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The good news is, he’ll have company once he’s done. Lynx, Zeke, and JP stayed behind as well, for a couple of reasons. One, it was less people we would have to “protect,” Asstro’s words, not mine. And Zeke wanted to update all of our rooms with outlets to see if we could charge our phones in Hell. JP had the urge to cook, and Lynx said he had other things to work on.
Before we left, Knots did promise Chester that he would keep an eye on Moni. She insisted she knew her plants and wanted to come help. So, who was I to turn down an extra pair of eyes to find the ingredients we need to find? The others are here for our protection, despite my protest.
“Are you saying you don’t like her because of what I said, or are there other reasons?” I whisper, keeping my eyes on the two sex demons in front of us. I’m curious if there are other reasons I’m missing. Ryker tried to apologize to me earlier, but I wasn’t in the mood to talk. At the moment, they are chatting and laughing away like best friends, but at least they’re keeping a respectful distance between them. His furtive glances my way tell me he’s thinking about me at least.
“Of course there are other reasons!” Moni screeches, and I hurry to hush her, but Zissa peeks over her shoulder at us, giving us a friendly smile. I find myself giving her a half-assed attempt at a smile, but Moni sticks her tongue out before she turns back around. “Rez. I’ve heard of Z before, but I thought he was a guy—not a hottie with an electric body.”
Her words strike a chord within me, where my insecurities run deep. Does he not find me attractive anymore? No, that’s silly. He even said he can’t get it up around anyone else but me. But that was around the Harpies, and this is his… ex.
A hand wrapping firmly around my bicep brings me out of my musings and face-to-face with a frustrated Knox.
“What are you thinking right now?” he demands.
“I–I… It’s nothing,” I stammer out.
“Really? Because that’s not what I’m feeling from you,” he admits and peers over my shoulder. I glance back and find our group waiting for us, and it makes me uncomfortable. “We’ll catch up. Continue on,” Knox says, and they all start walking.
“I think I’ll catch up with you in a bit, Rez!” Moni says, and she flies out of my curls, catching Knox off guard for a moment.
“Look, I know it’s driving you crazy not knowing the details about Ryker and Z. I can feel it here. You can’t hide it, Kitten,” he says, placing my hand over his chest. “But don’t you dare start questioning your worth. That’s my best guess at what you’re feeling. Am I close?”
My breath just seeps out of me with his words, and I deflate against him. He pulls me into him and wraps his arms around me. “I just feel so… less right now. It’s either that or I get pissed, but I’m not sure who to get pissed at, Knox. I don’t know Z, so it feels easier to get mad at her because I don’t want to be mad at Ryker,” I admit. “But honestly, I’m more frustrated because I’m annoyed at myself for even feeling this way instead of manning up and just talking to them like the adult I am supposed to be.”
Knox chuckles, and the gruff rumbling sound in his chest seems to calm my chaotic thoughts. He squeezes me just a little tighter, and his warmth reminds me of a warm blanket that you cuddle into when you need comfort.
“Kitten, it’s okay to feel things, even anger. Consider us Shifters; most of the time all we feel is anger and frustration. At least you know why you’re feeling it, and you even know how to fix it. Those are the hardest roadblocks I think there are when trying to figure out your feelings. Or at least they are for me.”
I lean against his firm chest and listen to his heartbeat for a few more minutes as I think over what he is saying. He’s right. I either need to man up and face Ryker and Z, or just wait until later. But if I wait, I can’t go around bashing myself or questioning shit when a simple conversation would solve everything.
I pull back enough to gaze up at Knox. “Thank you.”
“Anytime, kitten,” he says, and leans down to give me a sweet kiss that leaves me a little light-headed. Damn, I’m liking this dominating yet sweet Shifter.
* * *
We catch up with everyone right at the entrance to Hell’s Bazaar. It’s like a farmer’s market but with tents, furs, and questionable items that make up the stalls. The cobblestone path is gone, and in its place is a reddish brown dust that makes me grateful I can easily change my clothes. I can’t imagine trying to get this crap out of my outfits. Bright strings of big lights are embedded along the walls and along the tops of the tents, highlighting their wares. Some stalls look like they’ve been permanent structures since the beginning of time, while others are clearly portable tents that were set up for this occasion. The stalls range from clothes, pottery, herbs, and food. There are even sections where food hisses and pops over open fire pits next to smaller pits of brimstone. The entire atmosphere is exciting, yet strangely nerve-wracking.
Demons of all shapes and sizes are yelling at each other, trying to get good prices. I spot a few other creatures that I’ve learned about from school prowling around, giving me some semblance of normalcy. There’s a Gargoyle—
Oh my God. Since when do I think of any type of supe as normal?
Swoosh!
“Fuck! Astarte’s tits, who’s cussing around here?” a Demon by one of the fire pits yells as he tries to save whatever he was cooking.
Oops.
Whatever it was, I hope someone around here likes their food burnt.
Knots shoots me a knowing wink, and I roll my eyes.
‘Knew it was you,’ he teases.
‘It’s a habit. Sue me,’ I shrug.
‘They would do much worse than sue you if they found out it was you,’ he reminds me, and a shudder runs down my spine. I had totally forgotten there for a moment that Knots and I could communicate this way. But in all honesty, being in Hell, I wasn’t sure it was possible. I had thought it was only a Door Knight ability and he only had it since he was in the dorm. I’m definitely okay with this, though.
I lean up against my Door Knight and entwine our fingers. ‘Are you okay? I noticed you were laying on the sofa earlier,’ I ask, worried about him still. It’s so hard to keep up with everyone and make sure no one is feeling left out.
