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I linger near the doorway. Am I fine? My heart is pounding, I’m feeling really warm, and — oh, yeah — Dana Kirby is in my bedroom because we’re about to have sex.
“I’m gonna run back down and grab some water,” I say. “Be right back.”
I leave, taking my time as I traverse downstairs. What the hell is my deal? Like Courtney said, it’s bumping uglies with a pretty girl for fun. That’s all this is. I do it all the time, and yet… something feels different.
Shut up, man.
You know why this one is different.
I grab two bottles of water from the kitchen, spotting the handwritten note left on the refrigerator from my mother.
NO PARTIES. Love you. XO
I smile. Wonder how she’d react to this.
Luckily, I’ll never have to know. They’re far across state lines by now.
I walk back upstairs, taking my time again, telling myself repeatedly to pull myself together before I get there.
Dana’s standing over my desk when I get back, gently leaning over it to stare at the photos pinned to my wall above it. She hasn’t noticed me yet, so I pause. Just to watch. Just to take one last breath before everything between us changes forever.
“I forgot your hair was that long,” she says. Guess she knew I was here.
I step in. “Yeah. Eighth grade was a… weird time.”
She laughs, then turns, her hair cascading down her back as she looks at me over her shoulder.
Fuck, she’s pretty.
I give her a bottle of water.
“Thanks,” she says. She runs her fingertips around the cap, but she doesn’t twist it.
I take a sip from mine, hoping the cold water chills my boiling insides, but the broken sweat on my brow remains.
“So, where do we start?” Dana asks.
I swallow hard. Where do these things start?
In my experience, they usually just… happen.
“Uh…” I place the cap back on my water and set it on the desk. “Well?—”
“I talked to Jacinda tonight,” she blurts out, nervously tapping her nails against the bottle cap.
My chest lurches. “Oh, yeah?”
“I mean, obviously, we both did, but I talked to her earlier, too, and…” Dana pauses to breathe. “So, we were at Speed Friendship which—” she laughs, “was just as lame as it sounds, though I guess it kinda worked because I think she and I are friends now, which is weird, but also kinda fine? I dunno?—”
“Dana.”
“Right. Anyway. We had to ask each other personal questions and the only one that came to mind to ask her was about… you.”
Aw, shit.
“About me?”
“Well, the both of you. The two of you.” She presses her lips together. “Why you broke up, specifically.”
