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I did, and he pulled me into his lap when I reached him. He wrapped his arms around me, burying his face in my neck almost as if he was hiding as he told me the story. “I picked up music young because of my grandfather.” He nodded toward the instrument in the corner. “That was his. He taught me everything he knew, which mostly comprised old country and bluegrass.” I felt him smile against my neck as he shook his head. “As I got older, I developed my own taste in music that leaned more toward—”
“Pantera?” I offered, biting my lip when he rolled his eyes.
“Rock. Any kind, really, but it was the guitar riffs that drew me. I pushed more in that direction, learning what I could, saving money, and buying an electric. I was a typical teenage boy with big dreams in a small town. Then Casey happened.” His head fell back, and he dragged a hand over his face. “I will never call her a mistake, but I was a dumbass kid, thinking with his dick, and it… shifted the plan. Took a little longer to get there, and I had a lot more hurdles than most. But I finally managed around the same time Henry shipped out to the Marines. California is where most people go, but I couldn’t handle the idea of being so far away from Casey, so New York seemed like the only other option. I worked two jobs, gigged with my buddy who came with me every chance I got, and then two others who joined later, praying every night someone would notice. Six months here, I had enough to bring Casey and her mom here.”
I trace the artwork trailing up his arm, running a finger over the skull clock of his bicep as he tells me about surviving on caffeine and desperation, sleeping three hours a night because after working 10 hours a day and gigging four hours a night, he went home and took care of his little girl. “The second I walked through the door, Krista would hand her to me and take off to hang with friends she’d met. I never argued because after being cooped up with a five-year-old fourteen hours a day, I figured she needed a break, and even though she was asleep, I loved my alone time with Casey.”
I nod, having no issue believing that. Casey had only been my dormmate for a month, but in that month, I could see how she was as much his baby now as she was when she was a child. “You’re a great dad, Liam. I hope you know that.”
“I don’t know about great, but I tried to be. Fuck knows Krista didn’t make it easy.”
“Casey knows,” I reassured him.
He cleared his throat and continued with his story, his embarrassment clear by the red tinting his cheeks. “So-um-about two years after we got here, Nicholas Lockwood came into the club we were playing. He was impressed enough to offer us a small deal. There was no instant success, but we were on track. Our first single made it to the top 100. The second did even better. When the album dropped, it went gold. Then everything went to hell.”
He buried his face in my neck once more, lips brushing the sensitive flesh there as he stroked my bare leg. It would’ve been easy to get lost in the feel of his big, rough hands on my skin and his warm breath at my ear. He wanted to distract me from the story, and my God, he was doing a phenomenal job, but I refused to let it go. I wanted to know more. I wanted to know everything.
“Then what happened?” I asked, pretending to be unfazed.
He told how they were on tour, and an anonymous tip got his bandmates busted for giving alcohol and drugs to minors, among other things. He’d flown Krista and Casey to be with him that night, or he would’ve gone down, too, but he was with Casey. Krista, however, went down because she left after they were asleep. Apparently, she’d been fucking the band the entire time. But she was let go because her only crime was being there. Or so he thought; he later found out she had help to get off without charges.
“We crashed and burned before we ever made it because of stupid decisions. Afterward, I thought I got lucky because Lockwood and Maxwell Davis offered me a job as a road manager to stay with the label. I knew the road, the routine, and it seemed like a way to stay involved, and maybe eventually get back in it somehow. I realized a little too late that Davis wanted to keep tabs on me and keep me away from Krista because they were fucking too. I was the fool all the way around with her for so damn long.” His shoulders lifted with a heavy sigh. I could hear the regret and shame in his voice. He’d already told me a lot about his ex, including how she was the love of his life despite it all, so I knew talking about it stung. “You already know why I stayed when she left, and part of me blamed—blames music for all of it.” I nodded because I did. He didn’t know what other option he had. He had more child support to pay than was legal, but Davis used his money and contacts to rig the system in Krista’s favor. Jobs for former musicians that paid enough to afford that were scarce. They had him cornered.
At that moment, I realized my feelings for him had grown more than I wanted to admit because hearing about her stung me, too, but I’d never let him know. I wanted to be the one he confided in.
I hummed a quiet tune as I ran my fingers through his hair. Eyes closed, I tried to shove the thought of her away. Forced down the knowledge that he would never love me the way he loved her. Pushed the feelings that were growing away, determined I could stop my heart from getting broken.
I rested my head on his shoulder and looked at him through my lashes. “Will you teach me?”
The space between his eyes crinkles, but I see the amusement dancing in those bright eyes. “Wouldn’t you rather your brother? Or Maddox? Ryder? I’m sure any of them would teach you if you asked.”
It gave me the perfect opening to ensure he was the one. Liam had a jealous streak, and I was not above exploiting it. “Considering how much interest Maddox and Ryder always show me, I have no doubt I could get them to teach me anything.”
His grip on my legs tightened, and his jaw started ticking. He knew I was telling the truth. Maddox and Ryder didn’t hide the way they flirted with me, and Liam spent a lot of time trying to find out if they’d ever gotten farther than that. The answer was no, we never journeyed down that path because they weren’t actually interested in me. They wanted to push his buttons, but he had no way of knowing.
A glassy haze fills his eyes. The turning wheels were obvious, and I would’ve given anything to know what he was thinking. Then he blinked, his focus returning to me. His chin jutted toward the guitar. “Get it.”
I leaped from his lap with a gleeful clap, skipped the six feet from the sofa to the guitar, grabbed it, and returned to him. He took it from me, set it in his lap, and closed his eyes. The tension in his shoulders fell away as he strummed across the strings, turned the tuning pegs, and showed me the basic chords.
“Now teach me a song,” I demanded with a grin, hoping he would play it first because I wanted to hear him play more than I wanted my next breath.
He shook his head and tugged me to his lap. “Pay attention.” His fingers danced over the strings, and goosebumps erupted over my skin. He didn’t just know how to play. He was good. Every bit as good as my brother. Maybe as good as Ryder and Maddox.
The familiar melody had me entranced. Then the chorus began, and he started to sing, his lips so close to my ear that I felt every word in my core. “Because maybe you’re gonna be the one that saves me.”
Two things became apparent right then.
He let them take his song away, but music was his home.
And I wasn’t getting out of this with my heart intact.
Liam
I walk into my apartment, toss my keys in a bowl by the door, and head straight for the fridge. Food and alcohol will hopefully help me process what the fuck just happened. One hand wraps around a long neck while the other retrieves a box of pizza leftover from last night. That damn restaurant she loves so much doesn’t serve real food. Just pretty little plates with portions for a toddler. I carry my feast back to the living room, setting the box and bottle on the coffee table, and plopping on the sofa with a groan. The replay of the last couple of hours is on a loop.
When they first appeared, I was positive Lily’s engagement was as real as my ex-wife’s… well, everything lately, but there were moments that left me doubting myself. Is she really with him? Did she really move on that fast?
I realize it’s not fast since it’s been a while since we were together, but…
