AllFreeNovel
Share Us
T H I R T Y E I G H T
- Quinn -
It was too easy to slip back into my selfish ways. So easy it made me detest myself, made me question whether the cold prick I’d been for over a decade was the real me.
I knew I didn’t want to be this guy forever, this unlikeable, aloof asshole. But for some reason, I needed to prove I hadn’t lost myself in all the fun I’d been having with Maddy, needed to prove I could retreat into my comfort zone.
Turns out I could.
Turns out it felt terrible.
For two weeks now, the cupcakes she bought me had sat on my desk at home, untouched. I could no more bring myself to eat them than I could bring myself to throw them away. If I ate them, their sweetness would only remind me of her, and the taste would turn bitter when I remembered the face she made at me before she closed her bedroom door that night.
It was a face full of disappointment and confusion. A face that said she wouldn’t be quick to forgive me for jerking her around, for rejecting her like a fish I’d reeled all the way to my boat only to throw her back in the sea.
What kind of monster was I?
She’d ordered the cupcakes special, that much was clear. All four of them were decorated with little candy socks that had been hand painted with cartoon characters. No doubt she hoped they’d make me smile, and I’m sure they would’ve if I hadn’t ruined the whole evening because I was an emotionally unavailable jerk who was more afraid of letting her in than letting her down.
I sighed and stared at my Cajun sweet potato fries, but even they failed to lift my spirits. It was as if denying Maddy’s affection had zapped all my zest.
“Trouble in paradise?” Tanner asked, lifting the bun on his cheeseburger before dousing it with ketchup.
“You could say that.”
“Want to talk about it?”
“No,” I said. “There’s nothing to talk about. It’s over.”
His brows jumped up his forehead. “What do you mean it’s over?”
“I mean she’s avoiding me like a plague-infested rat and hasn’t looked me in the eye in two weeks.”
He lifted his burger with both hands. “What did you do?”
“What makes you think I did something?”
“Wild guess,” he said, taking a big bite.
I glared at him.
He held a hand in front of his full mouth. “It’s always you,” he said, swallowing his bite before he continued. “You’re Quinn fucking Draper. That’s your thing.”
“What’s my thing?” I asked, my spine stiffening.
“Pushing people away before they get too close.”
“That’s not my thing.”
He scoffed.
Heat spread across the back of my neck.
“Okay,” he said, raising his palms. “It’s not your thing. It’s just a coincidence that you’ve done it with every girl you’ve dated for as long as I’ve known you, not to mention any guy that didn’t respect your deep need for privacy.”
“Tell me what you really think.”
“I think you’re probably in love with her, but you’re too allergic to feelings to admit it to yourself.”
