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“When, Gabi?” he asks, his voice gravelly and filled with desire.
“Last night,” I whisper.
We both moan as he begins to slide into me from behind.
“I touched myself thinking about you, wishing I’d stayed, wishing we could have been doing this.”
I hiss out the last word as Bishop’s dick bottoms out, his hips flush with mine.
“Fuck, Gabi,” he says. “Do you have any idea how crazy I am about you?” He pulls all the way out then slides back in, this time faster. “How hearing something like that makes me feel?”
Out and then in again, the clap of our joining bodies echoing against the wall of trees.
“Knowing you think about me when you’re alone.” Clap. “About me inside you.” Clap. “Making you come.”
I cry out into the darkness as Bishop begins to thrust into me earnestly, struggling to stand as the flickering of an orgasm begins to lick at the edges of my body.
“God, you’re everything,” he tells me, his voice hoarse, thick with emotion. “Everything, Gabi.”
He thrusts a few more times, his hand sliding back down between my legs and rubbing at my clit again, and that does it. I splinter, shattering into a million pieces that scatter about on the ground below where we stand as my orgasm rips through me. It hits every nerve, tightens every muscle, from my nose to my toes and then back again.
I sob at how beautiful and wonderful it is, my body feeling flayed wide open. And then I hear Bishop shout, feel the way his hands grip me more roughly, the way his body freezes behind me as he tumbles over as well.
We stand there for a long minute, each of us catching our breath, the sound of the rain and nature around us rushing back in to fill the silence. But with the quiet and the calm also comes the reality that we’re standing outside in various stages of nakedness, in nearly freezing weather. We make quick work of yanking our clothes back on, giggling as we rush inside to where it’s warm and the fire is still blazing.
Bishop collapses on the couch, dragging me down with him and nestling me in tight between his body and the back of the sofa. We just lie there for a while, holding each other, kissing occasionally.
That desire is still there. To tell him that I love him. To communicate not just with my body, but with words, what he means to me. What I see for our future. The fact that I’m all in for whatever is to come.
But for whatever reason, even in the face of the raw intimacy we just shared, I can’t seem to say it. I can’t make the words come out.
So instead, I stay quiet, just enjoying the closeness and knowing it will come eventually, knowing at some point, I’ll feel brave enough to tell him how I feel.
chapter twenty-five
Bishop
… six weeks later …
Watching Gabi sleep might be my new favorite hobby.
When you’re a teenager, sneaking around trying to find a place and time to have sex doesn’t typically result in too much down time after it’s all said and done. Once you’re both finished, it’s about getting dressed as quickly as possible so you don’t get caught by anyone’s parents.
So, getting the luxury of holding my girlfriend next to me until we each begin to stir, our naked bodies pressed together, is a new wonder, and watching her sleep is something special. I get to look at that beautiful face, completely at rest, her long eyelashes fluttering every so often. I take in the finer details I don’t always notice, like the little freckles that dust her temples or the barely visible scar on her chin.
Because I’m the early riser, my body often waking me around 5:30, I get to just lie here next to her, reveling in what it means to get to hold her close again.
Things between us have been incredible. Better than ever. There’s a new level of openness I don’t think we ever had when we were younger, a new ability to communicate what we think and how we feel and what we want. It’s still a new phenomenon, but it’s one I’m enjoying.
Like last week, when Gabi was talking about the new workshop she’s hoping to build in a few months, and she got mad because she thought I wasn’t listening. In the past, she would have stormed out of the room and it would have taken me a while to figure out what was wrong and how to fix it.
But instead, she just let me know she was saying something important and she’d really like if I could stop glancing at my phone. Which I did, and then we moved on, and it was amazing. It’s like I’m getting the chance to be back with the Gabi I’ve always known and loved, but I also get to learn some really cool new things about her, things that make me love her even more.
She breathes in deeply as she begins to wake next to me, and then her eyes peek open. She grins and then closes her eyes again before pressing her face into my chest.
“Good morning, sunshine,” I say, kissing the top of her head. “How’d you sleep?”
Gabi nods and mumbles something, and I work my arms around her so she’s tucked snugly against me.
