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“I’ve got you, Mia. I’ve always got you.”
“I’m broken, Ace,” I sob, the words barely legible through the crack in my voice.
“You’re not.” Lips press to the top of my head as he pulls me harder against him. The fact that he’s still clothed has butterflies dancing in the pit of my stomach. He didn’t bother to undress when he heard I was in distress. He came straight to me, just like he always has.
“I am,” I choke out. “They broke me, and I don’t think I’m ever going to be whole again.”
His hands drop to my hips, and he slowly turns me. Panic claws up my throat. This isn’t the body I imagined I would have all those years ago when I dreamed of Ace taking my virginity. The scars from my years in the skin trade aren’t just emotional, although I’m not sure which of the two I’m more ashamed of.
But his eyes don’t drop to my naked body. They lock with mine, the intensity in the green takes my breath away. He presses me into the cool tiles, one hand on my hip holding me in place while the other moves above my head, effectively trapping me.
I take a stuttered breath, willing down the terror that tries to rise. There’s an endless number of people who have forced themselves on me, who have held me in positions against my will, but this is Ace. No matter how cold and ruthless he’s become in the years we spent apart, he’s still the boy who protected me. He wouldn’t hurt me the way other men have.
“Listen to me, Mia, and listen fucking hard. You are not broken. Not to me. As long as you’re breathing, as long as air moves through your lungs and your heart beats, you’re not broken to me. Maybe the pieces of the girl I once knew have been glued back together, but I’ll willingly cut myself on your jagged edges if it means I have you back.”
I open my mouth to respond, but there are no words. Ace has always had the ability to render me speechless, even when we were kids, and nothing has changed despite the time we spent apart.
“Do you understand, Mia?” He lifts my hand to his chest, and my fingers wrap around in his damp T-shirt. His heart beats heavily beneath my hand. “This beats for you, Mia. It’s yours. It’s always been yours. And it will always be yours. So, no, you’re not broken. You’re every-fucking-thing.”
Before I can think to speak, his lips crash down on mine, desperate to taste me. His tongue demands entry, and I’m powerless to deny him. And even if I could, I wouldn’t want to. I want to give him everything, even if I’m not the girl I was. I want to be whatever he sees when he looks at me like I’m his entire life.
I wrap my arms around his neck and tug him against me until I truly am trapped between his body and the wall, and something deep inside me settles. Is it all kinds of fucked up that the first time I’ve felt truly settled is when I’m caught without an escape? Yep. But I don’t fucking care.
He lifts me easily, and I eagerly wrap my legs around his waist before my back hits the cool tiles with more force.
Ace’s kiss is rough and untamed. All the passion and pain ravels into one neat package that takes my breath away. But I can think of a million worse ways to die.
Teeth collide, and he nips at my lips, leaving them sore but needy. I need more. I need everything.
Without thought, I find myself grinding on his very hard length through his sweatpants, desperate for any kind of relief from the fire burning in my core. Hours of frustration. Hours of trying to reach my own release only seems to make my desperation worse.
“Mia,” he moans, his lips moving over my cheek, kissing every piece of exposed skin he can reach. “We need to slow down.” His voice is pained.
I stiffen in his arms, dread washing over me like a cold bucket of water. Of course he doesn’t want me like that. Not physically. Because despite what he says, I am broken. Why would he want to be with someone who has been used the way I have? He hasn’t seen the scars that litter my body yet, but as soon as he does, he’ll only grow more distant.
I unlock my legs from around his waist, carefully dropping myself to the tiles. But he doesn’t let me put any distance between us.
Ace drops his forehead to mine, his heavy breath whispering against my cheeks as he struggles to rein himself in.
“It’s fine, Ace. I understand.” I shove against his chest, but he’s too solid, he goes nowhere. In fact, I think he actually presses closer, making sure I couldn’t run even if I wanted to.
“Whatever the fuck you think you understand, Mia, I assure you that you don’t,” he growls.
I open my mouth to argue with him, but his hard stare stops the words before they can fall from between my lips.
“No, sugar. You don’t understand how fucking badly I want you. How badly I want to sink into your sweet body and fuck you until you can’t tell where my body starts and yours ends. But when I walked in here, you were crying. I’m a lot of things, but I’m not a fucking asshole. Not with you. I won’t take advantage of you when you’re vulnerable. No matter how much you beg or how sad your eyes get because you think you understand shit you have no idea about. So, until you enlighten me about why you were rubbing that sweet little pussy and then immediately started crying, this is as far as we’re going today.”
Heat floods my cheeks. He saw me. He watched me try and fail to reach my release.
Somehow that’s worse, because there’s no way he’ll believe any lie I try to tell him.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
ACE
Tears glisten in the big, beautiful pools I find myself lost in so often.
I was too harsh, but I can’t fucking stand it when she says shit about herself. And I won’t tolerate it. She needs to see herself the way I see her. Beautiful. Strong as fuck. Incredible in every single way. And until she does, we won’t be taking things any further.
