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He scoffed.
“What?”
“Not only have you not used the lemon sauce that came with your lobster roll, but you seem to have completely forgotten that you ordered crab toasts and sweet potato fries.”
My face fell. “Holy shit. How have they not come yet?” I looked around for our waitress, ignoring the jibe about the lemon sauce, which was the real shock since I usually asked for extra halfway through my roll.
“Maybe you aren’t sleeping with her yet,” he said, thinking out loud. “That would explain why you’ve been acting like such a fucking bimbo.”
“Who says bimbo anymore?”
“Who wears mismatched cartoon socks?”
“What?” I stuck a foot out from under the dark wood table and yanked up the pant leg on my suit, revealing my Timon and Pumbaa Hakuna Matata socks. When I checked the other foot, I saw the same. “They match.” I looked up to find him smiling like the cat who got the cream. “You’re an asshole.”
He shrugged. “Couldn’t help myself.”
I sighed and shook my head at him before catching out waitress’s eye and lifting two fingers to grab her attention.
“Everything alright?” she asked, pushing some pink hair out of her heart-shaped face.
“No,” Tanner interrupted, picking through his claws. “He’s in love with his best friend’s little sister, and he isn’t man enough to do anything about it.”
I glared at him.
“Lucky girl,” she said.
Tanner and I both looked at her.
“Not about the second part,” she said, blushing until her cheeks matched her hair. “But if you like her…she must be really special.”
“I’m not in love with her,” I said, surprised at how clumsy my tongue felt saying the words.
“My bad,” Tanner said. “Maybe I got her confused with those sweet potato fries you’re still waiting on.”
“Oh my god I’m so sorry,” our waitress said, her eyes scouring the table for my missing side dish.
“Don’t worry about the crab toasts,” I said. “Just the fries, if it’s not too much trouble.”
“Of course,” she said, glancing between us. “I’ll bring them right away.”
As soon as she left, I turned my focus back across the high table. “Why’d you go dragging that poor girl into this when she’s already run off her feet?”
“Oh please,” he said, throwing his eyes to the sky. “By the way she batted her fake lashes at you, I think it’s safe to say no dragging was necessary.”
“Is that what this is really about? You have the hots for Maddy, and you can’t stand the fact that it’s me she’s interested in?”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” he said, his eyes narrowing on mine. “I could have her if I wanted her.”
My jaw clenched with my exhale. “I see what you're doing, and I'm not taking the bait,” I said, disturbed by how much his flippant comment affected my blood pressure.
“I'm trying to do you a favor, dumbass.”
I studied his expression and tried to determine if he was being genuine or trying to shove me in front of a James-sized bus for sport.
“I haven't seen you this frazzled since Salsalito brought out their loyalty card.”
I laughed at the memory of how excited I was while their “earn free burritos” program lasted. “That was six years ago.”
His brows peaked. “My point exactly.”
My lips drew a thin line as his accusation sank in. Was he right? Had it been that long since I’d been pleasantly distracted by something? Was my sense of unwavering self-control merely an apathetic rut?
“So you’re really not sleeping with her?” he asked, his head stooping with disbelief.
I stared back at him, letting him see the truth in my eyes so I wouldn’t have to say it again.
“Damn.” He ran his fingers through his thick brown hair. “I’m kind of surprised you’ve lasted this long.”
“Me too,” I admitted, dunking my lobster roll in the shallow pot of lemon sauce. Me too.
