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I was heartsick about leaving them all along, but I didn’t let myself dwell on it.
It hurt too much.
The shame that I feel for letting them down by not getting back to check on them sooner…that I left them at all…it’s unbearable.
I lose track of time going through the old routines I’d do with them. They’re low on food and thinner than when I left. There’s so little water left out for them it makes me sick. Emus drink 2-5 gallons of water a day, and not only do they need plenty to drink, but they love to play in it. The habitat I created for them is dry and scraggly. A couple of them have bare spots and their behavior is panicky. Not all of them, butenough who weren’t that way before, that it’s concerning. Their stalls are filthy, so once I’ve thoroughly looked them over, I get to work on cleaning up the barn.
There’s no sign of Thor and I find Stan lying under a tree, so it’s clear which one is gone. Stan was more of a loner than the girls, but he’s especially melancholy today.
I bend down and talk softly, holding my hand out to him. He startles and gets up, hobbling as he tries to move away quickly.
“What’s wrong, Stan? Is your leg hurt?”
He eyes me cautiously and when I hold my hand out, his curiosity would normally bring him right over, but he keeps his distance.
“It’s okay, buddy. I’m here now. I’m going to make sure you’re okay, all right? We’ll take a better look at you when you’re more comfortable, okay?”
“You’ve always talked to these animals like they understand you,” Junior says, snorting behind me.
I turn around and he holds his arms out.
“Welcome home, Ruby,” he says, his white teeth sparkling in the sunlight. “It’s about time you showed up,” he adds.
I glare at him. “You wanted this place so bad, but you couldn’t take care of them for even this short length of time? What are you doing here, Junior?”
A vein pops out on his head. I always hated when that vein popped out. It meant he was either angry or about to get condescending on me. He steps closer to me and tries to smile through gritted teeth.
“You made a fool out of me in front of our family and friends, but I forgive you. And you had your fun time away, but that’s over now. You’re back where you belong and it’s time we seal the deal, make our marriage official.”
My mouth gapes open. “I’m not marrying you, Junior. I thought that was clear when I didn’t show up at our wedding.” I scoff. “You don’t want to marry me anyway. I heard you myself.”
That vein pops out more. I don’t know how I ever thought he was attractive.
“Here’s how it’s gonna go: If you want these animals that are so precious to you, youwillmarry me.”
My eyes narrow. “Why?Why would you do this?”
His eyebrows shoot up and he lifts a shoulder. “Like I said, you made a fool out of me.” He looks me over and spits in the dirt next to him, his eyes full of disgust. “You need to make it right.”
“This is all about your reputation? That makes no sense. No one cares, Junior. If anyone cares now, they’ll be over it in a few months. Move on. You got the land, let me figure out what to do with the emus.”
“I’ll burn the barn down and everything in it, if you don’t marry me.”
I gasp, taking a step back.
He moves forward, getting in my face. “And don’t think for one second that you can sneak off into the night with these fucking birds. They belong with the land that’s mine.”
I start shaking. “Why would you do this?” I repeat. “How did I not see who you are?”
He laughs and my stomach churns.
“You were always so preoccupied with your fucking birds, you never did know sense when it was right in front of you.” He points his finger and he’s so close, it jabs into my nose. “I’ll give you two days. I know you like things to be pretty and we sure aren’t getting married with you looking like this.” He eyes me with disdain.
I don’t want to give him the pleasure of seeing me cry, butI’m so mad and shocked and scared, the tears start falling and don’t stop.
His lip curls. “I don’t need the fancy wedding—hearing you rattle on about wedding nonsense all those months was torture—but do something with your hair and get a fucking manicure, for Christ’s sake. My parents’ house, Tuesday at four o’clock. If you’re not there on the fucking dot—” He holds his hand up and makes the sound of an explosion.
He starts to walk away, but he turns around and points at me again.
