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A beat passes between us as she looks up at me and I look back. The space between us thrums. My heart pounds.
I really, really wanna kiss this girl again. For real. But that’s exactly why I can’t.
fifteen
. . .
Abel
Hot Dog Dogs
Jen holdsthe girls in her lap while we take the long-ish drive to East Beach.
It’s clear across the island, but the twenty-minute ride is worth it. The beach here is wide, the sand buttery soft. It’s practically deserted, save for a few people I don’t recognize walking in the surf.
I carry my beach bag and the food. I brought the girls’ leashes, but Jen says she’s had them off-leash on the beach before and they did fine.
“They listen when I call them. Mostly,” she says as we make our way across the sand, the dogs trotting happily ahead of us.
I set down the bag halfway between the dunes and the surf. “They’re probably too hungover to wander very far anyway.”
“Good point. What can I help with?”
“Nothing.” But when I pull a blanket out of the bag, she grabs two corners and helps me lay it flat on the sand. “By the way, Cher and Tai inspired tonight’s dinner.”
“Treats smothered in peanut butter?”
“Hot dogs.” I crack open a can of pilsner and hand it to Jen. “And then the beer, obviously, since they drank all my tequila.”
The groove in Jen’s forehead deepens when I tap my can against hers. Our fingers brush and we both linger there half a second too long.
“This is really nice, Abel. Thank you.”
I sip my beer, the tips of my ears burning. “I like enjoying the finer things with my wife.”
Grinning, she looks toward the dogs and drinks her beer. They’re exploring the shoreline now, running into the water up to their bellies before dashing back out again. “Joking aside, I think picnics on the beach with friends and dogsareone of the finer things.”
“Should we sit? Eat?” If I don’t do something with my hands soon, I’m gonna be reaching for this girl. And now I don’t have the excuse of chasing off an idiot ex-not-boyfriend.
The dogs come running the second I open the bag of food. Tai jumps into my lap and waits there, tail wagging, as I devour my hot dog in large bites. “Okay if I give her a little?”
Jen nods, popping a potato chip into her mouth. “Only because this is another special occasion. We keep having those with you.”
Tai eats the bit of hot dog out of my fingers with surprising gentleness. Cher, incensed at being left out, also leaps onto my lap and nudges my hand with her sandy nose.
“You seriously think I’d forget you?” I ask, and give Cher a piece too. “So how was the hospital? Maren and Tuck happy?”
Jen washes down the last of her hot dog with some beer. “God, Abel, that was good. Thank you again. Can’t remember the last time I had a hot dog.”
“You forget how delicious they are, right?”
“Totally.” Another sip of beer. “The hospital was wonderful.Such a difference this time around. When Katie was born, Tuck’s ex-wife was really struggling. She didn’t want any visitors, and Tuck was a wreck trying to care for her and the baby. But seeing him with Maren...” Jen licks her lips. “There’s this beautiful ease between them. Very much a sense that they’re in it together. And the baby is gorgeous, Abel. Chunky and chill and just. Ugh. You wanna bite her face, she’s so sweet. I miss her already.”
I finish my beer and drop the empty can in the bag. “Think they’ll get a minivan?”
“They’d better not steal that part of my dream too,” she says with a smile.
A catch in my chest. Reminder that the things she dreams of aren’t things I’m able to give her, despite this delightful game of pretend we’re playing.
