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“I see.” Her sharp gaze studied my face. “Anything you want to talk about?”
Frowning, I didn’t say anything. Where would I even begin?
“Give me a minute.” She disappeared into the kitchen.
I continued to drink my beer, content to sit alone in the silence. I needed a proper shower and a change of clothes, but couldn’t bring myself to care at the moment.
“I wanted it to be you. And I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.”
Madre di dio. How I wanted that to be true.
But he was full of shit. Giulio and his runway looks and anonymous blow jobs. He was trying to fuck with my head.
Unfortunately for me, it was working.
I was finishing the last of the beer when Mrs. Campbell returned, a plate in her hands. She set it down in front of me and refilled my empty pint glass. “A bacon sandwich. That’s my homemade bread.”
I took the beer but didn’t touch the plate. “Thank you.”
“You’d better eat it. I don’t like my food going to waste.”
She was still watching, so I put the glass down and took a bite of the sandwich. It was salty and crispy, the bread warm and crusty. All of the sudden I was starving.
She busied herself while I finished eating. It didn’t take long, only three or four more bites. She nodded to the plate. “Would you like another?”
“Do you have any soup?”
“The best cock-a-leekie in Scotland. I’ll bring you some more bread.” She took the pint glass away and replaced it with water. “Does this have anything to do with nice Mr. Drakos?”
Mr. Drakos wasn’t so nice. “How did you guess?”
She hooked a thumb toward the beer tap. “I know man troubles when I see them. Are you two still arguing?”
“You know we aren’t boyfriends.”
“I figured, when I saw you carrying a HK P30L and heard that you threatened all the fishermen on the island.”
It was telling that she recognized the type of pistol I carried. “So you also know this isn’t going to end well.”
Her dark brown gaze was understanding and weary. A woman who’d seen and done a lot in her time. “All of us make our own choices, laddie. And it’s never too late to change your direction.”
“Sometimes it is.”
“No, it’s not. Don’t live your life with regrets. People like us? We have enough demons as it is.”
I twisted the water glass on the bar top, not meeting her eye. “What branch were you in?”
“Well, now. That’s a story for another time.” She straightened and reached for her clipboard. “I’ve got more inventory to do. Think about what I said.”
After she left, I stared at the water droplets on the glass in my hand. She was wrong. I couldn’t make my own choices, not about this job.
It wasn’t a question of what. Only a question of when.
* * *
Giulio
Indecision ate at me the rest of the day.
