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“It’s just a saying, I think.”
His shoulders drop. “I don’t like sayings. They never make sense.”
I shrug. “What do you like?”
His dark eyebrows draw together. They’re kind of big for his face, but I suppose he’ll grow into them, eventually. His eyes close tight, like he’s thinking really hard, then they fly open. “Hockey,” he whispers, his voice laced with excitement. But he doesn’t offer any more information.
“That’s cool.” I smile again and this time my smile is returned. I hedge, noticing the feet moving around us. Everyone must be finding their desks.
“So, you wanna come out of hiding and sit at our desk? I think class is about to start.”
His face crumples, and I wonder if he’s going to cry again.
“I’ll be here with you,” I tell him. “You’re my first friend in second grade.”
His eyes widen. “Y-y-you want to be my friend?”
“Of course,” I say quickly. “I’m gonna need you to teach me about hockey.”
The boy’s mouth turns up in a crooked grin. “Okay,” he whispers, sliding out from under the tables with me. His skin is still pale, but his eyes are dry.
I take a seat at the desk marked with my name and he smiles nervously, then takes the seat beside me. The name on the desk says Ford.
“Are you Ford?” I ask, and he nods. “That’s a really nice name.”
He gives me another crooked grin.
CHAPTER
ONE
FORD
Standing at the Delta Airlines baggage claim, I study the stupid sign I made earlier today. This morning making a glittery sign for Amber’s first visit here as a mom seemed not only fun, but like I was extending an olive branch. A proverbial, “look how fun this welcome sign is! I don’t care that my best friend since childhood now has a baby with a man I can’t stand. Oh, and welcome to D.C.!”
But as I shift awkwardly on my feet, the sign seems way over the top. It looks like I’m trying too hard, or not being genuine.
Because the fact is, Theo is a scumbag, and he not only broke my best friend’s heart, but left her with a baby and pretty much no support.
I close my eyes and try not to let my anger at Theo ruin Amber’s visit before it even begins. Taking a deep breath, I attempt to swallow my irritation, but my throat feels thick. I bring my hand up to tug at the collar of my long-sleeved D.C. Eagles hockey tee.
The soft fabric of my tee begins to itch where it touches my skin. My dark-wash jeans pull on my legs like they’re too tight. The glasses resting on my face feel too heavy. Everything is closing in on me, strangling me. I close my eyes and thrust a hand into my jeans pocket to find my dad’s university hockey championship coin he gave me as a kid. It’s dumb, childish even, but the smooth texture of the cold metal and the tiny grooves along the edge have always calmed me. It probably just takes my mind off the feelings overwhelming my brain sometimes, but nevertheless, I always have it with me.
I focus on the coin’s varying textures as my winding thoughts calm down. My heart is still beating fast, but my clothes don’t feel tight and scratchy anymore.
Before I can open my eyes, Amber’s sweet voice filters through my ears, and all the overwhelming feelings float away.
“Hey, Ford. You look good.”
She’s the only one who still calls me Ford, while the rest of the world knows me as Remington, or Remy… team captain of the D.C. Eagles. A smile spreads across my face as my eyes fly open. The sight of Amber, with her red hair, now pale pink at the ends, and bright green eyes makes my heart stop—and then race. But not in a bad way.
A soft coo pulls my attention down to a tiny head covered in a pink knitted hat. My gaze shoots back up to Amber. She’s watching me closely, and I hate that she looks nervous at my reaction to her baby. But even more so, I hate that I’m nervous about my own reaction. What if she looks like Theo? Worse yet, what if she acts like him? I know she has her mother’s red hair, that much was obvious in photos. But it’s hard to make out a baby’s features.
“Nice sign. You even added glitter.”
I meet her gaze and offer a shrug with no other explanation, then take a step forward. Leaning over, I look at the tiny human strapped onto my best friend’s body. Her little face is chubby and rosy-pink, with the widest green eyes I’ve ever seen. She’s a carbon copy of her mother. The baby blinks up at me, with long lashes that are blonde at the base and reddish on the tips. Her lashes flutter as she looks at me… and then her mouth pulls up into a toothless grin, making one dimple pop on her left cheek. The dimple is from her father, but even that thought doesn’t squelch the affection expanding inside me for this little girl. Meeting her feels different than I imagined, and now I feel stupid for being nervous about it.
My mouth pulls into a smile. I couldn’t stop it even if I wanted to.
