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It was abnormally quiet. Everyone was back in class by now, which meant they were all alone in the area, and he felt it.
He wanted her to say something, say anything, but there was nothing.
When it became a little too much, he walked past her out of the alleyway. She didn’t follow him that time.
twenty-seven
tully
How was it that she always messed up?
Time after time after time, she made a mistake and it ended up biting her in the ass.
She should have just been honest with everyone from the start. This is what happens when you are a poor liar.
Someone got hurt. Someone sheactuallyliked.
Nathan had every right to be upset with her, she deserved it. He’d been nothing but kind and helpful through this whole ordeal. She trusted him more in a couple weeks than she did most people she knew, now he might be upset with her enough to call off this whole deal.
If that happened, she was screwed.
But what could she do? She didn’t know how to fix it. Taking it back would mean so little now that it was already out there, but she would be willing to try if Nathan wanted her to. That was if he would talk to her after today.
She didn’t see him at all after school, so she went home without any resolution and more worry. When she arrived, there was a small, bundled package on the front porch with her name scribbled in familiar handwriting. Seeing it diminished her frustration for a minute, and she picked it up and immediately took it inside to her bedroom.
She wasted no time opening the mysterious package. Having anything to get her mind off of upsetting Nathan was well worth the time, so she ripped off the tape and wrapping to reveal a haphazardly folded gray band t-shirt with Aerosmith written on the front under a photo of all the members. Tully laughed.
Eugene had teased her relentlessly about her taste in music for a few years, so this was either like an inside joke or a truce.
When she lifted it up, a piece of paper folded in half tumbled out. It was much smaller than the rest of his other letters, but as a whole, the entire package was about 10 times the size so she would let it slide.
There were only two short sentences inside:I guess they weren’t so bad. I just needed to see them perform live. - Eugene
That jerk. He went to see them and didn’t even invite her? Not that her parents would ever willingly agree to pay her way, but she could dream.
She wanted to make sure he knew how upset she was that he didn’t invite her, so she ran to the kitchen phone and dialed his apartment number. It rang several times before someone answered. Unfortunately, it wasn’t him. One of his roommates told her he was gone and wouldn’t return for a while.
She hung up, disappointed that she wouldn’t be able to thank him in person. But he liked letters anyway, so she pulled out a paper and quickly chastised him for betraying her, for teasing her tastes just to be converted, and finally, to thank him.
Her pencil paused on the paper and for a moment, she considered confessing everything to him. She really wanted to tell someone how much she’d messed up—just get it all out in the open and off her chest. She could call Stephanie, but she also wanted to tell someone on the outside who could give her advice. Eugene was good at advice. Jolie got out of trouble by shedding some tears and sweet talking, but Eugene was also skilled at weaseling his way out of awkward situations. Maybe it was a writer thing, but he had more creativity in his thumb than Tully had in her entire body. If anyone could help her come up with a plausible solution to her problem, it was him.
But in the end, just like in her last letter, the worry of how he would judge her for getting into the situation put that plan on pause and she scrapped it in exchange for a conclusion of well wishes.
She would send the letter in the morning on the way to school.
She knew better than to rely on other people for anything, and this situation with Nathan was just another thing she would have to figure out on her own.
twenty-eight
tully
Turns out, the best solution Tully could come up with by school the next day was to just avoid Nathan altogether. She’d managed it well enough all the way up until lunchtime.
If she didn’t see him, he wouldn’t be able to call off their arrangement, and she would have more time to figure things out. Plus, she’d have to continue alone because Stephanie was still sick. Based on her raspy, breathy, garbled voice on the phone the night before, it sounded like she might be for a while.
She did have time to give her a brief of the situation to which she got a short, coughed reply:get over yourself and apologize.
It was easier said than done, but Tully knew Stephanie was right. She just felt that if she was going to grovel she also needed to prepare her response for when he inevitably ‘broke up’ with her.
