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* * *
In a foul mood, I teleport home.
Sometimes, being magical sucks. A human male never has a mating curse hanging over his head. A human male never worries about his missing instincts. He simply weighs whatever feelings he has and makes a rational choice.
Right now, I feel anything but rational.
“So you’re finally back?” Raiden lounges in the doorway. Then his eyes sharpen on my magical signature. “You Called to her? Are you out of your fucking mind. Do you want her to die?”
Of all the things I thought my twin would say, concern for Kari’s safety wasn’t even on the list. “Of course not. But she was nearly killed a few days past.”
“What? Is that why the Brew has been closed?”
I nod. “Did you know Mathias d’Arc has returned from exile? And he’s creating an army he’s using to kill innocents?”
Raiden blanches. “No.”
“Yes.”
“How is that possible?”
So my twin had no idea, either. Little wonder, since both of us have been shagging our way through life, giving little thought to tomorrow, to roots, or to family.
I don’t want to be like my father, slowly aging and alone, constantly fucking women who seek fleeting gratification with any halfway good-looking bloke. Raiden will soon have a youngling of his own, and if he’s happy, that’s great. But I don’t want a child with a woman for whom I have no feelings.
Bloody hell, if this doesn’t make me the family freak.
“I don’t know exactly, but some of Mathias’s followers attacked the Witch’s Brew. Kari almost didn’t make it.”
“Because we’re cursed. You know that.” Raiden rakes a hand through his long golden hair. “She would likely be dead if she’d spoken the Binding.”
“That’s why I made her promise she never would.”
“Good. You need to give her space so she moves on. Resume your normal life. We’ll go out tomorrow night and?—”
“I can’t.” I close my eyes. I don’t want to confess this, truly. But I can’t lie, especially to my twin. “Once I Called to her, something inside me…changed. I don’t want another woman.”
“Are you saying you plan to be faithful?” Raiden spits. “To a woman who will never be your mate?”
“I know it sounds foolish?—”
“It sounds ridiculously self-sacrificing, actually. You need energy to power your magic. To live. If this is some barmy trick to deepen Kari’s feelings for you, stop. She’s already madly in love with you.”
And I hurt her deeply. Shame roils through me.
“Not anymore. She thinks I bedded another woman.”
“You didn’t?”
“I couldn’t. And I don’t want to hurt Kari again.”
“Listen to me. You can’t complete your mate bond, or you’ll have her death on your conscience. You need to find another woman to power your magic?—”
“Or I’ll die. I know.”
So I must either perish, break Kari’s heart, or be the cause of her demise.
“But I tried to bed another woman,” I tell Raiden. “I couldn’t abide her touch, her smell. Her kiss made me retch. Literally.”
