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I narrow my eyes at her. “I was drunk off my ass, okay?”
Lani narrows her eyes and shakes her head. “You can’t keep using that excuse. It’s not fair to leave him hanging. The guy likes you. He deserves an explanation.”
“And what am I supposed to say?”
“The truth might be good.” She bulges her eyes at me.
“Like you said, I don’t want to hurt his feelings, and it’s not like I can tell him I’m pregnant!”
“Why not?”
I whip around to gape at her. Has she lost her mind?
But that look she’s firing at me is making my insides squirm. Turning my back with a huff, I start tidying my desk, picking up scrunched gum wrappers and used tissues. “It’s not like you haven’t flirted with guys at parties before. It doesn’t take much to send out what you think is a light, playful message and for them to get the wrong idea.”
“I think you sticking your tongue down his throat and practically dragging him into a bedroom was more than a light, playful message. You do realize you’re treating him exactly the same way Casey treated you.”
My insides bristle, and it takes serious effort not to snap at her to shut up. Working my jaw to the side, I take a calming breath and mutter, “I never once said I’d call him. I didn’t give him my number, and he didn’t give me his either!”
“Because you bailed on him before he could get his pants back on.”
“We tell each other too much,” I mutter, throwing away my trash with a growl. Half of it lands on the floor. Dropping to my knees with a string of curses, I snap over my shoulder, “Stop being so judgy. You can’t tell me you haven’t kissed a random guy at a party before! You’ve had a one-night stand. You know how they go. A couple weeks ago, you went to that football party with every intention of getting laid. I haven’t seen you calling anyone back!”
My friend goes stiff, the muscles in her neck straining as she tries to counter my insults. “Stop changing the subject. You’re the one in the wrong here, not me.”
“I just don’t need some guilt trip right now. I have enough on my plate, in case you haven’t noticed. And you standing there being all Miss Perfect and judging my every move is making me feel like shit!”
Lani’s lips form a thin, straight line across her face, her nostrils flaring as she looks out the window. I watch those muscles in her neck ping tight, and my shoulders slump.
Am I seriously yelling at my only ally? She may not agree with my decisions, but she’s my best friend and I need her.
“Look, I’m sorry.” I close my eyes, my voice thick with remorse. “This pregnancy crisis is turning me into a full-blown bitch. I’m not trying to take it out on you. I just wish Ben would leave me alone. And I wish… you weren’t so unimpressed by me.”
Lani shakes her head. “I’m not unimpressed by you. You’re my favorite person on the whole damn planet. I just want what’s best for you, that’s all.”
I swallow, too afraid to ask her what she thinks is best for me. Her answer might be different from mine, and I can’t hear that right now.
Dropping the scattered tissues into the trash can, I stand up and straighten my shirt. The vibe in the room is tense and somber. I’m seriously hating it.
“So, anyway… how was that party?” I put on a bright smile, trying to turn this thing around. “I forgot to ask. You flew solo, but did you actually have a good time? Did you meet someone? Did you hook up and have hot, wild sex the way you wanted?”
She clenches her jaw and grits out, “I wasn’t looking for hot, wild sex.”
“Sorry.” I wince at her indignant glare. “I didn’t mean…” I sigh, hating how much I’m sucking at this. I’m trying to make things right between us, dammit. “So, you didn’t meet anyone?”
Lani licks her lips, shaking her head as she keeps staring out the window. “Nope. No one worth mentioning.”
Aw man. She looks so sad right now.
I close the space between us and glide my arm around her shoulders. “Don’t worry, babe. You’ll find your man one day.”
“I don’t need one.” She shrugs me off, lifting her chin. “I kinda like being on my own.”
My nose wrinkles. “Really?”
Why would anyone choose to be on their own?
Everybody needs someone, right? And being in love, that’s like the ultimate goal.
