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“Can I ask you something?”
“Anything,” I reply.
“You said you know what you want,” she hesitates, fidgeting. “What is it?”
I stare into her serious eyes and want to give her a serious answer. “When I was younger, I didn’t think about a mate. As the years passed, I wanted to work hard, move up in the pack, and be a good brother. We had lions in the pride that had multiple mates, so it was normal. I didn’t think of it as a joke or something to strive for either. It just was.” I put my back to the counter and cup my hands on the edge. “We didn’t talk about having a mate, my brothers and I. I think in the back of my head, I thought it would happen how it was supposed to.
“Lucas and Las were my world. We shared our joys and accomplishments, but we lived as boys. We went to parties and had girlfriends and friends. We never got involved that deeply with the girls we dated. We didn’t feel the pull that we heard about, so we knew it wouldn’t last longer than a passing crush. We didn’t search for a mate, and we didn’t know if we would share one or not. That choice, we assumed, was out of our hands.
“Life was good, solid. We had fun, drank too much sometimes, and made mistakes that made our dad so mad.” I smile. “Lucas and I could test his patience.”
“Not Las?”
“Las was too busy cleaning up after us, most of the time anyway. I feel bad that we have tested his patience many times, too. He was always quiet, and I would try to cover for any uncomfortableness he felt in certain situations. He was unsure how to act in crowds. I used my personality to take the attention away from him. I loved them both. I liked that they looked up to me in some ways. I was really good at school. I like numbers, so I excelled in math. I took pride in completing the work correctly. Lucas hated school. He loved the social aspect of it, but when it came to school work,” I shake my head. “It was hard for him to concentrate on it. Las would do well in English, but math was never a strong suit. I would help them. I loved that. The nights I spend with them bent over books. I suppose I liked that they needed me. I felt valued. It probably sounds odd, but it made me feel good.
“They both have come a long way since then. Las helps me with the business side of the company. Lucas has calmed down and can build anything.”
“I don’t want to pry or delve into something you aren’t ready to talk about. But you talk about them and the past much differently than you interact now,” she says softly.
“We were always so close,” I start. “We just reconnected not long ago. I came here first. They found me here.”
“Found you,” she prompts.
I look at her from the corner of my eye. “The time that I spent away from my brothers was my fault,” I start.
She leans closer. “What do you mean? Is it related to what Lucas shared?”
“Fuck, this is harder than I thought.” I rub my hands over my head. “I don’t want you to see me differently,” I say, voicing my fears.
“Why would I? Handsome…” She leans into me. “Logan, you can tell me.” Her fingers wrap around my forearm.
I keep my eyes glued to the wall. “I was taken,” I whisper. “I was feeling the pressure of being in the pride. All the fights we had to go through just to prove that we weren’t just favored because we were the Alpha’s sons.” I swallow harshly. “I was reckless. I went to a bar without my brothers and met a woman. She drugged me.”
“Jesus,” she gasps. “What did she do?”
“She had a group of men helping her. I passed out. The next thing I knew, I woke up in a cage.” Breeane’s hand tightens.
“What?” she breathes.
“I was locked in a cage for months. I have never felt so weak and hopeless. A lion should be powerful.”
“Logan,” Breeane cries. “I—”
“I need to tell you. That was why Lucas started fighting. I am the cause of his loss. They searched for me for months with no leads. When we are put into a car, our scent is cut off. There weren’t any leads. It was as if I just disappeared.
“The man that was in charge was River’s uncle. They called it the games. Games that hunted shifters of all kinds. We were put in collars, a version of souped-up dog collars.” My voice lowers. “That was what we treated like, dogs, but even worse. I had to run for my life, hide, eat dog food, and live on the rage that burned in my stomach.” Breeane sniffles.
“They broke me in a way that I don’t think will ever completely heal from. It is my secret shame.” I cross my arms, and her hand falls weakly to her side. “Ava saved me. She was kidnapped as a way to get to River. She woke up in a cage just like me, but by that time, I didn’t pay attention to the new shifters. What was the point of speaking?
“Until River and Kerian came for Ava, that was how I thought. I was running in a game at the same time Ava was, and she saved me. She could have left me to the asshole that was chasing her. I gave her the perfect opportunity to get away.
“I will always be grateful for her strength.” I clear the lump in my throat. “When I was free, I didn’t know how to act, where to go, or who to trust. It was such a shock to be able to make my own decisions again. While I was there, they had all the control. I couldn’t go home because what if they turned away from me? What if they were ashamed? I couldn’t bear the condemnation in their eyes that I was certain would be there.
“So, I traveled a bit, attempting to find who I was now. My feet led me close to my home, where I came from. I was careless, or maybe I wanted them to find them. I didn’t do much to cover my scent. Of course, they knew I had been there, and they followed.
“I came back here, to this place that seems to gather all kinds of shifters and vampires. The misfits,” I chuckle. “I didn’t know how to fit into a place that welcomes you, protects you, and doesn’t ask questions. The cage locked away that feeling. They found me here, cursed me, and then demanded answers. I couldn’t tell them. I gave them general answers that lacked any of the horrible parts. Somehow, they let me get away with it.
“I have waited too long to open up to them, still clinging to the belief that they would condemn me for being so careless and not strong enough to find a way out.
