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You don’t make connections.
He didn’t.
Mostly because of the choices he’d made about his life. Carter was a hired gun. He moved in and out of the shadows, doing unforgivable things that had made him a very rich man and a lot of enemies. He was rich but had no real substance in his life.
His thoughts drifted to McKenna. She wasn’t the type of woman who could exist in his world. A very complicated world that he’d created for himself and despite knowing he was stepping away, there would still be the possibility of his past creeping back into his future.
Until recently, Carter felt he would be content sharing his time with women that wouldn’t expect much of him. He hadn’t wanted a wife or children but now the thoughts crept into the recesses of his mind. Thoughts he pushed away because the woman who’d sparked those thoughts didn’t deserve to live her life constantly looking over her shoulder the way he did.
Carter lived with guarantees. Uncertainty created conflict. He could easily present McKenna with an offer to spend time with him, take a chance to get to know him, but he knew who he was and what his life looked like. He wouldn’t dare put her in the middle of his bullshit. He could keep her happy but there was no guarantee that he could keep her alive and well. Him being in her life was a hazard. If she was ever associated with him, she would be at risk, a target.
Maybe if I knew who the fuck had a price on my head, I could end this shit and we could…
He closed his eyes and laughed dryly at the thought. His father had loved his mother more than he’d loved himself. He’d lived his life deeply rooted in the bad choices he made which meant she had too.
His mother had understood the risks attached to a man that lived his life making enemies but she’d loved him so she stayed. There were rules but not every man had lines they wouldn’t cross. So one day that should have been just like any other, Carter’s world was changed.
His mother never made it home from the grocery store, but a message about why she hadn’t showed up on their doorstep the next morning. His father spent the next twenty-four hours dropping bodies before he was ambushed and someone dropped his. Within forty-eight hours, Carter had lost both of his parents and the fairytale that the life he’d chosen could have a happily ever after.
“This shit isn’t for me,” he mumbled.
With the confession, he closed his eyes and drifted to sleep because the alternative—staying up stressing himself about shit that would never happen—wasn’t appealing.
Chapter Five
Day 2
The next morning, McKenna awakened early, feeling a reminder of her previous night when she’d tossed and turned in bed, searching for comfort in hopes that she could drift back to sleep. Her body expressed its displeasure to the soreness she felt in her thighs and between them. She shifted a few more times then gave up on finding comfort or gaining a few more hours of rest. Consistently working twelve-hour shifts had her body programmed and being up shortly after the sun was not easy to ignore.
Losing the battle between sleeping and being awake, McKenna tossed the covers back with a disappointed groan and quietly moved to the bathroom. Her eyes darted to her bedroom door which was partially open and her eyes rolled while a smile surfaced.
Why am I being quiet in my own damn house just to make sure I don’t disturb a man who I didn’t invite here in the first place.
She entered the bathroom and, after emptying her bladder, she washed her hands and face then stared at her reflection in the mirror while brushing her teeth, hating the answer that settled into her thoughts.
Because you like him and you like him being here.
“I’m seriously deranged,” she mumbled before spitting out toothpaste and rinsing one last time.
She wiped her mouth, yanked the silk scrunchie from her hair, and raked her fingers through it before tugging a Denman brush through the ruffled tresses. Her chocolate hued hair barely reached her shoulders and fell around her face in layers that the stylist had promised would give her cute and simple with minimal effort. So far she hadn’t been disappointed. Pulling it back at work kept it neat and out of the way but as soon as she set her hair free, she could easily rake her fingers through it and present the appearance of having a style.
Since she was dressed in her typical tee and panties, McKenna yanked on slouchy, calf-length sweats and was about to leave her room when her phone vibrated with a call. She quickly hurried across the room and swiped to answer, knowing her mother rarely called unless there was an issue. McKenna was the one who normally reached out.
“Hey Ma, everything okay?”
“Yes, fine, sweetheart. Just wondering if you talked to Tevin.”
“No, why?”
“He called a few days ago and said he was going to get in touch.”
“He didn’t need you to inform me that he was going to reach out. He has my number. In case you forgot, we dated for two years.”
“Of course he does, but would you have answered if he called? The last couple times he tried, you didn’t.”
“I’m busy, Ma. I work long hours and…”
“And you could have returned a call when you weren’t working. He wanted me to ask you to answer when he calls.”
