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The mask he sometimes wore came down quick as a blink. “No, I haven’t.”
That’s it?she thought as he didn’t say anything else.
“And as for sex, it’s been a long time for me, too,” he tacked on. “I don’t connect with people real well.”
She had to smile. “You’ve done just fine with me.”
“You’re… different.”
As she looked at his face, and the dark shadow of hair that was coming in over his head… then let her eyes go down, to the skull with its vines and snakes and clouds flowing outward… and lower still, to his heavy, tattooed sex that lay on his thigh, another clarity came to her, and this time, she ached from it in a profound way.
They were starting something here, in this bed, in their hearts, in their lives. There was much ahead, much to meld, but he was right, there was a future to be had for them both, and she wanted it. She wanted to make her own family.
But she couldn’t escape one ringing truth that was going to destroy her in a way.
Loving Nate… was going to cost her her father.
Forever.
Lying in his bed with Nalla cozied up to his chest, Nate still kept thinking he was going to wake up. The idea that this female was here, with him, in between his Target sheets, under hisGod-only-knew-from-where blankets, was the kind of thing he was convinced he’d cooked up behind closed lids.
And yet… she was here.
He could do without her questions, though. Not because he was hiding anything—okay, fine. He was hiding shit. But he didn’t know what to say about Rahvyn, on so many levels, especially because there was no way he could talk about that female and not come clean about his plan for leaving the planet.
Which suddenly wasn’t looking like the get-outta-jail card he’d been thinking it was.
Nalla made him want to stick around: Now he knew exactly what his father had been saying about not wanting to talk again until Nate started to care about someone other than himself.
It was early with this female, but yes, he cared about her, a lot, and yes, it made everything different: Time wasn’t a burden, thanks to her. It was an opportunity. And he wanted to hoard it because even though he might live forever… Nalla wouldn’t.
Oh, God, he already didn’t want to think like that. And he also didn’t want to freak her out with the fact that he’d made a deal to end this immortality bullcrap… but she was making him reconsider that whole thing.
Too soon to admit she might very well be saving his life? You bet your ass it was.
“I don’t need you to be sophisticated,” he murmured as he skipped the question that was hanging in the air between them.
Had he ever been in love before? He might have said yes, up until recently. After Nalla, though, he was starting to think it was a no.
What was that old line… that the reason they called it a crush was because the shit hurt?
Drawn by the feel of Nalla’s warmth and her smooth skin, he brushed a hand over her shoulder… went back onto her collarbone… and up to the side of her neck where his bite mark had fully healed, thank God.
“Good, because I’m not,” she said quietly. “Sophisticated, that is.”
There was a pause, and the banked expectancy on her face told him she was looking for some information on his dating past—and considering all the things he didn’t want her to know about him, he figured his sex life was the least of a bunch of bad reports.
“I haven’t had any lovers.”
Her eyes bugged. “I—ah, you’re a virgin? I mean, were a—”
“No.” He cleared his throat. “I had some… professional interludes.”
“Like a training class on making love—” She stopped the joking as she connected the dots correctly. “Oh. Like… oh. Well… that’s—”
“I wasn’t a good bet for a relationship.” Okay, that was still true. “Back then, I was looking for extreme experiences in everything. Like, my time in the field, the tattooing… other things. And for a while, I found a couple of females who shared my interests, as you might call it. But when I realized I was the same person before and after, and considering that was precisely what I was hoping to get away from, I stopped with all that. Turns out you can’t remake yourself with distractions, no matter how hard you try.”
She seemed to get lost in her own thoughts. “People can try to change. But you have to be careful how and who you’re taking your cues from. I have a friend who’s into this social media guru—and I just don’t think it’s going to end well.”
