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He finishes, ties the stitch off, and removes the rag from my mouth. He runs a finger over his work, then takes a damp rag to the places where the blood spread. He gently removes my corset, lifts my shirt to right below my breasts, and cleans my rib cage, my stomach, his touch so feather-light, it’s hard for me to believe it’s his.
“Where are we?” I whisper. The edges of my vision drag me toward sleep, but I force myself to remain awake.
He lifts a candle, its little flame the source of our light. “We’re at the far edge of the arena’s pit. Talis told me he had caves dug out into the walls, the entrances almost indistinguishable.” Cristen uses a small basin filled with water to clean out the bloodied cloth.
“Talis designed all this?”
He grimaces. “He likes his games. Sometimes, perhaps, a little too much.”
“So this tournament wasn’t your idea?” I grunt and shift myself onto my non-injured side, propping my head up with my hand.
He frowns. “In all honesty, I believe it’s a test for me as much as it is for the women fighting. As you know, I can’t read the threads of those closest to me. That very much includes myself. Seeing my own future is forbidden, but Talis and Cayafeelthings about my path forward. Talis felt I’d need a Queen, and Caya felt that it needed to be a protector, someone who could outmatch the rivals in our Kingdom.”
“And this fucked up tournament was your solution?” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “I kill people for a living, but neverinnocentpeople. These women don’t deserve to die like this.”
“This was set forth years ago,” he explains. “If there was a change in Talis or Caya, they’d tell me.”
I stare at him. “So you just do whatever they tell you. Like when Talis made you kiss me?”
He wrenches out the wet cloth, his biceps sharpening with tension. “I don’t get to make monumental decisions on my own, Zora. If I did, I would’ve married you already.”
“Oh,” I say, the word strangled as silence stretches between us. Heat rises to my cheeks, and I plant my gaze onto the cave floor.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” He exhales and settles next to me. “Even that kind of declaration could alter Fate. I can’t see your threads well, Zora, but I can see enough to know your future is thoroughly wrapped up in mine, in the Kingdom’s.” He clears his throat. “I’m just not sure if it will be a good thing.”
I look at him, mustering all my strength to get the next sentence out. “You don’t want me to be part of your future, but you’ll declare you want to marry me in a Gods-damn cave?”
He rubs a hand over his face. “What I want and what Fate wants are separate things.”
“Butyou’reFate.”
“I’maFate. I see the threads that hold this universe together. It doesn’t mean I’m the one who completely controls them.”
“So just to be clear — you want me, you just need permission?” I laugh. “That’s ridiculous.”
His eyes darken, and he smiles. “You’ve no idea how much I want you, but that’s for good reason. I don’t think you’d stick around.”
“You’re probably right. Especially since I’ve lost all my trust in you.” I lie back and close my eyes.
He lightly pulls my hair off my neck and presses a sweet kiss there. “What must I do to win back your faith in me?”
“You can do more of that,” I mutter, trying to move closer but drawing back with a wince of pain, my stitches pulling.
Cristen dabs at my forehead. “You have a fever. You need to rest.”
I nod in agreement, my cheek pressing into whatever soft, pillowy thing he placed me on.
“Good night, beautiful,” he whispers.
The last thing I feel is his lips on my temple, his fingers sliding through my hair —peace.
But somehow, I know, this is the calm before the storm.
Chapter Fourteen
Forthefirsttimein my life, I wake upsafe.
I peel my eyes open, and I’m face-to-face with a knocked out Cristen. His arm is firmly around me, his fist clutching the back of my shirt. I blow out a slow breath, my body feeling as at ease and secure as his face looks. No frown lines or turmoil. Just a man relaxed.
