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He chuckled. ‘Impress me.’
As if we were back at training, back at our usual games and challenges. As if none of this journey had ever happened – as if I was still just as much at home in the Underground as I’d ever been, no nagging fears that perhaps this world had never been built to grant a haven to godsworn unbound mages.
As if he’d never snapped those words in my face.Go to hell, Emelin.
I took a swing – too quick, too reckless. He blocked it easily, retaliating with an attack I only barely dodged.
‘You know what the problem is?’ I said between gritted teeth, eyeing the seemingly nonchalant circles of his blade as we both retreated. ‘I’m pretty sure I told you several times that I was fine and didn’t need your help. Even if you were worried, you could have done me the honour of treating me like a bloody adult andbelievingme, rather than running off with your own prejudice and taking matters into your own hands.’
‘Which is an interesting argument to make,’ he said, sword never faltering, ‘given that you’ve technically been lying through your teeth for months.’
‘Oh, you’re going to blamemefor that now? You’re—’
He lashed out so swiftly his sword blurred into a silvery streak of light. I interrupted myself with a blurted curse, fending off the attack in a reflex so intuitive I didn’t realise what I was doing until our blades bounced off each other with a metallic shriek.
‘Don’t throw too much weight into the move,’ he said, drawing back again. ‘You’ll lose your balance too easily.’
I nodded wordlessly, shifting my hands on the hilt as I regained my footing. My elbow was hurting a little from the force of that clash. I easily ignored it; the spinning fury of my thoughts was a far more urgent injury.
‘So who should I blame for the lies, then?’ he added, never changing his tone of voice. ‘Did anyone force you to tell them?’
‘No!’ Too shrill. I couldn’t let myself get carried away now; he’d just attack again if I allowed myself to lose control. ‘For the bloody gods’ sakes, Tared, don’t you see I was lying because ofyou?’
He faltered. I shot forward – two could play that game – but he’d recovered before I could complete my swing at his left shoulder, dodging with an impossibly quick turn to the right. His voice did not waver. ‘Please elaborate.’
‘What in hell was I supposed to think after you spent hours nobly and helpfully insulting the person I happened to be madly in love with?’ I feigned an attack. He didn’t bite. ‘For all I knew, you’d kick me out of the house if I told you, and that—’
He stiffened.
My strike forwards – no more than another half-hearted attempt, a challenge more than an attack – shot straight past his defences, past an alf steel blade that barely eventriedto stop me. I only just managed to change direction, to twist my own weapon away from the path straight to his heart. The steel edge bit into his left arm instead, meeting the sickening resistance of skin and muscle before swinging free again.
I cried out.
Blood sprung where my sword had been an instant before, spreading through his grey shirt within moments.
‘Oh,fuck.’ I staggered back, weapon clattering from my hands.Hurt you, I’d said, and only now did I realise how little I’d meant that threat; the sight of that wound was the fastest antidote to the brewing anger inside me. ‘Fuck, Tared, I’m sorry. Let me heal—’
‘Kick youout?’ he interrupted, his own blade sagging.
‘Tared, your arm!’
‘To hell with my arm – where in the world did you get that idea, Em?’ That was genuine shock in his voice – as if an executioner was merrily enquiring, axe over his shoulder, why I had ever been so silly to fear for the state of my neck. ‘Did Creon—’
‘No! And stop blaming him for everything, for fuck’s sake!’ My voice shot dangerously close to the point of shrieking. ‘Youare the one who told me go to go hell the moment you found out! Was I supposed to take that as a friendly invitation into your home? When you were angry enough to—'
‘Yes, of course I was angry!’ he bit out with a wide swing of his injured arm. Blood was trickling over the inside of his elbow now. ‘I’d just found out you’d been lying to me for months, that you gotLynto lie to me for months, and I couldn’t fucking figure out why. How does that have anything to do with—’
‘It wasn’t just that fight! You’ve been doing it since we got here!’ I clenched my hands into fists – anything to keep them from trembling as the bitter truth finally poured over my lips. ‘You never went a day without reminding every person in the world that you could barely stand to look at him – so how was I supposed to tell you the truth when I knew damn well you’d disagree with my decisions and might do gods know what in response? Did you ever even consider what that might look like to me, your stupid hateful campaign to get him out of here when I told you so many times I didn’t want him to be goinganywhere?’
He stared at me for a long, bewildered second, then turned away with a sharp intake of breath, sliding his sword into its sheath in the same movement. The trickle of blood had reached the wrist of his left hand now; he either hadn't noticed or didn’t care.
‘Tared …’ I started.
‘Alright,’ he said, raking a hand through his already messy blond locks. His voice was unusually unsteady. ‘Seems like I have underestimated the misunderstanding and overestimated my own clarity of communication. By a rather significant margin. Give me … give me a moment to figure out what’s going on here.’
‘It’s rather clear what’s going on here, isn’t it?’ I ground out.
‘Not tome.’ A small groan. ‘You actually thought—’
