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He turned a shoulder toward her. “I want you, Maggie. I want to be with you, be there for you as long as you’ll have me. And to you, I’m just a contingency plan.”
She tugged his arm until he was facing her again. People stared openly now. “I never said that. I just asked you to take it slowly. I’m still gaining my bearings here, my dad just died—”
“You’re only making my point for me.”
“It’s not that simple. I don’t know how I feel about moving my business to Deer Creek, about…” she trailed off, but Bennett’s name was on her lips.
“About me?” He finished for her.
A defeated sigh escaped her lips. “What if I figure out I can’t do this? I’ll have to go back to San Antonio no matter what, and what will you do then?”
“Don’t you think it’s worth talking about? We can make this work, but you have to be willing to let me in.”
“I have. When I decided to give this a go, the first thing I did was agree to go out with you.”
“I mean more than just going on a date. You have to talk to me, allow me to be a part of your life, your decisions.”
“Right now, going on dates and spending time with you is all I can give. It has to be enough.”
“Geez, Maggie. Don’t do me any favors.”
She felt the blow across her heart. It stung. “Why are you being so cruel?” she asked.
“I’m not trying to. But I’m bummed. We had a good time last night and you’re freezing me out. What did I do, Maggie? How’d I screw things up this time?”
“A good time?” she hissed.
His brows furrowed.
He still didn’t get it, did he? “You let me fall asleep at your house, Bennett. After a night of screwing each other senseless.”
Confusion spread to his lips, which contorted into a scowl. “So? We’re adults and I thought that meant more than—what did you call it? Screwing? I don’t sleep around, so to me, we’re a couple, Maggie. Like it or not.”
“And you think being coupled up will be enough to salvage my reputation when the town starts gossiping? I’ve worked too hard to build my own life, my own business despite the men in my life trying to decide what that should look like on my behalf to have a stupid mistake cost me both. And that’s not to mention the respect I’ve earned—”
“Stupid mistake? That’s what you think about me? About us? Good to know.” His laugh rode the edge between maniacal and sarcastic.
“I—I don’t know. It’s just moving too fast. I thought I knew what I wanted, but maybe I’m too ambitious. Maybe the mistake was trying to force this thing between us when I don’t know if I can pull off working the ranch and keep growing Steel Born.”
“Meaning I’m the thing that gets pushed aside?”
Water pooled along her bottom eyelids. “Bennett—”
“No,” he said, putting up a hand to stop her. “I get it. You’ve been telling me all along, but I was too stubborn, too happy at my own fortune at getting you back to listen. I hear you, though, Maggie. I really do.”
This wasn’t what she wanted, to fight with Bennett over what was more important to her—him or her job.
No, her heart screamed. Work this out!
Better talk about it now rather than later, when we’re both more invested, her brain chimed in. You deserve to choose what’s best for you.
What was that, though? Her dad had pushed her out of Deer Creek for a reason, and the month after his death she’d slid right back in like she’d never left. Emotions like guilt and grief floated in her chest, untethered. Only confusion stuck to her ribs, making it difficult to take in a breath.
“I don’t want to hurt you, but I can’t seem to stop doing that when we want different things right now, can I?”
“I only want you, Maggie. If that’s not what you want, let me know now before it kills me having to walk away from you again.”
“I don’t… I just… It’s all too much right now.”
