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“You’d really all do that for me? Drop everything there and come to the showcase at the end?” I gulped, not sure whether to laugh or cry with delight.
“Darling, I mean it. We’ve all been trying to figure out how to be there anyway. If you could get us a place to crash, we can probably afford the flights.”
“Honestly, I might even be able to ask Sarai to put you up in the park we’ve just built.” I considered it and how cheeky a request it would be. I could always offer to let Sarai take it out of what I would be paid.
“That would be even cooler,” Stacy said, the excitement in her voice clear. “We’d be able to support you, see what you’ve been working on first hand, and be there to celebrate with you and make sure you never face this dick alone ever again. Can you really swing it?”
Although I wasn’t completely sure, I knew it wouldn’t take me long to find out. I had an entire car ride back to Chicago to talk to Sarai about it. If this was possible, she’d soon let me know. And if it wasn’t, flying home from Chicago in a few days after exhausting every possibility to stay and feel like I could cope would be just as easy as flying home now.
With a plan in place, I finally felt like I could go to sleep and face the following day. There might be the odd awkward moment but I had a plan and friends who were going to help.
CHAPTER EIGHTY-ONE
Lukas
As I got into the car with Richard again, I tried not to think about how strange it was to be traveling back to Chicago with Sarai’s husband. He had been polite so far, and we had talked a lot about the game the day before, but it hadn’t been anything that could last.
When I’d gone back to Kit’s room this morning, I had found her already out of it, packed up, and my things all left neatly in one pile. It had been far kinder of her than I’d expected and it had hurt more because of it.
After booking a separate room I had considered what I might find when I went back. I’d half expected to find my clothes in tatters, shredded. Or all of them sold. Even Kit gone.
Instead, Richard had knocked on the door a few minutes later and let me know Sarai had decided she wanted a girls’ day with Kit. They’d already gone to grab a quick breakfast and set off. He’d said nothing about why. Or shown any awareness of anything that happened between me and Kit.
Of course, it had been the elephant in the room ever since. Or the car, at least.
I didn’t want to talk about it and it seemed Richard wasn’t going to bring it up, but I knew he was also missing out on a day with his wife so Kit could be with Sarai instead. Not that I wasn’t grateful he was with me. I was. I could have been making this journey alone.
The minutes ticked by in silence on the last stretch of our drive and it began to get uncomfortable. The more I thought about either of them saying nothing, the more I felt I might need to say something myself, after all.
“Did Sarai say why she wanted to travel with Kit today?” I asked, not sure where else to begin.
No matter how much I was angry at Kit for flirting with Peter and everything that followed, I was also hurting. I’d fallen in love with Kit far more than I’d intended to. She’d got under my skin. Every moment with her had been magical, and so much reminded me of her, including just looking across the car to the passenger seat where she had been on the way here.
After having her as my submissive and starting to teach her some of the fun ways we could play together, I knew the apartment would hold memories as well. The closer we got to home, the less I wanted to be heading in that direction.
“Sarai mentioned you and Kit would rather be apart right now and she didn’t want either of you to be alone. That’s all she told me, and I didn’t want to pry. If you want to talk about it, I’m happy to listen. But the only advice I’d give on either account is that you follow your gut and your heart and not the advice of anyone else. No one can know what you feel or exactly what happened. All we can do is be there for both of you.”
I nodded. It was a lot more wisdom from Richard than I had expected. And it made me feel better that Kit wasn’t trying to get them to hate me. No matter how much I might be working on a project with them, they didn’t have to let me be involved to the end if they didn’t want to.
Did I want to talk about it with them? Was there anything really to talk about? I didn’t know.
“I don’t want her to think I’m angry at her,” I said eventually. “Or that I don’t want to work with her, if she’s happy to keep working on the project.”
“I’d hope you both are still happy to do the rest of the work.” Richard let out a small chuckle. “From a personal perspective, of course. You’re both damn good at your jobs.”
“Thank you. I can remain professional for you.”
“Then, as far as I’m concerned, we’re still friends. I don’t know what’s happened, but I know you’re a guy with your heart in the right place and Sarai thinks the same of Kit. Sometimes, as much as we want something to work out, it just isn’t right.”
I nodded, preferring he think that than anything else. Kit hadn’t taken advantage of Sarai and Richard in any way as far as I knew. Which meant I could keep the rest to myself and just let them assume it hadn’t worked. If she told them anything else, it would be up to her, but it sounded like she wanted to keep it to herself as much as I did.
“I really mean it. Thank you. I’ve had breakups in the past where people haven’t been so…understanding.” The words came out before I could do anything to hold them inside.
It was the truth and Richard reached out to squeeze my shoulder, reassuring me I’d done the right thing in voicing the fear. “Sarai and I aren’t the sort to take sides unless something is really clearly a problem. As I said, both of you appear to have good hearts, even if you’re not right for each other. We want what we’ve always wanted, to enjoy working together and see everyone happy.”
As soon as he finished speaking, it was like all the tension was gone. I didn’t feel as if I was carrying some burden anymore and I knew he and Sarai weren’t going to kick me from a projectI had been enjoying. No doubt there would be some awkward moments before the end, but I had their support.
The showcase at the end, when we opened the site to the public, was going to be difficult if Kit attended, but I was hopeful I’d get through it. Even if it felt like my heart was torn open.
