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Yeah, fat lot of good that had done. Cabinet door, my ass. It was clear as the broken nose on Joey’s face that Daire had gone after him, tracked him down when I’d specifically asked him not to, and for what? Notme. For himself. And now everyone in our group—hell, the school—knew what had happened, or could at least guess.
This was the exact thing I’d wanted to avoid—a public showdown between my friends and Joey’s. But thanks to Daire, my breakup was now up for public discussion. Not to mention the reason why.
I ducked into one of the small alcoves away from the rest of the students making their way to class and clutched my bag to my chest, as the anger and humiliation turned to a bone-deep disappointment.
I’d woken up happy this morning, something I thought was next to impossible with the way my week had been going. But after last night and the easy connection I’d felt with Daire, I’d really thought that things were about to turn around for me. That I’d be able to start over in a new space, free of Joey, and finally be able to come into my own.
I could kiss that goodbye now. Daire had completely shattered my trust and made things with Joey a million times worse, because now he thought I’d ratted him out to my friends.
All I’d wanted to do was move on. I’d handled things, was ready to forget that one horrible night, and now, thanks to Daire, it had all come crashing back in.
Ding!
I pulled my phone out of my pocket, hoping against all hope that news hadn’t traveled that fast through the halls of Astor. But no, what I saw was almost worse. It was confirmation for the espresso machine I’d just ordered for Daire. The thank-you gift for him being so awesome and helping me out.
But now as I stared at it, all I felt was the bitterness of betrayal, the hurt of being lied to by the one person I’d trusted with my secret, and I couldn’t help but think how, in the blink of an eye, everything had changed.
FIVE
gavin
Present Day - Late March
THE WIND WHIPPED loudly against my window as a storm raged outside. Being on the forty-fourth floor only intensified the sound, but in a way it was comforting, like white noise, as I stared aimlessly out at the city skyline.
Tonight was no different than any other night, not really. The guys had all gone out to party it up somewhere, and I had once again made an excuse to stay behind. I was getting good at that. But it was easier than spending the night surrounded by happy, lovesick couples and actively avoiding the only person I would’ve normally stuck close to—Daire.
I sighed and stared at the rain-streaked glass, the buildings blurring in the distance, and couldn’t help but compare it to the life I’d had months ago. It was like a distorted memory now. One where I’d had a boyfriend, lived with my brother, and had a really great group of friends. Before things had gone sour with Joey, I was happy…or so I thought.
But now? Now my life looked extremely different.
I was single, not as close to my brother as I used to be, and, unbeknownst to Daire or my friends, still dealing with theaftermath of my breakup with Joey. Daire’s actions had only managed to give me a week or two of reprieve before Joey and his friends had started harassing me between classes. Nothing physical, but enough to make me dread the interaction and hope it passed soon.
Then there was the fact that I was living with a guy I barely said two words to anymore. That fateful day in December—that day when I realized the one person I’d trusted with my deepest, darkest secret lied to me—had turned my world on its axis, driven a wedge between us that I hadn’t been able to get past.
How could I, when the person who had done it had the emotional capacity of a brick wall? Daire wasn’t the kind to talk things out, to tell me why he’d done what he’d done. He offered no explanation for any of the actions he took, and gave no fucks.
The one thing he did know how to do was shut down. He knew how to block people out. To him, my silence was probably welcome. So I’d let it go. We existed in our apartment like two strangers.
It was…exhausting.Iwas exhausted, always worrying if I’d run into him. Wondering what to say. I just wanted one thing in my life to go back to normal. I wanted to go back to when he’d at least grunt an acknowledgment my way.
That wasn’t going to happen, though, not unless we cleared the air. Something I knew thatIwas going to have to initiate. For all I knew, Daire thought everything was cool with us. He’d always lived alone, so maybe this was him in his natural state. Silent and…well, silent.
The sound of the front door opening and booted feet striding through the house told me Daire was home for the night. From my open door I could see his shadow on the wall as he headed toward his room at the far end of our place, away from mine. It served us both well, each having our own “wings” of the expansive two-bedroom residence at the Towers. If thishad been the layout when I was living with Donovan, maybe I wouldn’t have had to move out.
On second thought, he and Kelly’s bedroom behavior was loud enough to annoy the neighbors, so this was a good change.
At least, it would’ve been if it wasn’t so tense. I could feel it in the air, thick and suffocating. Something had to give.
I picked my laptop up off the bed and set it aside. It was late, and I needed to get sleep more than I needed to get ahead on any assignments. I went to shut my door, but the sound of Daire’s opening again made me pause. From where I stood, I could see that he’d changed, not into something to sleep in, but into a different pair of jeans with a sleeveless shirt. He carried his leather jacket as he walked toward the kitchen, but he went out of view, and I could only hear him pour something. When he appeared again, heading for the door, he’d thrown on the jacket, and I frowned.
He was going back out again. Where, though?
This wasn’t the first or even fifth time I’d caught him leaving in the middle of the night, not returning until the early-morning hours.
Where was he going? And why was he keeping it a secret? None of the guys had said anything, and if they had even a hint of a suspected booty call, they would never let Daire hear the end of it.
So it was probably smart that this wasn’t group knowledge. Or even mine.
