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N I N E T E E N
- Madeline -
As soon as I closed the door to my room, I did a happy dance. Just a little one. But there was no denying the spontaneous shimmy of my hips and the tight balling of my fists as they punched the air beside my ears.
This. Was. Happening.
One swig of Smirnoff Ice later and I was in full mood-setting mode, kicking my stray clothes under the bed, smoothing the covers, and turning on my soft bedside lamp. I changed into some little boy shorts and a sheer tank top, hoping the ensemble might elicit a rare smile from his perfect lips, and I began anticipating the weight of his blue eyes on my bare skin. Then I hurried to the closet, shoved it closed, and…heard a door on the other side of the apartment shut.
I peeked my head into the sitting room, surprised to find that all the lights had been turned off and he was gone. My eyes wandered over to his closed bedroom door and focused on the narrow strip of light streaming out from under it. What was he up to?
“Quinn?” I asked tentatively, but he didn’t answer. I grabbed my drink off the dresser and perched on the end of my bed, my high spirits deflating as I stared at my cracked door. It was so quiet I found myself holding my breath, straining to hear a noise that might signal his arrival, but the oppressive silence was only met with more of the same.
When I couldn’t take the suspense any longer, I marched across the apartment and stood outside his room, listening for signs of life. Had I done something wrong? I wanted to knock, wanted to ask him what the heck he was doing, but part of me feared I mightn’t like what he had to say. And as much as I wanted to run my fingers through his black hair, over the dips between his abs, and across the muscled flesh of his back, I didn’t want any of those things as much as I wanted to not get my feelings hurt.
Not after tonight. Not after everything had been so perfect. The whole evening was nothing short of a dream. And it was certainly nothing like my last dozen Tinder dates, the best of which ended with me going home alone and finding a packet of Easy Mac I’d forgotten I had.
But tonight’s outing with Quinn was like a gift. He made me forget about all the shit I ate this week, made me feel like I was more than just a cripplingly incompetent intern with unreasonable expectations and deficient intellect. He made me feel pretty and optimistic and light on my feet. It was the most like myself I’d felt in two years.
Shit.
Maybe he was right to shut himself in his room. Maybe I’d been too eager. Except he was the one who kissed me! He was the one who made me unravel on the countertop. Why he wouldn’t let me return the favor? Was he afraid things would be weird? Cause things weren’t weird until he disappeared on me.
“Quinn?” I raised a hand to knock on the door but thought better of it. “Can you at least let me know you’re okay?”
I heard my phone plink back in my room, but no sound came from the other side of Quinn’s door. When he didn’t answer, I went to see who was texting me at this hour. To my surprise, it was the tease across the hall.
“I’m sorry, Maddy. I can’t go through with this.”
My heart strangled in my chest, and a flurry of emotions shook my fingers as I typed. “Like tonight or ever?”
“Tonight,” he answered quickly.
I blinked at his message, wishing I felt more comforted by it. “Can you at least tell me why?” So I don’t lie awake all night wondering what I did wrong, what I did to turn you off?
“Because I need more than two minutes to think about this.”
Was he fucking with me right now? “You want to come think in my room?”
“No.”
That was all he said. No. Did I like him more than I realized? Why did this hurt so bad?
“Not because I don’t like you.”
I crossed my legs on the bed and grabbed my drink off the nightstand without taking my eyes off the screen.
“Because I do.”
“You have a weird way of showing it,” I fired off, my horniness suffocated by my annoyance.
“You’re worth the wait.”
I stared at his words, not knowing what to think. Sure, it was probably the nicest thing a guy had ever said to me, but that didn’t mean I approved of this bullshit. What were we waiting for anyway? For my brother to come back and spoil everything?
I gasped when the realization hit me. This was totally James’s fault. He was cockblocking me from across the fucking ocean! Damn him!
At the same time, it was kind of sweet that Quinn wanted to proceed with caution in light of his friendship with my brother. It was mostly frustrating, but it was sweet, too. Especially when I always believed he had neither feelings nor a conscience. But I was wrong about him. He had both. And even though his kisses alone were proof that he would’ve known exactly what to do if he’d followed me in here, he was trying to do the right thing by not taking advantage of me…even though I really, really wanted him to.
I dropped my eyes to his message again and smiled. Maybe I was worth the wait. Hell, maybe he was, too.
