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“Of course I didn’t. You wanna know why, Salva? Because I fucking loved you more than life itself. Because I’ve held you while you told me about your mom and stepdad while you were crying. I couldn’t be the one to hurt you, Salvatrice, it’s against my nature. Can you understand that?”
“I…” What could I say? That I’d heard him, but never truly believed him? Our love was real, but people have a tendency to let you down; all the time we’d been together, I waited for the hammer to drop and when his father came to see me, when he told me all the filthy things Roman was doing behind my back, and that he was not only part of, but actually shared blood with the Nucci family, I told myself that it finally dropped. Could I have told him that?
“Those people, Gino and Hugo, and their wives, Gino’s mother, Simona Nucci, cousin Vincenzo, Ignazio, so many you’ve never met: they are not only part of a crime ring, they are my family. And I was going to turn my back on them for you. I had no second thoughts or hesitation. For you, Salvatrice. You just didn’t give me a chance to show you what you mean to me, amore. Don’t blame me for the sins that aren’t mine.”
My heart started beating. I know that movies and books talk about how someone touches you and your heart skips a beat or two, but mine stopped beating six years ago. I only lived for my daughter now; Remy was the only one who powered me to move forward. Now, hearing him say all the right things, even if it was in vain and we had no future, it made me feel like I was shaking off the numbness.
“I’m sorry.” My voice cracked. I sounded worse than when I had a coughing attack.
“Go out with me tomorrow night.”
“What?”
“Tomorrow night. I love Romina and I love spending time with her, but I want to spend some time with you.”
God, the things this man was doing to me. We’d had our first date the first day I'd met him and after that he was all I could see, feel, or think about. Two years later I’d left him and he was still all I could see, feel, or think about. Now he was back, and I had so many things to worry about, so many bigger things, but all I could think about was being with him. Last night was rolling in my mind in repeat – every touch, every stroke, every time his cock moved inside me, filling me to perfection.
“Roman, but why?”
“I want to talk about Romina. I told her some things and I want to discuss it with you.”
“Oh,” I shouldn’t have been disappointed. I should have been happy that he was finally listening to me and stopped pushing for something impossible. “Alright then.”
He stole another kiss from me and it made me smile. This was his signature move. Every time I wasn’t paying attention he would strike and give me a quick kiss.
“I also want to take you out, so wear something nice for me, amore.”
“Roman!”
He slapped my ass to shut down my protest.
“I mean it, baby. I want to see you all dolled-up and wrapped in a sexy dress that will make me want to tear it off with my teeth, or I will spank the shit out of your ass.” I found myself pulled closer so he could whisper in my ear. “I would much rather fuck your ass than turn it red.”
Oh, my God. My body ignited like someone poured gasoline on a fire and now it was spreading.
One more time, I told myself. Just one more.
But isn’t that what I told myself yesterday too?
Whatever. If I ever owed something to myself, this was it. I went to the door and turned the Open sign on the other side.
“Come with me.” I dragged him through the door leading to my baking room.
“Damn, it’s hot in here.”
“The ovens ran all day. I had to bake five dozen cookies for a special order.” I jumped up on my workbench, not caring it was covered in flour or that I’d have to change after. “Kiss me.”
“Salva, what are you doing?”
“Come here and find out, brown eyes.” But my suggestive tone didn’t leave much room for interpretation. I wanted him. Right there.
“Amore, don’t tease me.”
Roman trapped me to the working table with his arms and sank his nose in the hollow between my breasts.
“I’m not.”
“What about Romina?”
