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‘Creon?’ I hated the smallness of my voice. Hours and hours of deliberate silence, of his gaze avoiding me wherever I went, had sent doubt seeping into even the firmest of certainties – but whatever I’d done to displease him, surely it couldn’t bethisbad? ‘You … you don’t think I should make that bargain, do you?’
He blinked – a single blink, breaking through his perfect control like a thunderclap shattering the stillness of night.
His lips said,What?
‘I just … If you disagree—’
What for the gods’ sakes are you talking about?he cut in, the motions of his fingers sharp and rushed. In the eerie green glow of the temple, it was a challenge to read the signs – but his bewildered eyes darting over my face told a clear enough story.I’d kill every single soul on Phurys before I let you make that bargain. Why in hell would you think—
‘I don’t know what I’m thinking!’ I burst out, the words echoing back at me from the low ceiling of the room. ‘I don’t know anything anymore! What in hell areyoudoing? Are you really so desperate to make your gods-damned point that you’d rather treat me like some stranger for days than—’
His left hand slanted over my mouth.
Endlessly familiar fingers settled on my chin and jaw, the shock of that raw force enough to put a swift end to my sentence. He stepped towards me with flaring wings – just a step, but somehow his towering silhouette swallowed half the room.
My shrieking inhalation filled my lungs with the scent of his skin. I gave up on talking – gave up on anything but my desperate attempt not to burst into tears.
He stared at me for three endless heartbeats until he finally raised his free hand.My point?The signs were painstakingly deliberate, every twitch meticulously measured.What point exactly would I be making, Em?
‘That you’re pissed off with me and my lies?’ I managed, voice wobbling with my chin still locked between his fingers. ‘That I need to change my mind about not telling the others, and that—’
And you think this is how I’d choose to convey that opinion?His signs came faster and faster – anger or confusion, I couldn’t tell.By ignoring you for days?
‘Well, apparently it is!’ My words came out on a whisper, but a furious whisper sharp enough to draw blood. ‘Why else would you do it? They already know you don’t hate me to death, and you wouldn’t tell them anything new bylookingat me every now and then – so what’s the sense in ignoring me as if I’m some disobedient child?’
He stared at me in the deafening silence for one, two heartbeats, eyes darting over my face with the full weight of his all-knowing demon senses.
Then he mouthed,Fuck.
‘What?’ Of all the things I’d expected, this was the last – the sudden understanding dawning in his widening eyes, a look of … was ithorror? He abruptly released my face, and I stumbled back, nearly tripping over a sturdy pillow. ‘Are you suddenly realising it may not have been the kindest idea to—’
Em, his fingers interrupted, the signs brusque and snappish,I’m not those bloody parents of yours, remember?
My heart stilled for the shortest fraction of a moment.
Those bloody parents of mine.
And at once they were back, the memories playing out before my mind’s eye – Editta’s curt and unwilling replies, Valter’s pointed looks over my shoulder, the two of them unable to acknowledge my existence for days because I’d been snarky to the neighbours again or worn the wrong dress again or, worst of all, nearly revealed my powers to the wrong people again …
Like a disobedient child, indeed. Like that unwanted little creature who had never even been theirs, a heavy burden to discard as soon as the opportunity arose.
Tears suddenly burned behind my eyes, hot and shameful.
Fuck. Cactus.Hot breath brushed across my forehead as he stepped closer, signing his words at dizzying speed.You thought I was ignoring you out of revenge? Just to spite you?
‘Why … why else would you …’
For hell’s sake – do you have any idea what this does to me, Em?He drew in an unsteady breath, fingers stiffening for an instant.Watching you shove me away time and time again to please Tared and his little feelings? Knowing how fucking smug he’s feeling, saving yet another poor damsel from the hands of demon brood? There’s a lot I can handle, but I’d rather stick a knife into my own guts than hear you declare one more time that you’re not stupid enough to go near me.
‘What? But … but you …’
I couldn’t find a way to finish that sentence; its lousy start hovered ominously in the few inches between our faces. Creon lowered his hand, but his clenched jaw and heavy breath were a clear sign we hadn't yet reached the end of this conversation.
‘But you said it was fine,’ I breathed, stomach turning. ‘You said you understood. Why didn’t you tell me …’
I understand. I really do.Something twitched in his jaw.But if you insist on pushing me away every time I reach out to you, don’t expect me to keep reaching out. I thought that would be clear enough.
‘That …’ I stared at him, the catch in my throat growing thorny and painful. ‘That’s all? You weren’t trying to … to punish me?’
