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I can’t trust him. But worse than that, I can’t trust myself.
“Where’s Toby?” I reply, placing Blue Bear on top of the suitcase.
“He’s in the den, playing,” she replies, stepping into the room. “Lia, we should talk.”
“I really don’t think there’s much to say,” I respond, hating how I sound because none of this is Daisy’s fault. But I feel raw, exposed, and the only way to protect myself, to protect Toby, is to move on, to leave, even if that means leaving Daisy too.
“There’s plenty to say, Lia,” Daisy argues. “You need to hear me out okay? You’re my friend, I care about you. I know that you’re hurting, but there are things I need to tell you…”
“Hurting?” I release a broken laugh, forcing myself not to cry. I’ve done too much of that already. “I’m angry, Daisy. I’m scared. I’m heartbroken.”
“Drix is heartbroken too. I’ve never seen him this cut up. He’s not himself without you.”
“He’s never been himself around me, Daisy. It was all a lie.”
She sits down on the edge of the bed, reaching for my hand, taking it in hers. “No, it wasn’t.”
“How can you say that?”
“Because it’s true. Drix is still the man you fell in love with,” she insists. “His kindness, his big heart, his warmth, his love for you, none of that was a lie. I know him.”
“I thought I did too,” I whisper out, casting my gaze away, dragging in a deep breath.
“I know it’s hard to come to terms with what he did. It was difficult for me to hear too, but I’ve had years of loving Drix, and I can categorically say that he is a good man. He did what he did out of love for me, just like he took on this debt and became their enforcer to keep looking after me.”
“It’s hard for me to get my head around all of this,” I admit.
“All of the good he’s done far outweighs the bad. He is not like your husband,” she insists. “He would never hurt you or Toby, me, his friends, any decent person. The men he’s hurt, they aren’t good people.”
“So you’re saying that I should just turn a blind eye, forget that he almost killed a man? That I should stay with him and ignore the fact that when he’s not home with me and Toby he’s out there, somewhere, hurting someone? I can’t do it. That kind of violence has a habit of rubbing off on others. I didn’t just leave Martin because he hurt me, because he would’ve eventually hurt Toby, I also left because I didn’t want Toby to have that kind of toxic influence in his life. I don’t want Toby growing up thinking that violence is okay, because it isn’t. Look at how much damage it’s already done, to me, to Toby, to you, to Drix.”
“Which is why I’ve made a deal with Carl Gunn to write off Drix’s debt,” she says.
“What are you talking about? What deal?”
“Lia, Drix needed a way out, and I’ve found the solution. I’m willing to do whatever it takes so that he can be done with that life. I did it so that you three can be a family, if you choose to stay that is. I really, truly, hope that you do.”
“Daisy, what have you done?” I ask, a chill running down my spine.
“What I’m about to tell you goes no further. Even if you decide to still leave after everything I tell you, you must promise never to speak a word of this. I’m about to tell you some things about my past, and it’s important to me that you don’t speak about it to anyone. Please, Lia.”
“Daisy–”
“You have to promise me,” she urges. “It’s important.”
“Okay,” I agree, terrified of what she’s about to tell me.
“Okay.” Letting out a breath, she levels her gaze with mine. “Before I explain what I’ve agreed to do, I want to tell you about how I ended up in care, and how Drix saved my life.”
“He saved your life?”
“Yes,” she replies softly.
“How, Daisy?” I ask.
“I was five when I went into care,” she begins, her fingers tightening around mine. “I arrived at the foster home a month after Drix. I was malnourished, suffering from the effects of emotional, physical and mental abuse. I wasn’t a child, I was barely even a functioning human. I was utterly broken, as broken as any person could be.”
“Daisy, I’m sorry,” I whisper out, feeling for her, hating what she’s been through.
