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“Okay, buddy. I gotta go. I promised your mommy I’d leave after I said what I came to say.” I walk toward her, her back facing me. I want to wrap my arms around her. I’ve missed her touch, but I can’t force this, and it may take her a while to believe me.
“You can’t go,” she says with a sigh.
“You need time to think about this, Rosso. I don’t want to pressure you.”
She whips around and empties the space between us. “Then maybe you shouldn’t have gone out in a fucking snowstorm. It’s not that I want you to stay, but you can’t leave. They aren’t letting anyone out of the building.”
She shoves the phone in my face.
Apartment Security:No one is allowed to leave the building. The city of Chicago has implemented a state of emergency. If you have guests, please keep them in your apartment. For everyone’s safety, we’re asking that these simple instructions are followed. Thank you for your help.
“Simple, my ass. And by the way,” she continues, moving closer to my face, “I don’t think you realize what you’re giving up. I’m not going to be the person you blame because you don’t have your own little baby Torano one day. I see how you are with your nieces and nephew. And more and more of your friends will have kids one day. You’re young, it’ll happen. What will you do when Bodhi gets remarried? I see how you light up when you talk about his son. Or Garner. One day he’ll either claim Kayla or move on, and I’m sure he’ll have little Garner babies. Plus,my sister is about to have another one. I can’t be the reason you settle.”
“I’m not settling. You’re everything to me, Sandra.”
She turns from me, walking to her bedroom from the living room. “Come on, Otis,” she calls, but he stays near me, at my feet.
“Fuck you, Dominic Torano. Fuck you for making me fall for you. But more so for coming here and making me be the bad guy. I won’t be the reason you end up hating me one day.” She narrows her stare on Otis next. “And you, you big mean traitor! You two can both have the couch for all I care.”
She slams the door behind her, and Otis and I are left alone, together.
I’ve kickedoff my shoes, and I’ve rolled over to give Otis room on the couch, but he insists on lying on the top part of my side, snoring as if he has no clue his mama is mad at the both of us.
My text pings, and I wonder if it’s Sandra from the other side of the wall. I pick it up to Bodhi’s name.
Bo:Hey, man, just checking to see if you’re safe. It’s a nightmare out there.
Me:Safe is a relative term, but I’m warm and indoors, and not dealing with the snowstorm of the century. Did you get Declan? Are you home?
Bo:I came to pick him up from Clara’s. But he was with his grandma and she couldn’t get into the city. And now I’m stuck at Clara’s with her and Jack.
Oh, fuck. I’m not sure which one of us is in a worse situation.
Bo:BTW, what do you mean, safe is a relative term? Where the hell are you?
Me:Oh, you’ll get a kick out of this. Seems like we’re both in a little over our heads. Your words have been nagging at me for two weeks. You know, when you asked me what if I never find a woman I love like Sandra? Yeah. I blame you, by the way. I stopped by to tell her, and her building is not letting anyone leave. Thanks.
I wait for him to read my novel-length response, and all I get in return are smiley faces and laughing emojis.
Me:You’re an asshole.
Bo:Yeah, but you have to admit we’re both up a creek without a paddle. So, how did she take the news? Apparently not well.
Me:She thinks I’ll resent her one day.
The bubbles appear on the bottom of the text thread and disappear for a long time, only to appear again.
Bo:I think you’ll always have a pang for a child, but I truly think you know what you’re accepting. I’ve seen you, and you’re miserable, no matter how often you try to lie.
Me:So, you think I’ll resent her?
Bo:No. But I think you’ll ache for a baby, even though you know the right decision for you is choosing Sandra over a child you may never have, because you’ll never love anyone like her.
He’s onto something here.
Bo:Be honest with her. Don’t act like it will be all rainbows and unicorns because you’ve made this choice. Admit it will be hard at times, but you’ll never regret being with her. Period.
Fuck, I hate when he uses his wisdom on me.
