AllFreeNovel
Share Us
And then I spend a while longer proving to Ruby that every word I just told her was true.
chapter twenty-one
Ruby
The sunrise at the top of Kilroy is unlike anything I’ve ever seen in my life. The entirety of Cedar Point stretches out before us, giving us a breathtaking view of Cedar Lake surrounded by trees and forest in the distance that lead off to Yosemite.
I asked Boyd yesterday why the hike took so long since the view doesn’t feel like it’s high enough to warrant a six-hour ascent to the top. Apparently, the trail we took out of Cedar Point loops around to the back side of the peak, adding an additional three-plus hours to a hike that would only take two and a half if we’d driven around to the other side.
“But where’s the fun in that?” he’d said, grinning and continuing on the trek.
Sitting here at the top, my legs dangling over the edge of a rock that juts out and away from the ridge, I couldn’t agree with him more. The sweat equity of getting up here has made this view all the more magical.
Just like my time with Boyd.
God, I’m falling in love with him.
I’m falling in love with a man I’ve known for a week, and every single part of me feels on board with this absolutely reckless decision.
I’ve tried to talk myself out of it, tried to remind myself of the men in my life who have let me down and made me feel like my presence is unwanted.
But Boyd isn’t those other men. He’s unlike any man, and I can’t manage to lump him in with the ones who have made me feel so small and unimportant in the past.
We sit together at the top, his front pressed against my back, his legs on either side of mine as we both hang our legs down, his arms wrapped around my middle. It’s one of the most amazing feelings in the world.
There’s something to be said about protecting your heart, keeping yourself safe, but it feels different when you have a strong man at your back who will tuck you against him to make sure you don’t fall.
Falling in love seems unsafe to me.
Trusting a man seems unsafe to me.
Believing in someone other than myself seems unsafe to me.
Somehow, Boyd has taken all those places of danger and wrapped me in a bulletproof vest made of his care and concern. Those things are no less unsafe, but I don’t have to be afraid, because I’ve been enveloped in the safety of his…love?
I’m not sure how he feels about me, entirely. The way he treats me and talks to me sure feels like what I assume love is, but I can’t be sure unless we talk about it.
Even though I’m feeling a lot more brave than I was even a few days ago, I still have things to work through.
No woman can come out of the things I’ve experienced with my ex and my dad and pretend everything is picture perfect, but I at least have someone I’m willing to take a chance on, a man who has said and done some of the most thoughtful and beautiful things to make sure I feel like I matter.
The things he said in the tent last night, the way he’s cared about me in the wake of what’s happened with my father—those are not small things. I might even go as far as to say that we might be able to take this relationship that has bloomed so beautifully in Cedar Point and transplant it back to Boston.
When we started this little thing between us, it felt much more like a fling, like it would be fun here and then a nice goodbye once I go home. But the more time passes, the more Boyd continues to prove to me over and over and over again that the man he is deserves to be compared to no one else, the more I wonder if he might be the guy who’s worth breaking all my rules for.
And not just while we’re in Cedar Point—I’m talking in the long run. Maybe I’ll bring it up to Boyd when we get back to town and the two of us have a moment alone.
The hike down is a lot less fun than the hike up was, simply because the element of anticipation is gone, replaced with the nagging reminder that we have a long walk ahead to get back.
Eventually, we do finally make it back around two on Saturday, the exhaustion in my body thick and overwhelming. All I want to do is wash the dirt and dust from my body, drink an obscene amount of water, and snuggle up next to Boyd.
I smile, wondering what things might be like back in Boston. Maybe I’m jumping the gun, but I can’t help allowing myself to daydream, this new and very trusting part of my persona pushing me to fantasize about the future. Will we spend most of our time at his place or mine? Will he take me on proper dates or will we slip right into something simple and easy? Will my mom like him?
I spend a long time in the shower, scrubbing away all the filth and grime. Boyd told me to just go on to the guesthouse when we got back instead of helping him and Bishop clean up all the gear.
“It’s boys’ work,” he said, swatting my ass and sending me on my way.
Now, I’m showered, changed, smelling delicious, and snuggled up on the little loveseat in Patty’s guesthouse, flipping through social media and zoning out.
