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I storm out of Destan’s quarters, barking at him not to follow me. I don’t need to be watched and minded like a child. I killed Cebba Dawnsong, and they’re treating me like a porcelain doll, as if I have no power of my own. I think of how Ruskin dismissed me at first, and the lens through which I recall our conversation shifts. He knew who I was the day he met me. He suspected I could do near-impossible things with gold. And yet when my abilities began to grow, he denied it, let me think I was being delusional.
I hardly feel the fresh layer of betrayal.
The why matters less than the fact that before I even understood what I could do, he was trying to keep it from me—separate me from this piece of myself for his own, private motivations.
I could scream, loud enough to wake up the whole palace with it. But to what end? More excuses? More placations?
I’m done.
It’s long been clear that Ruskin doesn’t fully trust me, but I feel an utter fool for trusting him—especially with my heart.
Half an hour later I’m in front of the Monarch Gate, dressed, with my bag in hand. Even with everything, I hesitate now, my chest rising and falling with fast, fearful breaths in the quiet night air. I’ve done what I promised. I helped Ruskin and the kingdom; I broke the curse. Even if I didn’t know Ruskin’s true name, the deal couldn’t compel me to stay now. The only thing that would keep me here is my love for him.
I know I have to go. I have to save myself. And yet my battered heart tugs against it, pulling me back towards the palace, towards where Ruskin sleeps, expecting to wake with me beside him.
The Monarch Gate only goes one way, and I don’t know the location of the gate in the Kilda. If I do this, there’s no coming back. No way back to Faerie on my own. The door will be firmly shut behind me.
I touch my hand to the gate, whispering one word: “Solskir.” The gift he gave me when he didn’t have to. The bait that pulled me under. It’s no use to me now beyond this, a key to the way back home.
The lock of the Monarch Gate clicks open, and I turn the handle to reveal a portal onto fields under the damp, gray sky of Styrland.
I step through it.
