can act careless all he wants. The bond does not lie. I feel him inside me, a constant burn in an array of snow.
“We might be able to use our powers on one another now.” I stroll to him, mimicking his stance, and do not pretend to be interested in the beauty of the stars when I have the universe right beside me.
He hums, clasping his hands together while looking up at the sky. “I don’t want to use my flame on you, regardless of how I feel, I can’t have what I did to you happen again.”
I press my hand against his arm and frost takes over the tattooed flame that appeared after we all mated, freezing it mid sway.
“I guess that answers that,” I state simply, pulling my hand away reluctantly to give him his space.
“At least I know I can’t hurt you.”
“I did not realize you cared if you hurt me.”
“I shouldn’t care.” He turns to me, leaning his elbow against the railing, a roar above followed by a flash of light tells us a dragon just flew over. “I am doing my best to accept this situation. I can’t just move on from what you did. I don’t care if it was so long ago. You took something from me.”
“I never knew it would be the piece you would need in order to love me.” A sadness twists its way around every word I speak, a poisonous vine killing any hope I have for us ever so slowly. “I did not know Fate would give me you. I did not know that all these years, you were my mate. It makes sense, I suppose.”
