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Havingto work every day in the presence of Sonia Hill has been difficult. To say the least.
It doesn’t matter where she is in the building. I can feel her presence. Of course, we’ve been in meetings together and crossed paths throughout the day.
However, it doesn’t matter. My body has some sort of radar for her. I can feel when she gets closer and when she goes away.
It’s impossible to get any work done knowing she’s near.
Thank god, today is Friday. I don’t have to work on the weekends, even if I often choose to.
However, Sonia’s presence at the club might be as good a reason as any to take the weekend off.
Or…go in and see how she’s doing with the place.
That’s a problem for future Edwin to deal with. This evening, though, is special.
Jack and Abigail are coming over for our monthly “family” dinner. Although I’m not sure “family” encapsulates the fucked-up dynamic between a father and his two love children from different mothers.
Nomatter, though. I need the reminder that Sonia is completely off-limits. She could be one of my children.
I took a peek at her file when Farley was out of his office. Twenty-nine years old. Same age as Nate. That was humbling to learn.
But just as much as it was humbling, it was also stirring.
I know I look mature, but I look good for my age. I don’t think I’ve read any of her body language wrong.
She’s just as stirred by me as I am by her.
That just adds to my growing attraction to her.
Anyway, I can only hope dinner with my kids tonight gets my mind far, far, far away from Sonia.
Because Abigail told me she was able to convince Nate to come over.
I’ve tried to call him a couple of times this week to no avail. So, to be afforded a meeting with him in person is the biggest win I could get.
“Dad?” Jack’s voice cries out from the front hall.
“In the kitchen.” I dump out my final cup of coffee for the night. It’s not my best habit, but caffeine barely impacts me anymore. I’m just maintaining my addiction at this point.
Jack waltzes in, although I’m not sure if Jack ever waltzes. The only way people know we’re related is our same serious disposition. He’s a carbon copy of his mother from his tan skin to his thick dark waves of hair.
I met Mari just a year after Nate was born. Clarissa and I weren’t together. Didn’t even try to maintain a romantic relationship, so I was still a freewheeling twenty-something. I was vacationing in Hawaii, and she was a local girl. After a two-week whirlwind, I brought her back to New York.
I should have known that it would be doomed from the beginning, but at the time, I was still a romantic.
We moved in together, got pregnant, had Jack, and then…
I went off the deep end.
It wasn’t fair to Mari, and I’ve apologized since.
At the time, my father was grooming me to take on the Lyons Club. I was working all the time, feeling overwhelmed, so I needed an escape valve, not crying kids.
God, I was such a selfish asshole.
I regret it now. I do. But what’s done is done.
Mari remarried when Jack was twelve and popped out three more kids in succession. That was my boon because Jack didn’t want anything to do with the newborns and spent lots more time here with me.
