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Eli sighed heavily and gave a reluctant nod. "All right, kitten. For you, I'll listen."
"Thank you." Holly tugged him into her room, and they sat down on the bed. "Your mom gave me these while I was in the kitchen with Irena. Obviously, she wants you to read them. But it's what Irena said that made me think that you really should consider it."
"What did she say?"
"Before I get to that, you should know that your mom wrote you a letter. Irena says it was written a few years ago, but your mom never gave it to you. She probably doesn’t remember writing it. It was with the stack of letters. Have you seen her letter before?"
"No," he said, raising his eyebrows.
"Irena told me she's been upset about this for weeks, and that Katherine is searching for peace about this matter with you reading the letters and talking to your father. Your mom wants things... settled."
"She wants things settled before she dies, you mean," he said flatly, meeting her eyes. "Is that what Irena said?"
"She didn't say it like that," Holly said softly, putting her hand on top of his. "But it didn't take much to read between the lines."
"Jesus," he grumbled, rubbing his forehead. "No fucking pressure, right?"
"Eli, I promise, the last thing I want to do is pressure you," Holly assured him. "But I feel like you needed to know. If you aren't ready for the letters, then maybe start with your mom's letter to you."
"Yeah, well I'm not fucking ready for that either," he told her, his voice strangely devoid of emotion. "I don't know when I'll be ready. Or if I’ll ever be ready."
Holly squeezed his hand. "I know. There's a lot on your plate. And I'm sorry for bringing this up, but I didn't want to keep it from you."
"It's okay." Eli let out a heavy sigh. "My biological father's a criminal, Wilkes. I don't remember him, but I do remember my mom."
"Camilla," Holly murmured. "She was so beautiful. I saw her photo."
"Yeah, she was. And she worked way too hard trying to right all his wrongs. She fell asleep behind the wheel of her car going to her third goddamn job when I was a little kid. I didn't understand when they told me what had happened. Not really. I just knew my mom was never coming home."
Holly's heart broke for him. He'd been just a little boy, and to hear that news had to be devastating. "Eli, I'm so sorry."
"It was a long time ago. My father's sister and her husband adopted me. My aunt became my mother in every sense of the word. Sheismy mother."
"And you don't talk to your adopted father because he left your mother when she found out she had Alzheimer's, right?"
Eli shrugged. "That's one of the reasons. He was never into being a dad. He gave me his name and a place to live, but not much else. I never considered myself his kid because he never considered himself my dad. He was a miserable bastard."
"So, your real last name is Cross?"
"No, my real last name is Donnelley." He glanced over at her. "I've been Eli Donnelley since I was five years old. Even if my stepdad is an asshole, I don't want Troy Cross's last name because he's a bigger one."
Holly fell silent for a moment. "Do you hate your real father?"
"No. I don't hate him. I don't feel anything," he said, his voice growing cold. "I remember Camilla crying all the time after he'd gone to jail, and then she was never home because she had to work all the time. And then she had the car accident. Katherine felt so guilty about talking shit about Troy, but her words didn’t turn me against him. His actions did. All he ever did was send me those fucking letters. He didn't care one fucking bit about me."
"But, Eli, how can you know that?" she asked. "You didn't read his letters. How can you say he didn't care?"
"Because if he cared, he would have come to see me! He knew where I lived. He knew exactly where I was, Holly. But he never visited. He never fucking showed up for one hockey game, one birthday, one Christmas. What kind of father does that? A shitty one, that's what kind."
“Maybe he did and your mom wouldn’t let him see you.”
“I asked her about it, and she said that when she talked to him, he never mentioned coming for a visit.”
"I'm sorry about all this, Eli. For bringing it home to you."
"You've got nothing to be sorry about, kitten," he said brusquely, wiping his hands on his cargo shorts. He stood, then leaned over and kissed the top of her head. "I'm going to chill in the living room for a while. Maybe take a nap. I'm drained from practice."
"Eli, wait.”
