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“Priestess Shana?”
The voice breaks through our forbidden rendezvous. My heart pulses in my head and everything stops for a moment. How did I not hear the footsteps?
Being aware of someone else’s presence brings me down from the high of passion. I was completely blind to everything else around me. Sooner or later, this was going to happen.
But not like this. Why like this? Why were we even out in the open in the first place?
I shiver, staring wide-eyed at Carus. I freeze on the spot, the cold rippling from my toes to every nerve of my body. He’s caught off guard but doesn’t do anything to take his lips off mine. He’s waiting for them to simply leave.
This is all his fault!I scream internally.
But I’m not any better than him. I’m as much to blame as he is. I tried to remove myself from his temptations but ultimately fell for them… again. I’m ashamed to even call myself a priestess for Karona.
“Priestess Shana? Are you there? I thought I saw you, but now I’m not sure if I’m just talking to myself.”
I can’t recognize whose voice this is. Either way, it doesn’t matter who it belongs to, no one can see me in such a vulgar position. I’m torn between revealing myself and pretending Carus is an intruder or… just actually waiting and getting caught.
I move my face away from Carus, but he silently protests and holds me by the neck. He presses my lips against his. I hit his chest, trying to make him stop, at least just for now. Just until I know we’re safe from prying eyes.
The footsteps grow closer to us now. My heart races with each step. This is it, it’s over! I’m finished!
This is my downfall and before I know it, I’ll be banished from the temple. Her Majesty will cast me away and make me repent by being hated by her. I’m not ready to lose her love, I never was!
My eyes water, and Carus finally has a different reaction to the situation. He shakes his head, keeping my mouth shut in the same matter. I make a noise to protest, but it is a mistake to do so. The footsteps stop and then proceed even faster.
Carus’s heterochromatic eyes shimmer. Right after, the footsteps finally stop. Just an arm's length away from where we stand.
I heave, not wanting to go through any more of this mental torture. If they’re going to catch us, we might as well get it over with. Carus will end up getting what he wants in the end, at the price of my pride and dignity.
Then, another voice appears.
“Priestess? What are you doing standing here?” the other voice asks.
“I thought I saw Priestess Shana over here.”
“I see, but she’s already been found elsewhere. Please come with me.”
“As you wish.”
Just like that, they leave. Their steps get farther and farther away. I don’t know if Carus had something to do with it, with that dark magic of his, or if it's a miracle.
He relaxes his hold on me and smiles – as if he’s proud of this little stunt. I find myself scowling at him. Once I see the other priestesses are completely out of sight, I struggle out of Carus’s arms.
Perplexed that I’m freeing myself, he tries to continue what he was doing. Disgusted and outraged, I push him away. He tries to grab me again, but I slap his hand away.
He jerks his head back, almost surprised that I dare to defend myself.
“Don’t deny my hand,” he warns as he reaches for my waist.
I slap him away again. “Don’t touch me! Don’t you ever dare touch me again!”
His eyes narrow into slits. “Not touch you? What makes you think that I won’t –”
“Stop, just stop, please!” I plead. I bury my face in my hands, losing control of my tears. “This is all your fault. You did this to me! You destroyed my life!”
The second he stepped into this temple, he ruined everything for me. But I hate myself for ever giving in to him. For allowing myself to be malleable in his clutches. For desecrating this sacred place!
At this point, I think I would rather let myself be caught. I can’t bear this enormous guilt and shame that shouldn't even exist inside these grand walls. I won’t bear the rejection from Her Majesty, but at least I can be freed from this entrapment.
